


Written in Blood: Visionary

by Sakurafox666



Series: Written in Blood [3]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Anal Fingering, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Begging, Developing Relationship, Dom/sub, Edgeplay, Fluff, M/M, Marking, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Pack Bonding, Power Dynamics, Rimming, Scott and Deucalion are both stubborn, Submission, Werewolf Mates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-04
Updated: 2016-11-09
Packaged: 2018-06-06 09:55:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 51,372
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6749017
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sakurafox666/pseuds/Sakurafox666
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The path of a visionary is a fragile, dangerous thing. Beware not to stare too long into the sun lest you destroy yourself.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> EDIT: This is a three part story, I strongly recommend reading Heart of Darkness and Paper Moon first otherwise several parts of Visionary won't make sense. Thank you.
> 
> And the moment everyone has been waiting for! Act 3 is finally here! I'm so sorry this took so long, I've been working on this for about a year now and I lost my first beta halfway through and needed to find a new one...who then had to read the first two Acts so they could understand everything. Needless to say it set me back for a bit but it all worked out and now I'm so happy I can finally share this with everyone. Please, please, please feel free to leave feedback and let me know what you think.
> 
> And on a side note: how happy was I that Deucalion was back for 5b? OMG words cannot describe. Was it so wrong that him being chained to a chair for several episodes was a little bit of a turn on? Do I have some one shots I know want to write? Yes, yes I do. Those must wait until later. Heart of Darkness comes first.
> 
> This chapter was co-beta'd by Stately_Demented and underwater-smiles! Go check out their respective pages here: http://archiveofourown.org/users/Stately_Demented/pseuds/Stately_Demented and https://www.fanfiction.net/u/3516421/

* * *

Scott glanced around, his world covered in blinding white; he blinked several times.

"Shit." He knew where this was. He was back in that white chamber where the ritual had taken him, Stiles, and Allison. Although, this time there was no bathtub or Nemeton, and he wasn't soaking wet. _Thank god_.

A growl sounded behind him and Scott whipped around. A white wolf sat a ways away and the younger alpha tensed.

"What do _you_ want?" Scott braced himself. The white wolf tilted his head. Another growl sounded and Scott jumped as a grey wolf walked past him, paying the young man no heed.

 _I was told my death would be my own choice._ The white wolf's eyes burned into Scott's, blazing red. _I was told I would save another of my kind, a young alpha: true but lost._

"Me?" Scott felt stupid. Of course him, who else would Akh be talking to? Or not really talking, but Scott could feel the voice in his head.

 _I said only one thing could cleanse your darkness_.

"Death."

 _My death. A ritual sacrifice like the one you performed so long ago. Like yours, it was done out of love_.

"Love?" Scott scoffed. "You don't even know me. And your pack—some of your pack died and mine almost followed!"

 _Nothing worthy is ever achieved without a cost_. The white wolf stood up and joined the gray. _You fought me in righteous anger to cleanse your hate. You healed your pack to purify your darkness. The rest is up to you_. He turned and walked away.

The gray wolf looked back at Scott, golden eyes glowing with a vibrant intensity, and the young man felt something flicker in his mind; an echo of Deucalion's voice.

"Anubis?" he asked, but the gray wolf turned away and they both vanished from Scott's sight, leaving him alone in the white abyss.

 

* * *

 

When Scott opened his eyes again the glaring whiteness still surrounded him. He sighed loudly. A heartbeat close to him skyrocketed and there was a flurry of motion.

"Sc—Alpha!" Deucalion's face hovered over his, glasses dark, mouth a thin line and jaw tense. "Y-you're awake! I—"

"You're here." Scott's chest eased and he gave a small grin. Deucalion wore his regular street clothes, hair unkempt and stubble thick along his jawline. He looked paler than Scott remembered. The younger man blinked as he realized the bigger issue.

" _I'm_ _alive_ ," he remarked and felt stupid for saying it out loud. Scott struggled to look around, neck stiff and sore. He appeared to be in some type of hospital, given the sterile environment and plethora of machines wired up to his body. "How'd _I_ get here?" Scott winced as he peeked down at his chest and arms, unsurprised to find them wrapped tightly in gauze.

"Derek." Deucalion answered shortly and Scott noticed a tremor running through his fingers.

"He woke up?" Scott prompted when the older man didn't continue.

"We all woke up." Deucalion ran a hand through his hair, mussing it further. The whole rugged look he had was slightly distracting. It was so odd seeing it on the older man—and rather _attractive_. A broken note in Deucalion's voice dragged Scott back to the conversation. "Aiden and Ethan were screaming at you. I-I couldn't hear your heart." His face twisted in anger, lips pulled back and fangs showing. Scott swallowed as guilt pierced his chest. "Derek grabbed you and made for the nearest hospital."

"Derek?" Scott tilted his head as he listened but didn't hear his pack close by. "Deucalion, I took in so much pain my blood turned black. I _shouldn't_ be alive."

Deucalion took a shuddering breath, shoulders tense. His entire body was coiled taut and ready to snap. Scott wondered when he had last eaten or slept. "You almost didn't survive. You lost so much blood, you were nearly dead when Derek brought you in. I-I thought—" Deucalion silenced himself, unable to continue. Scott turned away and tried to organize his feelings. He still felt empty, like there was a hole in his chest. A bitter thought rose to mind.

"I should have died."

" _Don't say that_." The fury in Deucalion's voice startled the younger wolf. "You never deserved to die, not once. Not for what you did."

"For what I did to you...to Aiden, for how many people I killed—"

" _Scott_ ," Deucalion cut him off, voice hard. "I heard your conversation with Akh."

Scott's hands clenched the sheets. "Wh—how? We were clear across the ruins, in a totally separate area."

"My hearing in better than an average wolf's." Deucalion pointed to his sightless eyes, hidden under dark shades. "And if I concentrate, I can extend it even further. Your voice...has always been easy to pick out."

Scott was cautious. "You heard everything?"

"You mean, did I hear how I'm responsible for all the pain you've been through? Yes, I heard that part quite clearly." Scott could see the anguish on Deucalion's face. His voice was barely above a whisper as he continued, "That I broke you so completely, I inflicted my own wretched darkness upon you and left you to suffer with it alone. That you have been fighting the insanity of those voices for years whereas I gave in immediately. You were consumed by sins not yours and kept struggling to fight even as you failed—I, Scott— _oh god_ —"

Deucalion buried his head in his hands and Scott watched as the man pulled himself together from the brink of an emotional collapse. He tried to reach out and touch Deucalion but the man jerked away. "No; to answer your question."

"What question?" Scott asked.

"The one you asked that first night: if I wanted you to become this." Deucalion dropped his hands and turned towards Scott. "I had wanted to break you, wanted to claim and make you mine, but I never intended to make you more of a monster than me."

Scott's mouth went dry and he tried to swallow, eyes becoming wet. "I—"

"But I did more then break you," Deucalion continued harshly. "I made you impossibly strong and ruthless, cruel and brutal. The type of alpha I feared most: one that could dominate me. I was a proud and arrogant man and you brought me down, dragged me off the false pedestal I'd placed myself on and reduced me to nothing." He paused and his voice became venom. "And I _deserved_ it."

"No—"

Deucalion cut him off again. "Scott, I knew within the first few months that you were constantly in a great deal of pain. I saw the regret in your eyes when you hurt me, knew that your actions weren't of your own choice. After every heat I would sit outside of the bathroom and listen to you scream and cry. I _knew_ , but I was angry with you. I wanted to hate you so desperately that I ignored your pain and the guilt I felt. I refused to try and help you until it was too late."

"Too late?" Scott echoed, confused.

"When Aiden attacked you and I protected him. When _I_ became the betrayer. You made an impossible choice after being betrayed by several of your betas—one that even belonged to you—and you let us _live_. I realized then that even at your lowest you were still _you_ , the boy I first met, the True Alpha, and that compassion ran deep through your heart. I was shamed. I looked at myself and wondered who the real monster was."

Scott felt sick to his stomach. "You...just because I let you live didn't make me less a monster. Don't make excuses for my behavior."

"Then don't make excuses for my past deeds either." Deucalion snapped. His voice softened a second later. "Capture-bonding is quite common in wolf packs, my feelings of empathy for you, the abuser, is part of it—but I know what I'm saying is true as well. We were both monsters. We both hurt the other in different ways."

Scott didn't know how to respond. So he sat there, absorbing Deucalion's words and realized at some point he had started crying.

"I admit that the fault is mainly mine, not yours. I brought this all on myself," Deucalion continued, like if he stopped he would never have another chance to speak. "I destroyed you and you _healed_ me, took away my darkness." His voice wavered and the older man hastily wiped at his eyes. "I realized that I had to let go of my anger, that it was nothing more than wounded pride. I was finally able acknowledge your pain for the first time when I did. I—I'm so sorry."

Silence consumed both men and they sat for awhile, too immersed in their own thoughts. Scott at last realized what he wanted to say.

"It's odd," he remarked. "I never blamed you." Deucalion released a long breath, the sound hitching at the end.

"Typical."

"So when you came to me that night," Scott recalled, "in the warehouse and called yourself mine for the first time, that was..."

"Me coming to my own conclusions," Deucalion confirmed. "I realized my place and where I was needed most. I also discovered how much I could care for you and what you represented to me."

"I find it hard to believe me almost killing you made you realize you should _care_ for me." Scott tried to keep the bitterness out of his voice, but it didn't work. He had spent months attempting to get Deucalion's acceptance before realizing himself how futile it was, how broken he had become. Maiming Deucalion should _not_ have brought out feelings of compassion for Scott. "Did you even think there was anything worth saving?" He remembered their first few months. His pack had slaughtered countless others and he'd been cruel to even his own, Deucalion especially.

"Of course." Something that was almost a smile came to the man's face. "You may have discarded your humanity, but you kept it close to you."

It took a second for Scott to realize what he was talking about. "You mean Derek?"

"You never once hurt him. That knowledge, as well as your own determination and stubbornness to be...better. It was all the hope I needed to start reaching out to you. I didn't mind as much when you lashed out after that. In some way, the physical pain you unleashed upon me felt like retribution, like I was paying for my sins."

"That's a drastically unhealthy way to look at how I abused you," Scott said bluntly. "B-but I think I understand." He looked at his hands. "The more of everybody's pain I took on, even though I felt like I was breaking, it also felt...appropriate? I dunno, I was pretty out it of. I just didn't want anyone to die."

"And no one did."

Scott rubbed at his chest gingerly. "And now I feel hollow."

"I felt like that too," Deucalion agreed, "once I realized what I'd done to you and to myself. Sometimes I still feel like that."

Scott went over the past several years again in his mind, conclusion unchanging. "It doesn't matter in the end _how_ I came to be like this, I shouldn't be forgiven for my actions. They were mine, not yours. No matter what you say I still did all those horrible things, I killed so many people."

"Then I can't be forgiven either," Deucalion argued.

"But I hurt you. Y-you paid your price." It was a weak argument.

"And I hurt you. Scott—Alpha, there is no winner in this competition. We both lost our way and wounded countless people in the process. Destroying lives with actions that cannot be taken back, but that doesn't have to mean it's over."

Scott took another moment to come to terms with the emptiness inside himself. It didn't bother him much, there were no dark thoughts to suppress nor anger to make him lash out. Perhaps hollow was the wrong word.

_You are not alone._

Scott blinked again as his world blurred and chest burned. He was still crying; tears falling even faster than before. He scrubbed a hand across his face and tried to stop. Stupid; he had been so _stupid_. The answer had been right in front of him this entire time. Deucalion had said those words to him before, why did he only now realize it?

"Sc—" Deucalion stopped suddenly, face torn with conflicted emotions of worry, but fear of reacting. Wolves were partial to physically comforting others and it had to hurt to deny that instinct, but Scott had been the one to beat that into him. He had to change that; _he_ had to change.

"You can call me Scott," he said.

"You—you don't mind?" Deucalion's voice was small. "You're the alpha, it's in your right."

Scott shot up from the bed. "Am I?"

"Of course, you're—"

"No, but," Scott touched his chest, "I think I gave too much." Deucalion stilled next to him. "My blood literally turned black. I—I don't think I'm an alpha anymore."

"No, you are. You have to be." The older wolf gripped Scott's arm tight. "Scott, turn. Try it now, please."

Scott paused, not wanting to shift. Derek had told him what had happened to Cora, how in order to save her life he would have given everything and lost his alpha status. Of course, since Peter had been telling Derek to do it the older boy hadn't believed him and she had died. Scott healed five wolves, three from the brink of death. The very fact that he was alive was miraculous.

"I was able to heal," he whispered. "I thought I couldn't, but I did. Don't you think that's enough? The fact I can still take away other's pain. You told me—"

"I assumed, but I was wrong. You're no demon wolf, you're nothing like me." Deucalion seemed to realize he was touching Scott and quickly let go. Scott looked at his arm, it felt cold now. He hadn't really minded Deucalion's touch. "Please, just let me see your eyes."

"Why is it so important to you? It would be better if I wasn't an alpha anymore."

"No, you need to be."

"I think you're wrong. Power only made me—" Deucalion cut him off by leaning forward and clamping his mouth around Scott's neck. It was more of a nip, not even breaking the skin, but all of Scott's instincts kicked in. For a second all he knew was red as his eyes turned a deep crimson. He felt as his teeth sank into the soft flesh of Deucalion's neck and the tang of blood splashed across his tongue. When he came back to himself, he'd somehow grabbed Deucalion and twisted them around so the man was underneath him on the hospital bed. Scott immediately pulled back, fangs disappearing and a hand flying to cover his mouth.

"I-I'm so sorry." But the older wolf only looked relieved, panting lightly from where he lay, and readjusting his glasses from their skewed state. Scott dropped his hand, confused. "But I don't understand..."

"You're a true alpha, Scott." Deucalion sat up, buttoned shirt torn at the collar exposing his neck, jacket laying askew on his shoulders. Deucalion's disheveled state distracted Scott once again and he felt heat rise to his cheeks as the man underneath him licked his lips. "Your power comes from yourself, therefore, I-I think you generate your own spark. The rest of us are dependent on the power we stole from another. It's just a guess, though."

"I—" Scott was at a loss. He'd been fully prepared to die. He had no plan anymore, didn't know what to do next. "How do you keep going? What do I do now?" He sounded like such a child. "Can I even make up for what I've done?"

"Scott..." He could sense Deucalion's want to touch him, to try and comfort in whatever way he could. "Scott, I don't know if redemption is something that can be obtained or given or earned, I don't have that answer, but I think it's worth trying. You have to start somewhere. Saving your entire pack isn't a bad place to start you...you did this— _you_."

"I-I just— _god_. Is that enough?" Scott choked out, not meeting the other's hidden gaze. "I don't know what to do."

"Scott," Deucalion's hand brushed across his own, voice low and earnest, "look at me."

"Why?"

"Please." Scott glanced up, surprised when the older man reached up to take off his glasses.

"D-did they heal alright? Your eyes, I just didn't want you to have to be completely blind when you were recovering." Deucalion gave a sad smile.

"I told you, remember? I destroyed you, while you _healed_ me—" He removed the dark shades and Scott was met with not red, or even a milky color, but piercing blue eyes, overly bright and a little wet, reflecting too many emotions. The young man gaped, his mind taking a second to catch up.

"You can see." Stating the painfully obvious was something he hadn't done in a long time, but he couldn't get much else out. Scott reached up without thought and ran his fingers lightly over the other's face. "What happened? _How_ did this happen?"

"You." Deucalion leaned into his touch.

"I did that?" Scott frowned. "I don't think that's possible. When we take away pain all we're doing is speeding up the natural healing process. N-nothing like this."

"You've always been special." Deucalion leaned harder until Scott cupped his cheek. His hands dropped to dig into the white sheets of the bed. "But I was shocked too, if it helps."

"I did this?" Scott tried to blink away his own tears. "I healed you?"

"In more ways than one."

Scott felt the weight of those words settle over him. This time it felt good, like it was holding him down, keeping him grounded. Not suffocating like the darkness had been but sturdy and safe. He felt something fill his hollow chest then, warm and fluttery. Scott felt his breathing grow short as he recognized the sensation.

"I'm not alone." It floored him and Scott felt a smile begin to form. "I'm _not_ alone," he whispered again. A low growl vibrated through his hand as Deucalion agreed, Scott still holding him, but his blue eyes wanting. Pain blossomed in Scott's chest and he ached for more, pulling Deucalion closer and bringing their lips together in a slow kiss. It was shy and uncertain, a brief brush of skin that felt like a jolt of electricity. Deucalion froze and Scott gasped, both their eyes meeting in the silence. Scott's heart hammered loudly in his ears and he swallowed thickly as he tried to keep his hand from shaking.

There were no more lies, no more darkness between them. Just what was right here.

Scott's eyes finally closed and he released a shaky breath, which spluttered as Deucalion's lips caressed his again. They were chapped and a little dry but Scott answered eagerly, happiness welling up in his chest. A small moan slipped out. Deucalion shuddered against him at that and melted completely into Scott, pressing against the young man urgently. It wasn't a battle for dominance, just reassurance and a desperate need to connect.

Scott took Deucalion's bottom lip in his teeth, biting down lightly and causing the man's jaw to go slack and his mouth to part. He made small noises that drove Scott wild as his tongue swept through Deucalion's mouth. A much louder growl came from Deucalion this time, ending in a small whine as his hands clenched in the sheets underneath them. Scott felt a pang of longing. He wanted intimacy and, for the first time in years, he could finally ask for it. He broke the kiss briefly. "Please, please touch me."

Deucalion paused for a moment as his eyes met Scott's again, sharp and searching as if he had just realized something. Without warning, the man grabbed Scott's lower back, pulling the young man flush against his body and renewed their kiss with a hunger, one hand sliding up along Scott's back while the other went lower. Scott yelped embarrassingly, having never been kissed in such a way before, with such devotion. He tried to hold on for as long as possible but the kiss felt so close to something more—something like _love_ —and he let out a sob, burying his head in Deucalion's shoulder, overwhelmed and feeling truly safe for the first time in years.

Deucalion gripped him tight, his hands shaking as well as he leaned back against the headboard with Scott curled tight around him. The two stayed that way long into the night.

 

* * *

 

When Deucalion went out and fetched the rest of the pack, Derek practically threw himself at Scott, pressing their foreheads together so hard it almost hurt.

"I knew you'd pull through. You had to," the older boy breathed against him and ran his hands through Scott's hair. He let Derek scent him out, bringing him into a firm hug.

"Sorry to scare you," Scott said to the entire pack.

Kali huffed as she crossed her arms. "I wasn't worried. I knew as soon as you got some blood in you, your healing abilities would kick in. Honestly, Alpha, you shouldn't have spent so much energy in fixing us up, you would have been fine otherwise."

"That's Kali's way of thanking you," Ethan replied. Both twins hovered close to the door, faces apprehensive and cautious.

"Yeah, I know." Scott gave a small smile to ease their worry. "Thank you for your help. The others probably wouldn't have made it without you two."

"I-I don't know if I'd go that far." Aiden shifted his shoulders, uncomfortable at the praise. His eyes darted between Scott and the floor, heartbeat faster than normal as a blush rose to his face.

"You look different, Alpha," Ethan noted and took a small step inside.

"He almost died, of course he looks different," Kali pointed out but Derek frowned and studied Scott critically

"No, you do look a bit different."

"What I want to know is why we were even attacked in the first place," Kali inserted and both she and Derek glared at each other. Scott raised a hand and they quieted.

"I'll, uh, try to explain the best I can." And then spent the next hour going over his conversation with Akh. He didn't mention the part where he'd traveled back to the Between Realm the Nenetom ritual seemed to have tethered his soul to, but framed it as though it was part of the conversation he and Akh had before their fight. Deucalion chipped in, adding his support or expanding upon a fact.

His eyes met Scott's though, curiosity very clear in them. He had heard the actual conversation, and Scott knew he would have to explain himself later.

The pack took it as well as Scott expected them to.

"Right, he just happened to know _all_ this stuff off the top of his head?" Ethan's eye roll was impressive.

"His plan was moronic," Kali said. "Even if we suppose he's telling the truth, he sacrificed himself to ' _save_ ' Scott while nearly killing everyone in the process, _including_ the boy he claimed to be rescuing!"

"What if we had died?" Derek's entire body was shaking in rage. "I doubt Scott would have simply been fine if his entire pack had been slaughtered. Trying to save you, my ass. He was a selfish dick."

"To be fair," Aiden said, "it _did_ work. The, um, 'darkness' in Scott seems gone. At least that's why I think everyone is perceiving you differently. Even your scent's a bit unusual."

"That might just be all the antiseptic," Scott said. His pack continued to squabble amongst themselves over the finer points of dark rituals and if Akh had been acting for a greater good or just been completely batshit crazy. Scott listened to it peacefully, enjoying the background noise of his wolves. He'd almost lost all of this. A pressing thought came to mind. "Uh," his head snapped up, "what happened with Akh's pack and the Urgent Care center? Are the authorities looking for suspects?"

"Oh that." Derek shook his head. "It's all good."

"That white wolf didn't return to human form," Kali explained. "People think it was a cult ritual. That Akh's pack were worshipers of the White Wolf legend and tried to bring a wolf into the city and it broke out, killing everyone. All the injuries point to an animal attack so they're not looking for human suspects. They're just worried there were two wolves and that the other is still on the loose. Because—"

"We're tourists and you were attacked by a runaway dog on your morning jog. Not the best story but they believed it anyways." Derek finished.

"Being able to pay for the hospital bill helped," Deucalion added.

"As for the Urgent Care center, we burned it down," Aiden said.

" _Wh-what?_ " Scott tried to remain composed.

"We pulled the employees out!" Aiden hastily amended. "It's just that there was blood everywhere and it would have been impossible to clean up, so we just torched it. People think it was vandalized."

"So...we're good?" Scott asked.

"Yeah, it's all been taken care of." Derek put his hand on Scott's knee.

"As soon as you've healed, Alpha, we'll leave," Kali asserted.

"Where will we go then?" Ethan asked and Scott hung his head, unsure.

"I—" He still had no plans. Just to keep his pack safe, maybe finally settle somewhere. He was sick of violence.

"Perhaps back to America?" Deucalion suggested gently. "You've been away for quite awhile. Familiar landscapes might help?" Scott did miss their forests. While Europe's was beautiful in its own way, there was something about America's that felt comfortable and safe.

"Yeah." He nodded. "Just, maybe stick to the east coast for now. Don't know how safe the west coast is."

"Agreed."

"Think you guys could check me out of here?" Scott raised his arms, wincing but knowing his healing abilities would take care of that soon. "I kinda just wanna go back to the hotel and rest." His pack almost fell over themselves in their rush to accommodate his request. Derek called for the doctor.

It was much later in the day when Scott collapsed in his own bed at their hotel. Five star inns were really something else, one day he'd ask where Deucalion got all his money from. The young alpha curled deeper into the blankets, pausing when he heard Derek and Deucalion arguing by the door.

Deucalion clenched his jaw, eyes narrowed, barring the other man from coming in. "Derek, he's tired."

"You think I don't know?" Derek glared at him. "I don't want to talk to him, just comfort."

"You think that'll help?"

"Don't give me that, like I can't smell him all over you. He actually let you touch him, didn't he? Well, I've always had permission. Now it's my turn, he's my alpha as well. It's not like you two are mates."

At Deucalion's growl Scott swore loudly and silenced both wolves, flinching from their alpha's displeasure. The younger man could almost see them tuck their tails in at being caught quarrelling over him. "Derek can come in," Scott murmured. Derek pushed past Deucalion and made for Scott's bed, pulling off his shoes and socks on the way.

"You ok?" he asked, sliding in next to Scott.

"Just exhausted," Scott answered honestly, feeling Derek wrap an arm around his chest and pull the young man closer. Deucalion stepped over to his own bed and Scott could sense his hurt pride, but Derek had been right. He and Deucalion had spent awhile alone before the rest of the pack had been allowed in. "Thank you for understanding," he breathed out. Scott took a deep breath, filled with his pack-mate's scents, before drifting off to sleep.

Scott woke the next morning to the sound of water. He blinked and sat up, Derek still tucked close to him. The shower. Deucalion's bed was empty and Scott looked at the clock, noting it was only seven in the morning. He dragged himself out of bed, careful not to wake Derek and made for the bathroom.

"Is it alright if I come in?" Scott asked from the doorway.

"Oh—erm, yes. Of course." Deucalion pulled the shower curtain back, Scott's eyes immediately drawn up to his blue ones, still unused to them. The man made a motion to make room for him, but Scott sat down on the toilet seat.

"No, I just need to check my injuries." And he pointed to his bandages. Deucalion nodded briefly and Scott noticed the back of his neck turn red as he tried to busy himself with taking a shower again.

Scott smiled and unwrapped the gauze covering his arms with hesitant fingers, relieved to see only thin white lines running across his skin, the only evidence left from the deep gouges he originally had. Most people probably wouldn't even notice them. He moved to his chest, taking a deep breath and happy when he encountered no pain. Unfortunately his chest hadn't healed as well as his arms, rows of raised scars cut jagged across his torso, some crawling up past his collarbone close his neck and one long gash scraped over his hipbone. At least the lines were clean because of the stitches the doctors had given him. A human would have only have mottled skin left. Still...Scott rubbed a hand over the wound, sobering as he took in the disfigurement.

It's what he deserved.

A hand touched his arm and Scott jerked. Deucalion pulled back quickly, eyes wary. He had turned off the shower and wrapped a towel around his waist, bending down next to Scott. The young man had been so absorbed he hadn't noticed.

"S-sorry," Scott apologized, "you startled me, is all." He pointed at his ruined chest. "Didn't heal as well as I thought." His face fell as he touched the scars. "It'll take awhile to get used to."

"You're still beautiful," Deucalion assured him, hesitantly running a hand across Scott's chest. The teen felt his face flush.

" _Right_." Scott swiped at his nose in embarrassment, looking over at Deucalion's own scar branded into his shoulder. It always reminded him of a web, or shattered glass. "We all have our scars," he commented. Scott's eyes dropped to his bite mark on Deucalion's neck and he slowly traced it with his fingers. The older man underneath him gave a shudder, eyes flaring red.

"Some scars are worth it." Deucalion's voice was like gravel and Scott felt himself lean forward, fangs sliding out to claim what was his—

"Can I use the bathroom, please?" Derek asked from the door, leaning against the frame, eyes still full of sleep. Scott jumped back quickly as Deucalion groaned in frustration.

"Yeah, sure. Sorry, man." Scott hopped up and scooted away, making quickly for his bed. He was suddenly starving. Or maybe that was just nerves from the tension in the room.

Deucalion stood and walked out, growling threateningly at Derek who paid him no mind. Scott busied himself with getting dressed.

"I-I think I'm going to see if they've set breakfast out yet." Scott ignored the butterflies in his stomach as he pulled a shirt over his head. Deucalion sat back on his bed and gave an irritated sigh, his scent drenched in arousal. Scott glanced over, but the man's attention seemed focused inwards. Deucalion's skin was still damp, small droplets running down his chest. Scott's eyes followed and he felt his pulse quicken and turned away; yeah, maybe he was a little sexually frustrated too.

Scott slid out into the hallway and made his way down to the dining area, pressing the call button for the elevator. He looked down at his shoes, mind in turmoil. Finally, he was free from the darkness that had trapped him for so long inside his own body. His mind was released from the poisonous wrath that had choked him to the point of breaking. It felt amazing, if a little disconcerting. Like having too much space after getting used to a cage.

It had been such a long time since Scott had been himself that he felt like a stranger in his own body. He wanted intimacy and friendship again, but his social skills were appalling after years spent being a ruthless tyrant. He didn't know how to become the boy he had once been. Was it even possible?

The elevator dinged open and Scott stepped in, groaning as he tried to wrap his head around everything. The doors slid shut and Scott startled as an arm jammed it's way in at the last minute. Deucalion pulled the doors open, face flushed.

"Apologies. I just-I just wanted to catch up to you." He ambled in and Scott couldn't decide if this was better or worse than before. To say the silence was awkward would be an understatement.

"Is everything alright between you and Derek?" Scott winced. There had to be a better way of saying that.

"Of course," Deucalion said far too professionally. The younger wolf squinted and heard the other's heartbeat steady out as it always did when he lied.

"Do you realize," Scott started, "that your heartbeat has a natural quirk to it?"

"Does it?" Deucalion seemed genuinely surprised.

"Yeah, it gives an odd double beat occasionally. It's very distinctive. You probably can't feel it but I can pick it out easily now."

"Oh."

"Mmmhmm." Scott nodded. "It completely disappears when you steady your heartbeat during a lie, though."

"Ah." And Deucalion's heartbeat skyrocketed in panic and Scott had to bite back a smile. "Well, that's troublesome."

"For you." Scott reached over and pressed the emergency stop button. The man next to him tensed and he turned to face Deucalion. "I'm serious, are you and Derek going to keep at this?"

"It's a petty thing, Scott." Deucalion sighed, eyes averted. "And he and I both know it." Scott gazed harder, still unused to the blue eyes and really appreciating the color. He realized he probably was staring too hard when Deucalion bent his head lower to show his neck. The younger wolf stepped back quickly.

"Sorry," he apologized. "It's just, I'd rather you two not fight. You're both important to me."

"I understand." Yet Deucalion still wouldn't meet his eyes.

"Do you?" Scott's voice grew deep, a vein in the older wolf's neck twitched and Scott held back the urge to bite this time. "You don't look sure. Why are you two even fighting, I—" A thought hit Scott and he stopped. Deucalion's eyes finally snapped up to his, blue meeting brown. "It's because of this, right?" Scott gestured between the two of them. "This...whatever we have. Yeah?"

"I told you, it's petty."

"It's because I've changed?" He didn't mean for it to sound bitter, but that's how the words came out.

"No—yes." Deucalion gave up lying and drew closer to the young man. "Yes, I'm sorry. I just, you're vulnerable and my instinct says to protect, even from the rest of the pack."

"You sure that's it?" Scott wasn't backing down.

"No, it's more." Deucalion's scent changed as he said the words. He tilted his head more, neck exposed in his collared shirt. "Am I still yours?" He sounded so unsure that Scott blinked, confused.

"Why would that have changed?" he asked.

"Because _you_ have," Deucalion emphasized and the muscles in his neck tensed. "Who you were before...that boy I first met, he wouldn't have—"

"But I'm not him," Scott interrupted. "Too much time has passed and even without the darkness I'm not that boy anymore. The Scott McCall you first met died that night, I can't ever be him again. I just have to start over, I think." He hadn't given it too much thought, mainly because he'd had no time as of yet, but the words felt right.

"I understand." This time Deucalion did sound like it, but his face was closed off.

"But..." Scott prompted.

"Do you need to start over with everything?" They both knew what 'everything' entailed. Scott knew his answer.

"Definitely." He grabbed the older man's shirt and pulled him in for a fervent kiss, lips crashing against each others. Deucalion froze only for an instant before returning the kiss with an urgent desperation, hands immediately going to Scott's back before clenching the fabric of his shirt. Scott pushed him against the elevator wall, swiping his tongue over chapped lips and Deucalion opened his mouth with a long moan. They battled for a moment, lost to passion, but control was surrendered to Scott almost instantly and he ravaged the man underneath him.

Deucalion pushed back, eager as a low growl slipped from him and he slid his hands down to Scott's hips, rolling them closer together and grinding against the younger man. Scott gasped as he felt the heat spark between them and let out a whine. Deucalion shuddered against him at the noise. Scott brought his hand up to cup the back of the Deucalion's head, running his fingers through coarse hair, and tilting it to get better access to his mouth. They kissed like that for several minutes until Scott had to pull back for air, panting. Deucalion put his head on Scott's shoulder breathing just as hard, eyes overly bright.

"If this is going to work," Scott whispered, "then yeah, we have to start over. Is that ok?"

"Yes, quite." Deucalion's breath tickled his collarbone and Scott dipped his head to brush his teeth against the other wolf's neck. The man underneath trembled and let out a whine. "I'm yours still?"

Scott rubbed a finger at the bite mark. "That's up to you now."

Scott was asking now, not demanding or forcing Deucalion to submit. It was entirely up to him and the older man knew it.

" _I want this_." It sounded like a prayer. A willful and eager prayer as Deucalion's eyes met Scott's, clear and knowing exactly what he had said. He was trembling, Scott felt it through his body, his knees especially. Scott's own blood pounded through his body, Deucalion wanted to kneel, wanted to be under Scott as he claimed him. Heat and desire coiled tightly in Scott's stomach as he took in a ragged breath. The air was thick with the spice of Deucalion's scent.

Scott's fangs slid out on their own accord, his eyes a dark red and Deucalion stretched his neck in anticipation. A whine slipped from him and Scott pulled back suddenly and he resisted biting down. "There's a camera in here." He paused. "Later, then."

They pulled apart, although it was very reluctantly. Scott released the elevator and it continued its path downwards. He scented the air and realized it smelled like lust and his face started to burn.

"Are you...?" Deucalion shot him a look. The doors dinged open and Scott hopped off.

"We got a bit carried away," he admitted and scratched the back of his head, hoping no one would go into the elevator for awhile. Even humans could smell pheromones that strong in the air.

"Did we?" And the older man quirked an eyebrow. Scott blinked, unaware Deucalion had the ability to sass. The younger man quickly looked away, blush intensifying. By the time they got to the breakfast buffet, Scott wasn't too hungry any more. At least not for food.

 

* * *

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was co-beta'd by Stately_Demented and underwater-smiles! Go check out their respective pages here: http://archiveofourown.org/users/Stately_Demented/pseuds/Stately_Demented and https://www.fanfiction.net/u/3516421/

* * *

Time passed and though the wounds Akh had given to Scott healed quickly, the psychological scars of his own darkness stayed deeply etched in his mind. He kept himself indoors most days, mind almost lethargic in its freedom and unsure of what to do, simply staring into the sky from his window and watching the world pass by. Deucalion and Derek stayed close to him, the entire pack retreated upon itself in his weakness and stopped going out, guarding their alpha.

Deucalion had them leave Africa as quickly as possible. They took a plane back to the states and landed somewhere in Michigan, heading north until they located a mid-sized town and settled down. Scott was hesitant to do much more, waiting until he got a grasp on the supernatural activity and hunter movements in the east and west coasts. His uncertainty echoed through the rest of the pack; Kali became restless, the twins nervous, Derek edgy, and Deucalion over-protective. It was a bad state of mind to be in and Scott found himself pacing most days, nauseously thinking of all the possible ways everything could go wrong.

For Scott the whole process was unsettling and strange. He was trying to find himself again, that young man he had been before. The person who put his friends first, who bore the responsibility of other lives seemingly easily, the boy who played games with monsters that looked human and _won_. Scott McCall who ran like the wind during lacrosse games, who inhaled knowledge as quickly as possible, who had outmaneuvered Gerard and defeated Peter. He desperately wished to find that boy again.

But...the strain of his isolation took a toll on the pack. They smothered him in their concern and Scott didn't know how to react anymore. Deucalion rarely left his side and the others were always close by—Derek constantly brought Scott food, to the point where just the smell of it made Scott throw up. Kali had become more aggressive and had started to assert her authority over the twins, aggravating Deucalion and straining tensions further.

Scott _needed_ to be alone.

They couldn't understand. How could they? Scott didn't even know how to put into words what he was feeling. The darkness was gone, but in its place a kernel of guilt grew. When Scott was around his pack he could only think of his past deeds and the monster he had become while leading them. Sometimes, when he looked at Deucalion, all Scott could think about was how much he'd hurt the other, of how much pain he had caused and the sound of his screams.

In those moments, Scott knew he'd deserved to die.

Deucalion was going through his own issues, readjusting to having his sight again after more than ten years of living in darkness. Most of the times he was with Scott they would sit in silence, both wrapped up in their own thoughts, and Deucalion would simply stare at people or streets, at books or the crappy wallpaper in their room, at his hands or Scott...mostly Scott. He would forget to blink and still seemed unused to sunlight, having worn his glasses near constantly.

One morning when Scott came out of the shower, mind not particularly focused on anything, he'd nearly had a heart attack at finding Deucalion sitting on his bed crying, one of Scott's books in his hands. He'd been so startled and confused Scott had thought they were under attack, or something horrible had happened until Deucalion explained otherwise. It was the first time he had read a book by sight in over a decade.

He'd been in such an emotional state it had pulled Scott out of his own misery and the day had been spent listening to Deucalion read to him, feeling content for a few hours. There were so many things Scott didn't know about Deucalion, and he wasn't sure exactly what the man was going through, being given back a sense that had been deprived of him for so long. So Scott let Deucalion relearn at his own pace, unsure of how to help anyways.

More important than anything, Scott needed to keep his authority. His pack was suffering because he was a weak alpha right now and, regardless of position, his status would be challenged soon. It was only natural and meant to keep the pack strong. The weak could not be allowed to rule. Scott had noticed Kali's restlessness, had sensed her eyes on him constantly. She was lashing out right now at their omega's because it was safe and could be done without too many repercussions (Deucalion would only take so much before defending the twins from her), but she would eventually aim for a higher target. Scott had to get himself under control soon and be commanding, but without resorting to cruelty like last time.

The only wolf he could think of who had managed that was Talia, but his situation was hardly similar.

"What type of alpha was Talia?" Scott asked Deucalion early one morning, having woken from a nightmare. The sun hadn't even risen yet. They were both still in their separate beds, but whenever Scott awoke so did Deucalion.

"Why not ask Derek?" There was no jealousy in his voice, only genuine interest.

"She was also his mother, it's different."

"And that's where you're wrong," Deucalion chuckled. "Talia handled her parental duties the same way she did her alpha ones. It was a strength although...it may have hurt her family more than she realized, in the long run. It's hard to say."

"Do you want me to ask Derek instead?" Scott asked.

"No, it's fine." Deucalion cut him off quickly. "I was simply curious. She..." He paused and seemed to be considering. "She was very calculated, always weighing and judging her options and the people around her. There was never a rash decision. She was strong, amazingly strong. Graceful. If there was something she wanted, she took it. She knew what she liked and what she didn't. To be fair, she was on a completely different level than other alphas."

Scott blinked. "Did you love her?" He watched as the older wolf's features twisted, looking pained and regretful.

"Yes."

Scott's mind continued to process the information. "You loved _Derek's_ mom..."

"She already had a mate, I never entertained any illusions."

"You still sound bitter."

"Only in the cowardly way she was taken, not in her mate. He was a good man, very understanding of our ways, for a human."

"Wait—wolves can have a human become their mate?" Scott asked, although it suddenly made sense why Derek had said his family had been a mixture of wolves and humans.

"Of course. Some more mainstream packs even insist upon it. Humans are spared the heat and a few other things that wolves have a weakness to, but there are, of course, downsides as well." Deucalion's eyes met Scott's. "In the end, what I felt for her didn't—doesn't matter." The older man's breathing evened out and Scott could feel the other studying him. "Why is this so important? You are your own alpha."

"No longer a good alpha." Scott huffed. "Pretty sure Kali's gonna attack me soon." Deucalion stayed quiet and it confirmed Scott's suspicion.

"Her claws would never reach you."

"Because of you?"

"Yes." His voice was dark. "I told you I would protect you from the rest of the pack if need be. Adjusting from light to darkness is easy, I've found the other way around is much harder. You simply need time. It might not feel like it, but you _will_ find your footing again as an alpha. Until then, I will deal with the others."

It was almost an afterthought, but it came to Scott nonetheless. "You make a really good beta." The other wolf was still in the bed next to his.

"I am yours," Deucalion responded as if that were an answer. Scott suddenly felt cold and shivered, pulling the comforter up more. He wanted...Scott sat up and swept the covers back, his heart pounding. Deucalion tensed. "I—" He jerked up as Scott swung his legs over the bed and stood, stepping to the other man's bed and sinking down.

"This okay?" he asked Deucalion, the wolf mutely nodded, eyes wide. Scott slid underneath the covers and laid down next to him, not touching, but closer than they'd been in awhile. It was only the second time the two had shared a bed.

"You..." Deucalion truly seemed lost for words, although his heart was racing to match Scott's and his scent had changed. "Yes." He didn't move closer, as if afraid to break what was happening. Scott reminded himself that he was the alpha and had to make the dominate moves. The young man scooted closer, reaching a hand out and brushing across the other's bare body underneath the covers. He met taunt muscles that quivered where he touched.

"If I'm making you uncomfortable..." Scott trailed off, but left his hand where it was. His fingers tapped lightly against Deucalion's lower abdomen, smile pulling at his face.

Deucalion blew out a harsh breath. "No, definitely _not_ —I just, I haven't pushed because I wanted to wait until you were ready. You haven't been in the best mindset..."

Scott sighed "I know. But you've wanted this for a long time." The older wolf didn't answer, but he didn't have to. His body said enough. The younger alpha pushed away any lingering doubts and moved quickly, rolling on top of Deucalion and straddling him. The effect was instantaneous, Scott could feel Deucalion grow hard against him and the man's strangled gasp became a low moan. He bucked up against Scott, fingers clenched in the sheets.

"Scott—" Deucalion cut himself off as said young werewolf ground his hips down against the other. "Yes! God, yes I've wanted this— _you_ since we kissed." Scott grabbed the man's wrists and pinned them above his head with one hand, leaning down and ghosting his breath across rigid nipples.

"I've denied you for too long." His voice dropped an octave. "Sorry, I'll fix that now." He latched on to one of the raised nubs and sucked hard, Deucalion buckling underneath him at the feeling, as Scott swirled his tongue around, nipping and playing until the skin turned red and oversensitive. He pulled an erect nipple in his teeth and drew the flesh up until he could see Deucalion teeter between pain and pleasure. He clenched harder, until the man underneath him started moaning, before releasing the nub and watched as it became flushed, glistening with his saliva. Scott tweaked the other with his finger, nail flicking and scraping against the delicate skin. He admired the swollen red flesh, scratching across both nipples and grinned as Deucalion growled in pleasure at the pain. Scott licked both in an apology, dragging his tongue slowly and eliciting a harsh whine from the man underneath him. His arms strained against Scott's hand, but the young alpha held firm.

An endless litany of begging and encouragement from Deucalion kept Scott going, certain he wasn't causing unwanted pain in his partner. It was so freeing, to be able to do so without battling horrible, violent urges from the darkness. Scott almost lost himself in pleasuring Deucalion, so happy to be able to worship the body beneath him.

As Scott continued his oral ministrations, mouthing at solid muscle and trembling flesh, his free hand slid lower and ran down hard stomach muscles, scratching lightly and twirling in circles, refusing to go lower. Deucalion gasped for breath, choking out a frustrated groan, back arched sharply in pleasure as he strained to get more friction. Scott teased more, trailing his tongue down until he was kissing the rough bronze curls nestled between Deucalion's legs, ignoring the trembling erection next to his face. He looked up and met the other man's eyes, bright red, and Scott carefully brushed lips across the head of his cock and heard as Deucalion made a broken sound, hips jolting up and Scott was forced to pull back.

"I could keep playing with you like this," he purred, a feeling of playfulness coming out of nowhere. Happy? Was this what it felt like? He ran a finger across a dusky nipple. Deucalion's breath came out ragged and his hips jerked involuntarily, almost too sensitive after all of the rough stimulation. His crimson eyes had started to glow, arousal peaking. "Unless it's too much?" Their gazes finally met and Scott only saw longing in the other's face, barely restrained and on the brink of collapsing. It hit Scott hard in the gut and he felt his own erection tighten in wanting.

"I _need_ you." The words sounded ripped from Deucalion's throat, as if he could barely string together the sentence and Scott couldn't tell if that was an answer or not. " _Alpha_." The raw desire laced through that deep voice nearly sent him over the edge and Scott's breath caught in his throat. The primal part of his mind fervent to claim a wanting submissive.

" _Deucalion_ —" The man moaned at his name, but Scott cut him off with a searing kiss, lips crashing down and dominating. Messy and more teeth than anything else, but the wolf underneath groaned loudly and licked greedily at Scott's mouth. Scott used his free hand to grip the other's hair and pulled back. His vision flickered and reddened with power, his beta whined at the display. " _Mine_ ," Scott growled and sunk his fangs in deep into the offered neck.

"Scott— _fuck!_ " Deucalion cried, apparently unprepared to be claimed just then and he shuddered, writhing underneath the younger man. For once there was no pain in Deucalion's voice, only overwhelming pleasure as he tried to pull himself back from the brink of orgasm.

This is what Scott craved now.

He clamped down further and the older wolf gritted his teeth and held back another scream, his cock leaking steadily and twitching against Scott's stomach. The young man realized that this was the first time he'd truly claimed Deucalion as his since the whole ordeal with the white wolf. Since he had changed.

" _Scott please, if you keep biting I'll_ —" Scott got the message and unclenched his jaw. Deucalion drew a ragged breath, so close to orgasm that he couldn't stop shaking. He gave a low whine and Scott moved back up to ravish Deucalion's mouth, slow and sensual, pulling him back from the brink.

"Still mine. Always mine," he reassured his beta.

" _Yes_ ," the man murmured against Scott's skin as his body calmed down. The younger alpha ran his hand through the other's hair, relishing in the feeling. He finally pulled back slightly, hand sliding lower before brushing against Deucalion's neglected cock. The older man inhaled sharply but nodded, biting his lip in anticipation. Scott stared, entranced and licked his own lips in response, before firmly stroking the man below him, tight and measured. Deucalion's body spasmmed and his breath shorted out, arms pulling again against Scott's restraining hand.

The younger man curled his fingers and started to massage the burning erection, rubbing two fingers across the head, playing with the slit, and smearing the come dribbling out over his hand. His rhythm deliberately slow with enough force to make Deucalion squirm and pant, but just on the edge of what he needed to find release. His hand moved at a tortuous pace as Scott increased his pressure, fingers like a vice as they dragged up. Scott dipped his head, delving his tongue past the other's lips, but Deucalion was too far gone to return the gesture, barely able to whimper and moan as Scott's hand and tongue engulfed him.

With every strong stroke, Scott could feel Deucalion draw closer, every pull wringing more come, every twist of his fingers pushing the man closer to the brink. Scott slid his hand lower and pushed a finger against Deucalion's entrance, causing the older wolf to cry out into his mouth. His hips stuttered up, demanding more and rubbing against Scott's erection. He yelped and jerked back, having forgotten about his own needs. The moment temporarily broken, Scott took a calming breath as Deucalion gasped for air underneath, body drenched in sweat and muscles trembling.

Scott knew he'd always been on the wrong side of pain for Deucalion, pushing just past his limit for pleasure. On the right side, though, he had the older man whimpering and begging with need, cock hard and leaking against his thigh as Scott played his body perfectly.

"Y-you good to keep going?" Scott felt like he needed to ask, just because he'd never done so before. Deucalion gave him an incredulous look, gesturing with his eyes down to his throbbing erection, that Scott had to chuckle a little. He released Deucalion's arms so he could run his hands down the other's body, letting himself admire everything. "I always want you like this," he admitted and Deucalion tilted his head back, a tight noise coming from his throat and he groaned in agreement.

"I prefer you like this, too." Deucalion let one hand trail up to Scott's neck, cupping the back of his head and Scott blinked quickly as a warm feeling made its way through his chest. "Kind, eager, loving." Deucalion's voice was so rough in his arousal it was a bit distracting, but the honesty in it made Scott take a shuddering breath so he didn't start crying and ruin everything.

He slid his hands lower until they reached Deucalion's inner thighs, where he scratched his fingers lightly. Deucalion tried to continue, Scott saw the sincerity in his eyes. He wanted to comfort Scott, be there for him in more than a sexual manner, but at Scott's touch his careful control snapped and the moan he gave was so guttural and filthy that it sent Scott's blood rushing.

Hormones took over and clouded everything. His beta needed him. Scott growled and grabbed Deucalion's legs, throwing them around his waist, where they immediately wrapped tight and pulled the young man closer. He reached out blindly for the nightstand drawer, where the lube was and squirted out more than necessary in his haste.

His fingers found the man's entrance and he pushed two in without hesitation, scissoring and twisting within the heat. Deucalion growled and thrust his hips forward, silently asking for more. His growl choked off as Scott found his prostrate and dragged a blunt nail across it, the man nearly howled as his body convulsed, precome squirting from his cock. The younger alpha yelped as he suddenly found Deucalion in his arms, sitting in his lap as he fucked himself on Scott's fingers.

Scott wrapped his free hand around the other's back to steady him, then realized how intimate their position was. Deucalion's head was buried in the teen's neck and Scott could feel his hot breath across his chest as the man panted with need, keening every time Scott pushed against his spot, his arms clutching Scott's back and legs wrapped tightly around his waist. Scott licked at his bite mark on the other and Deucalion whimpered, body shuddering and Scott knew the other was getting close.

"Not yet," Deucalion whispered in his ear, as if reading Scott's mind. "Can't yet, need you— _want_ you inside of me. _Please_."

Scott finally moaned, Deucalion's words more powerful than his touch, and the young man wanted to come just from that. He withdrew his fingers and lined himself up. Lifting his hips to accommodate the other, he bit his lip as Scott slowly pushed in. The younger alpha watched as Deucalion slowly descended down on his length, filling him up inch by inch. Scott gasped as he was completely surrounded by Deucalion. He reached out and pulled his partner closer, feeling Deucalion tense around him and try to adjust.

"Tell me when you're ready," he whispered into the man's ear, nipping at the lobe. Deucalion's breath came out ragged and his arms tensed around Scott's back.

"Y-you don't have to wait—" the older wolf grunted, voice hitching as Scott shifted his hips.

"Yeah, I do." Scott peppered kisses along the man's jaw line. "I don't want to hurt you. I never want to hurt you again." Deucalion's back arched at his words, whining as he pressed his head against Scott's shoulder.

" _Scott_..." His voice was ruined with lust. "I-I meant, you don't have to wait because I—" He stuttered off, voice breaking with want and frustration and he slammed himself down on Scott, making the younger man see stars. Scott clenched down on the other's hips to stop him from doing that again as he waited for his head to clear, so close to coming it was painful to hold back. Deucalion didn't make things easier by whining and licking at Scott's neck.

"I-I can't go fast and hard," Scott admitted, "not in this position, b-but I like it. Being this close to you."

"Do whatever you want just _move_ ," Deucalion breathed against him, begging clear in his voice and Scott's hips shifted on their own accord, snapping up and setting a medium pace. Deucalion met him thrust for thrust, thigh muscles straining and using his position to make sure Scott hit his prostrate every time, whimpering into the young alpha's neck. Scott grinned as he took a hold of the man's erection and started stroking in time with their movements, swiping across the head and squeezing more precome for the tip. Deucalion nearly collapsed from the sensation, dropping hard against Scott as his legs started to tremble, using the distraction to speed up the pace, hammering hard against the other wolf and using all his strength to keep it up.

Deucalion moaned as Scott finally pounded into him, claws sliding out as he got closer. Pulling his alpha in for a powerful kiss, Deucalion left the young man breathless, balls clenching as he nearly hit the edge. Scott growled and surged forward, pinning Deucalion back down against the bed, grabbing his hips and using the new position to drive mercilessly into the other. The older wolf held nothing back, gritting his teeth trying to contain a scream as his hands clenched uselessly against Scott's back and his body thrashed in ecstasy. Scott used the last of his brain power and leaned forward, sinking his teeth deep into his beta's neck again and growling.

This time Deucalion did scream, come shooting so hard it splattered against his and Scott's chest. The younger man rode him through it all, freeing a hand so he could work the other's cock as it shuddered and milked him for everything he had. Only when he'd seen that Deucalion was thoroughly pleasured did Scott let himself release, crying out and falling against the older man's chest when he was done.

For several minutes both lay gasping for breath. Scott could feel tremors still running through Deucalion's body as the other tried to calm himself down, heart hammering against his ribcage. Scott dragged himself up so he was level with Deucalion, trailing his fingers across the man's features, and settled at his side.

"Worth the wait?" he asked, surprised at how rough his voice was. Deucalion huffed out a laugh then his eyes met Scott's.

"You've _no_ idea." He pulled Scott in for another kiss, simple and chaste, but the young man drank it in. They parted and Deucalion nuzzled against Scott's neck, scenting him out and Scott quirked an eyebrow.

"I'm probably drenched in your scent right now, so what're you doing that for?"

"I just...never thought you'd let me get this close," Deucalion answered softly. "Making sure this is real, is all." He stretched his neck out as he licked a long path across Scott's collarbone and the younger man's eyes drifted downwards.

"I like you wearing my mark." That slipped out unintended, but the blush and smile Scott got from the other was worth it. Deucalion unconsciously touched said bite mark gracing his skin and closed his eyes.

"I'm yours," he whispered and something hot and tight welled up in Scott's chest. He dragged Deucalion down for another kiss, falling asleep to feather light touches and soothing lips.

* * *

Scott woke, feeling like he was being pulled from a thick haze. Warmth surrounded him and he felt secure, protected. He opened his eyes to strong arms gripping tight across his chest and a faint breath tickling the back of his neck.

Scott contemplated their conversation earlier that day, reflecting on Deucalion's words of adjusting from dark to light, of taking time to find his footing as an alpha again. His beta might be confident about it, but Scott wasn't. The worry gnawed at him, probably stopping any real progress he might make to rediscover himself. Kali would eventually strike, it was in her nature and it was the right thing to do, a weak alpha could not lead this pack.

Not only was he weak, but his past sins—

"You're upset." Deucalion stirred next to him and licked gently at Scott's neck. "You needn't be, I'm here."

"I know," Scott replied, not mentioning that Deucalion was the focus for most of his guilt. "I'll get through this, my nerves are just getting the best of me." He sat up and pushed away his thoughts. Deucalion's arm fell back to curl around his waist and Scott chuckled. "Now that I'm letting you touch me, you're never letting go, are you?"

"Not likely." Deucalion agreed and pulled Scott closer to him. Scott ran a hand through the other's hair, enjoying the coarseness. He repeated the action again and smirked as Deucalion's eyes fell closed and he leaned into the touch, a deep growl that sounded close to a purr emanating from his chest. Scott's ears suddenly perked as the sounds of voices and dishes filtered through the walls.

"Everyone else is up," he commented and pulled away, standing up and looking for his clothes.

"We could stay in here for awhile longer," Deucalion suggested, watching Scott move around the room. The younger man paused in his actions and glanced over his shoulder with a shrewd grin.

"Possessive much?" he asked and directed his gaze to the bite mark gracing his beta's neck. Deucalion's eyes darkened with want.

"Have I ever not wanted you for myself?"

Scott thought back. "Good point." He found his jeans and shrugged them on. "Well, _I_ want breakfast, but you're welcome to stay in here for as long as you like." The old wolf huffed and made Scott smile wider. He grabbed his red hoodie and zipped it up, unsurprised when Deucalion rolled out of bed and followed him, searching for his own clothes. "Aren't you going to shower?" Scott asked, referencing their actions earlier that morning.

"I hadn't planned on it yet," Deucalion replied, unconcerned. Scott turned around and tried to keep his heartbeat steady and laughter silent, knowing exactly what this was. He was still wearing both Scott's marks across his body, the bite mark and his scent of sex. The wolf equivalent of showing off to the rest of the pack.

"Alright, but be nice to Derek. Don't start anything." Scott warned as they both headed downstairs. Aiden was at the counter, poking at something in the microwave, while the others were all gathered around the table drinking the coffee. Kali immediately looked up.

"You two got fucking busy this morning."

Deucalion made a beeline for the kettle sitting on the stove and ignored her as Derek sent him a calculated glance.

Scott yawned and stretched his arms. "Busy fucking, you mean." Ethan spit out his juice and started coughing. Kali burst out laughing and Scott was surprised at how easily the statement had come out, he hadn't even thought twice about how to deflect her. Deucalion sat down at the table, grabbing some tea packets along the way, and Scott didn't miss how red the back of his neck was. The older wolf might have wanted to show off he was still Scott's, but the younger man knew he'd been trying to do it a bit more discreetly. Yeah right, not with _this_ pack.

Scott moved towards the counter and started pulling out supplies for breakfast, having learned long ago he was the only one who could actually cook. Aiden sighed and gave up with whatever he'd been trying to heat up and threw it in the trash, looking hopefully at Scott. "I'll make enough for everyone." The younger alpha sighed and Aiden went back to the table where Kali was still snickering.

"If I'd known you two would be so noisy I wouldn't have picked the room next to yours." She gave a leer at Deucalion and he bared his teeth back at her. "I can't have been the only one to hear?"

"You weren't," Derek said darkly and Scott rolled his eyes. He busied himself with cracking eggs and cutting up sausage. "Was it really necessary to drench yourself in his scent before coming down?"

"Depends," Deucalion answered with deadly calm, "does it bother you much?" Both wolves started growling and Scott wanted to bang his head against the counter.

He sighed. " _What_ did I say?" Deucalion turned his head away and started pouring hot water into a teacup, his neck going red again at Scott's displeasure. Derek continued glaring and Scott knew the issue was going to keep coming up. He threw the sausages and eggs into the frying pan and turned his mind back to cooking.

"Do you need help, Alpha?" Ethan asked, probably sick of the tension at the table. Despite Scott having given his permission for the pack to use his real name, Aiden and Ethan continued to call him by his title. Deucalion had explained it was due to them having the lowest standing in the pack, alpha-omegas to put simply. It made sense, Scott supposed.

"Yeah Ethan," he replied, "there should be some sliced fruit in the fridge if you want to get it out." The other boy sprung up and ran to do it. Scott stirred at the food that was starting to sizzle, adding some pepper and ground spices.

Kali chuckled. "So domesticated."

"Look who's talking," Scott replied easily, "when's the last time you killed someone? You've gone soft." Aiden and Ethan both made ' _ooooh_ ' sounds behind him.

Kali raised an eyebrow. "Someone's feisty today." Scott shrugged and dumped the egg and sausage blend into a serving bowl. "Guess that wildly loud sex was good for something."

"Kali..." Deucalion rubbed the bridge of his nose as he stirred his tea. Scott sat next to him and placed the bowl down, serving himself first since he knew his pack wouldn't touch the food until he had. As soon as he finished, the rest of the group served themselves, Aiden and Ethan going last and arguing over portion sizes. Scott cast a careful eye over Derek, but the older boy wouldn't meet his eyes, instead continuing to glower at Deucalion, who steadily met him. Something had to give soon.

"You know what? I've changed my mind," Scott stated matter-of-factly as his two betas glared daggers at each other. "You two _can_ fight."

" _What?_ "

"Excuse me?"

Both men jerked and stared at the young alpha. Kali, Aiden, and Ethan's heads all snapped up and they suddenly looked incredibly interested in the conversation.

"Yeah, go at it." Scott waved a hand and speared the food on his plate with a fork. "But for entertainment value, can you both be naked while doing so?" Aiden rolled his eyes and went back to breakfast with a mutter. Ethan and Kali continued avidly staring. Scott had the satisfaction of seeing both men turn a bright red and mumble apologies before busying themselves with food. The young alpha gave a large smile. "Thought so."

It was later in the day that Scott found himself alone in the house. The twins having gone to their day job, this time at a boating company, while Kali was out doing whatever she normally did during the days. Derek had taken up volunteering at a local animal shelter, which Scott found kind of adorable, and Deucalion had left on a rare errand run. They were almost completely out of food and shopping could not be put off any longer. Though the older wolf was loath to leave Scott, he had assured his beta he could survive an hour without him.

Scott set his book down, taking a deep breath of morning air. He had taken to reading up on the roof and although Michigan had bitterly cold mornings, the young wolf found he didn't mind the chill. He was feeling better today, awake and refreshed. For the first time in over a month Scott found himself wanting to explore the city. As long as he made it quick, Deucalion wouldn't worry, didn't have to know. Scott threw on a jacket as he made his way out the door, scenting the air for his pack and finding no one close by. He picked a random direction and started walking.

Besides the cold it was a nice morning; slightly overcast with patches of shade and sun dancing across the ground. The pack lived in a residential area away from the main city so most of the people Scott saw were either young mothers with toddlers or older folk walking their dogs. One elderly lady's German Shepard perked up when Scott walked by and pulled on his owner's leash, struggling to get closer.

"Oh, I'm so sorry!" the lady exclaimed, struggling with the leash. "He's never like this." Scott blinked, surprised. It had been years since animals had acted favorably to him. Since the darkness had taken over all animals had shied away, frightened of him. The young man bent down and held out his hand. The dog eagerly came up and started licking it.

"It's fine," Scott told the lady. "I like dogs." He shifted his hand and patted the hound's head.

"That's good," the lady said then sighed. "He generally doesn't like new people, but he seems to be taken with you." Scott gave a small smile and noticed gray fur around the muzzle.

"Is he old?"

"Oh very old," the lady confirmed, "I got him two years ago as a rescue. They think he's a little over twelve, not much time left, but I couldn't leave him at the pound. The older ones never get taken."

"You're a good person," Scott said and locked eyes with the dog, red slowly bleeding into his. The Shepard whined and wagged his tail, licking at Scott's chin. "Most people would have kept walking." He stood up and brushed off his jeans. "Back you go." He pointed to the older lady and the dog retreated back to his master. Scott waved them both goodbye and felt something twist in his chest. Animals liked him again. Maybe he wasn't as broken as he thought, maybe Deucalion was right.

Scott lost himself in thought and kept walking, eventually losing track of time as well. His feet continued moving forward and his mind kept turning, hand going into his pocket where he kept that wolfsbane bullet from so long ago. He played out the past four years in his mind over and over again, all the events leading up to this moment, to who he was now. He clenched his hand around the bullet as guilt crashed upon him again, images of Deucalion hurt and bleeding. The amount of pain he had caused was staggering.

Scott found himself in a forest when he looked back up, at his feet a large gnarled tree trunk. A flash of the Nemeton came to his mind, ice water rushing over his skin and inky blackness seeping into his vision. The moment passed and in its place Scott felt warm, hot even. His stomach fluttered and the young man wrapped his arms around himself and crouched down, curled in on himself. Just when he'd thought he'd grown comfortable with himself, apparently his body was still confused. One step forward two steps—

A howl cut off his train of thought and Scott straightened, looking at the sky. The sun would be setting soon. When had so much time passed? Another howl sounded and Scott heard the clear notes of panic in Deucalion's voice. The rest of the pack immediately responded and Scott's chest twinged at their distress. He let out his own call, keeping his tone calm and apologetic. A few moments passed and he knew it would be best to wait for one of his pack to find him.

Scott sat heavily on the tree stump, waiting. The day had started off well enough, perhaps too much time to think was still a bad thing. Scott's eyes stung as he stared into the trees. He shouldn't have left the house. Just because he felt better for an instant didn't mean he was fine. He still had a long way to go before his mentality stabilized, but for a moment, all Scott had wanted was to be normal again. And he had felt it too, this morning with his pack.

He needed more time, but he had to rush. Weakness like this wouldn't be ignored much longer.

"There you are." A cold sweat broke over Scott as Kali walked up behind him. The thought hadn't occurred to him that she could catch him alone like this, he'd just assumed Deucalion would find him first. Scott fought for control over his heartbeat, trying to let nothing show. Kali let out a howl, altering the pack that she had found him. The younger alpha huddled closer in on himself, alert and tense. If it came down to it he would defend himself...except, maybe he deserved—

"That old wolf's right, you think too much." Kali slid down and joined Scott, looking entirely too unconcerned.

"It's my job to think." Scott's hands clenched at his side.

"For the pack, in times of danger and to plan attacks. Not self-deprecating thoughts leading to indecision and weakness." Kali danced around her words, voice playful. Scott wasn't fooled for a second.

"Guess I've had a lot on my mind," he sighed. Deucalion wouldn't make it in time, none of the pack would. It would still be best to fight, even if he did deserve this. "Speaking of weakness—"

"Did I ever tell you about my brother?" Kali interrupted, looking over her nails and completely indifferent to Scott's inner turmoil.

The younger alpha held back another sigh. "Of course not, you never talk about yourself. _Ever_."

"Right." Kali nodded. "Any way, you look a bit like him—of course his hair was much shaggier, you've got this clean cut thing going on that's nice, but he was a stupid kid so it's to be expected—and he followed me around all the time when we were younger. Thinking back, it was really ridiculous how he looked up to me." She tucked some of her hair behind an ear.

Scott stayed absolutely still, puzzled by the turn of events but not wanting to set her off either. Kali's eyes took an odd quality as she looked up to the darkening sky. "When I turned, it was of my choice. The darkness and brutality of my pack called to me and I embraced it, I found power within it. I left my old life and never looked back...never said goodbye. It was a clean cut I made."

Somehow, none of this surprised Scott. "Why are you telling me this?" he asked, picking his words with care.

"You're the only alpha I've ever had that I liked." Kali frowned, like it was a disturbing thought. "By that I mean, the only alpha I've never wanted to kill when they showed weakness. I'm not sure, but five years ago you'd have already been dead for becoming this weak and soft, because that was the type of person I had turned into. It's how I took down my first alpha and I was just waiting for Deucalion to be injured in a fight so I could rip his throat out and take over the alpha pack."

"What alpha pack?" Scott couldn't help but laugh bitterly. "If you had done that Aiden and Ethan would have attacked you and with them dead, it would have just been you and Ennis. Not much of an alpha pack."

"Well, yes. I see that now." Kali rolled her eyes. "That was just always my frame of mind. Look for weakness, take down the leader."

"And now?" Scott looked over to her and finally placed the emotion in the she-alpha's eyes. Confusion.

"I think...I've gotten tired of killing," she confessed and shrugged. "This whole time you've been down and out I haven't felt restless. Don't need to hunt to feel satisfied. When I think back to all of the blood I've shed, all the lives I've taken, I don't feel regret, but I do feel—"

"—drained?" Scott sighed and felt the woman shift next to him. "When we were hunting the white wolf, even before the darkness left me, I had started to feel exhausted of my current lifestyle."

"Like I said: big intellectual thinker." It was meant to be harsh, but Kali's own voice softened the words. "Always two steps ahead of the rest of the pack. You really are like that old wolf." She paused for a moment, trying to gather her thoughts. "I-I don't know what I want anymore." And Scott could tell how much this troubled her, the fact that Kali was sitting down and talking about her life to someone being the biggest indicator.

"I know what that's like," he said softly.

"It's fucking frustrating is what it is," Kali snapped and sounded much like her old self, Scott found himself grinning. A thought came to him.

"Why don't you go back and try to find your family? That brother of yours?"

" _Right_." Her voice turned sour and Kali's eyes narrowed. She ran a hand through her hair and bit her lip. "Look, I don't want pity but, my brother was the one bright spot in my life. Our father? He was a brute. Beat us daily for the smallest mistakes, weakness wasn't tolerated. I've heard some horror stories in my time and I guess I was lucky. He slapped me around but he never _touched_ me. You want real horror stories ask Deucalion about his first alpha.

Anyways, I was strong. I knew how to curl and deflect the worst of my father's rage. My brother was—well, fragile. I told you he followed me around all the damn time, I was his pillar and I up and left one day. Left him to that life, never said goodbye, never thought to take him with me." She sighed and glared at Scott. "And I didn't regret it until I met you. Until I woke up in an urgent care center and you were on the floor, pale and bleeding and dead-looking and it was so stupid, but the only thing I could think about was if my brother died looking like that."

"Oh." Scott needed to get better at using his words. He fidgeted with his sweater sleeves and tried to absorb all the information that had just been dumped on him. It explained a lot, though. "Guess that's why you don't like being touched," he observed.

"And why I don't like intimacy and need to be in control, _yes_. I don't need to be psychoanalyzed, kid. I know my faults." Kali's sarcasm bit at him. "Listen, I know my brother is either dead, fucked up beyond repair, or somehow also managed to drag himself away from that life. I don't belong in _any_ of those scenarios."

"Where do you belong?" Scott asked and Kali slapped him on the back of the head, surprising the young alpha and making him yelp.

"Here, obviously. Making sure my exceedingly young leader doesn't drown himself in emotion and self-doubt like a teenager who thinks life is far more dramatic than it actually is. The whole point of this," she gestured between them, "is that I don't plan to make the same mistake twice. I may not know what I want from life anymore, but I still know my place. It's just that simple."

"I—I." Scott was at a loss. His brain froze, unsure of what to do. "That simple?" He finally latched on to a word.

"That simple," she confirmed and gave a pointed look to Scott, who took a second to realize that whole first part of the speech had been for him.

"I'm...I'm acting like a regular teenager?" Somewhere hope flared in his chest.

"Uh, _yeah_ ," Kali exaggerated. "It's a pretty good act, too. Everyone else seems to be caught up in it and is freaking out over you. People have to fight and overcome darkness within themselves all the time, it's generally not as literal as what you had to do, but still. People change everyday and it's not the end of the world."

Put like that, maybe Scott was overreacting. Just a little.

"You really don't want to attack me?" he asked, just to make sure because this was still a lot to take in.

"You'd be dead already if I did," Kali deadpanned and Scott figured she was right. He scratched the back of his head and grinned weakly.

"Sorry, it's just, you've _seemed_ restless to me the past several weeks. I had all but planned on you to attack."

"Ah," the she-alpha tapped her cheek. "Yeah, guess it might look like that. It was frustration, not restlessness. I hate not knowing what I want, or what to do."

"I can see that now." A fear eased in Scott's chest and he could finally breathe, his mind settled and a calm fell over him. Both alphas shared a companionable silence. Which was ruined as Deucalion burst upon the scene, startling Scott badly. "Wh-what—"

The older wolf snarled at Kali, who raised an eyebrow, and coiled his body to attack, only to stumble to a halt as he completely took in everything. Scott noticed Deucalion panting hard, sweat covering his body and his eyes were wild.

"Are you okay?" Scott leaped forward, worried.

The older man flinched at the question, falling to a knee in exhaustion. "Am I?" His voice cracked.

"Ha! Looks like you weren't the only one who thought I'd attack." Kali chuckled and Scott's brain finally caught up. He bit his lip as he realized that when Kali had announced to the pack her discovery of Scott, Deucalion had feared the worst. That his promise to protect Scott was undone.

"Hey, I'm fine," he reassured and crouched next to the other. Deucalion immediately pulled him in and pressed their foreheads together.

"I thought—"

"Sorry, sorry." Scott kept apologizing. "I just wanted to go out for a walk, didn't think I'd be gone that long. Just...kinda lost track of time. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to worry you."

"It's his right." Kali sighed as she stood up and looked down at Deucalion. "He's the alpha. He can do what he wants."

"Kali, _don't_ ," Scott warned as he saw a vein pulse dangerously on Deucalion's neck and a growl start deep in his chest. He leaned in further and ran and hand through the other's hair. " _Calm down_." And he made it an order, pleased to feel the older wolf start to relax and sag against Scott.

"I can see where you get your dramatic streak," Kali commented and Scott sent her a heated glare.

Later that night, after they finally returned home and Scott had apologized to Derek and the twins for worrying them, Deucalion crawled into bed without asking for permission and wrapped himself tightly around the younger alpha. Scott squirmed slightly, trying to get comfortable.

"Hey, ease up. I'm not going anywhere," he said, but Deucalion didn't respond. Scott twisted and tried to turn to face the older wolf, giving a huff in annoyance when Deucalion's grip made that impossible. "Seriously?" he asked.

"Don't do that again," the man muttered into Scott's back and the guilt crashed into the younger wolf.

"I really am sorry," he repeated and gave up trying to turn around, settling for stroking the older wolf's arm. "I dunno, but I felt pretty good this afternoon. I finally wanted to go outside. I just thought it'd be a quick walk."

"What happened?"

"Nothing." Scott shrugged. "Well, I-I got sucked into my own thoughts again. Started worrying about stuff. It was probably best Kali found me, gave us a chance to talk."

"And if she had decided to attack?"

"I would have fought," the young man maintained. He didn't add that it would have been futile. "Anyways, she didn't. And she says she won't, I believe her."

"I do _not_."

"Deucalion, if she'd really wanted to kill me I wouldn't be here right now. You know that." He grimaced as the man tightened his grip around him. Deucalion stayed silent and Scott knew he was still processing. "I remind her of her younger brother," he disclosed quietly. "I don't know what type of life you came from before turning, but mine's always connected me to my humanity at least in some way. Maybe it does the same for her?" The other alpha gave a long sigh and finally relaxed against Scott.

"I still don't trust her." But he nuzzled at the back of Scott's neck, licking gently, and the young man knew he had let it go for now.

"Well, you're my beta," Scott responded and he turned to face Deucalion. "It's your job to look out for me."

" _Of course_."

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Deucalion really is a good beta for Scott, honestly even in the series he only ever listens to Scott. Anyways, let me know what you guys thought! Comments and kudos are always appreciated.


	3. Chapter 3

* * *

Two months later Scott woke in a cold sweat from a nightmare; a horrible thought came to him about something important he had left unfinished.

"Morning," he greeted at breakfast and sat next to the twins, startling them both.

"Did we do something wrong?" Aidan asked quickly. Although Scott had finally begun to get a grip on his sanity, finding his center as an alpha again, the twins still shied away around him. Both had taken a submissive posture in their seats.

"What? No, of course not," Scott assured them, rolling his eyes. "I've come to a conclusion to an issue that needs to be resolved."

"Sure sounds like they did something wrong," Kali interjected slyly from across the table, before drinking from her coffee. Scott could practically feel as both twins broke out into a sweat and he glared at the she-alpha. Deucalion watched carefully next to her, face closed, but heartbeat steadied out as it did when he was uneasy. And everybody wondered how Scott got his dramatic streak, his entire pack was overly dramatic!

"For the love of God, no one did anything wrong," he huffed and turned back to his omegas. "I think we should finish high school."

"Um..." Whatever the twins had been expecting him to say, clearly it wasn't that.

"Where did this come from?" Derek asked from the end of the table, his usual scowl in place.

"I don't know." Scott shrugged. "It's just something I realized I regretted: never graduating or anything. It used to be really important to me."

"Okay, but what do _we_ have to do with this?" Ethan asked.

"Well, you two didn't graduate either."

"So?" Aidan grunted.

Scott gritted his teeth and took a moment to compose himself. "Don't you two want to better yourselves?"

"Sure, but not through study." Aidan shrugged. "And _not_ through math."

"He's being a little bitch, ignore him Alpha." Ethan sighed. "He hates math."

"There is literally _no_ point for me to study it!"

"Having a GED opens the door for more jobs," Scott pointed out. "Plus from what I recall, it's not that hard of a test. It shouldn't take too much studying to get you two caught up."

"Why would they need more job options?" Kali rolled her eyes. "They seem quite happy with manual labor and taking off their shirts."

"Ha! I knew you were watching," Aiden accused. Scott repressed another sigh and waited for his pack to calm down. Which, after Deucalion sent a warning growl across the table to the twins, ended up not being that long.

"You should want to have as many options as possible," he started again. "When we settle there might not be a manual labor option or you may want to try something new."

"Settle?" Both twins grew serious and gave Scott their full attention. In fact, the entire pack had gone quiet.

"You want to settle?" Deucalion asked carefully, voice and heartbeat still neutral.

"Not here." Scott shrugged. "But yeah, I'd like to find a place to settle and create a more permanent den." He knew this was important to the twins, something they had always wanted. A home.

"Oh." That was about the most either of them could do.

"If you start talking about pups and mating then I'm fucking out of here," Kali snorted and it broke some of the tension. Scott could feel the undercurrent of emotions swirling within his pack at his words and worked hard to maintain his casual presence. Derek leaned closer to him.

"You know that's a big step for a pack: finding a place to settle. Certain instincts will kick in once you pick a place."

"I figured." Scott nodded. He had to stop himself from asking how Derek felt about the decision. He was the alpha, the others would let him know in private if they had issues, but in front of the group his word was law. It had been taking some practice with Deucalion and Kali, but Scott was getting better at honing his instincts without being cruel or uncompromising.

"It would be nice to have a home again," Derek finally agreed and sat back in his seat.

"Hence the GED exam." Scott pulled them back to his original topic. "It's just something that might make settled life a bit easier." In this instance Scott wanted to give his omegas a choice, and to be honest he wanted studying mates, too.

"Yeah, okay." Ethan replied immediately and Aidan sighed loudly, but nodded when Scott sent him a questioning look.

"Good," Scott brightened considerably, "let's get started."

Lessons began the next day and Scott turned his passion for research into study topics for the GED. Teaching the twins everything he could get his hands on. He bought a preparation booklet and had all three of them take the practice test to see what areas they needed to focus on (which ended up being every subject for both twins).

It felt wonderful to pour over the familiar information: writing, mathematics, social studies, history, science, and reading. As soon as he'd started rereading the curriculum it felt like seeing an old friend again, memories of school rushing into his mind. Scott made sure to try and add in as much werewolf lore within the studies as he could find, partly for himself and partly to keep Aidan interested as the twin struggled the most out of the three with learning.

Deucalion went through all the lycanthropy history with them, telling stories and the origins of their mythology. Scott found it endlessly fascinating, often staying longer than the twins to listen to more stories and go into greater depth about a subject.

His interest only seemed to excite Deucalion and further spur his academic enthusiasm and they would both talk long into the nights. Scott's dreams were filled with ancient knowledge and tales of wolves dancing in the light.

It took four months of constant study for the twins to be at a satisfactory level for Scott to sign them up for testing. At that point both Derek and Kali were pent up with restless energy as most of the pack had been cooped up and normal activities, such as patrols and sparing, had been put aside.

As for the twins, Scott had never been more proud. Aidan especially had ended up flourishing (although not in math) when Scott had decided to add an extra curricular subject to relieve some of the intense pressure and picked art.

They had each chosen a different medium, with Aidan picking carpentry and excelling at it far past anyone's expectations. Ethan had tried metal sculpture but had ended up focusing on welding more than actual art and Scott had taken up photography.

He'd never had a flare for creativity and perhaps it reminded him of Allison; however, like her, he wasn't very good at it. Although Deucalion poured over his pictures with an fixation that confused Scott, wondering if it had something to do with his past blindness.

The past three months of studying together had led the three young men to form a habit of gathering at the coffee table in the living room, sitting on the floor and going over their respective studies. Scott encouraged them along the way, finally starting to bond with the twins and forming a connection they'd previously never shared. The more time he spent with them, chatting and sometimes just quietly hanging out, the calmer the two seemed to become. They actively began to seek him out to talk and shied around him less and less until one night, a week before they tested and Scott had them cramming, the two fell asleep pressed up tight against either side of him, showing an unguarded sense of trust they generally only had for Deucalion.

"Something wrong?" Scott asked later that night after he had staggered into his room and collapsed on the bed. Deucalion was still up, sitting on the bed and regarding Scott with a muted look.

"It's nothing." He reached out and brushed a hand through Scott's hair, eyes softening. The young man leaned into the touch and let exhaustion wash over him and drifted off.

* * *

"Ready?" Scott asked a week later, Aidan and Ethan standing on either side of him in front of the testing center. The sky was clear, sun high in the sky as a brisk breeze ruffled their clothes. The air around them was quiet for a moment as both twins took a deep breath.

"No." Aidan replied suddenly and looked pale.

Ethan shrugged.

"Remember, it's an almost eight hour test," Scott went over again, paternal instincts kicking in. "Use your time wisely, we've gone over tons of strategies. You just need to score 410 on each subject to pass so if you don't know the answer just move on to the next problem." Both twins sighed and Scott had to remind himself to back off. "Calculators?" he asked before he could help it.

"Yes, _dad_ ," Ethan finally huffed and they both held one up. "God, you're worse than Deucalion." The older wolf in question had been in an extreme state of calm the entire morning, which Scott took to be his version of panic, as his heartbeat had been steadier than a metronome and that had to take an insane amount of control to do for that long.

"You'll do fine," Scott said after another minute. He opened the door and started to walk in. "I trust you." It was quiet and he didn't turn around to see their faces.

Eight hours later in the park they had promised to meet, Scott was barreled over by his omegas in their excitement as they showed him their passing scores. An incredible feeling welled up in his chest then, only for him to realize it was pure elation; happiness like Scott hadn't felt in years. He pulled both twins in for a hug and howled up into the sky before he could contain it. Aiden and Ethan joined in and for once, Scott felt completely at peace with himself. Whole, as if his scars both mental and physical had been washed away. Over something so simple, but important too.

Their boundless excitement and energy swept through the rest of the pack when they returned home, amplified by the restlessness everyone had been feeling and the next clear memory Scott had was of running through a forest, full moon shimmering above and the scent of his entire pack around him. He laughed, wild and recklessly, dancing with the trees and wind.

Scott felt through the shifting of scents and the slide of skin, a firm body press up against him. Through the wind and the music of everyone's heartbeats Deucalion moved in sync with Scott, their bodies twisting and twirling together. Dancing in the darkness and moonlight Scott felt his stomach clench with want. He blinked, and was suddenly swept up into a fervent kiss, Deucalion's hands cupping Scott's face.

Everyone howled around them and he could feel the power of the moon calling and swirling within. Scott pulled away, took a deep breath and kissed back, channeling everything he felt in that moment through it. The world spun and for one golden moment, nothing in the world could bring down Scott McCall.

Of course morning came eventually, as did reality.

"Wh-what?" Scott almost rolled out of bed, senses not all kicking in at the same time. He blinked at the sunlight glittering behind the curtains and didn't remember coming back home or falling asleep. Odd.

That was when the scent hit him.

"Oh _god_." Like a sucker punch to the gut, Scott rolled up into a ball and tried to calm his instincts. Their heat had come early.

"Deucalion?" He twisted around and found the older man turned away, body twitching and arousal radiating off him. Scott sat up and had to shake his head, dizziness overcoming him. Something was different, his pack's scent was off. Why had the heat come so early? It had barely been nine months. " _Deucalion_." He tried again and reached out for his bedmate, but as soon as his skin made contact Scott found himself engulfed by the other wolf, Deucalion's lips burning on his as hands pulled Scott flush against him.

His scent was potent enough to make Scott lightheaded and he felt his vision flicker, adding to his alarm. His pack's desire was always compelling during a heat, clamoring at his senses and demanding fulfillment, but never to the point of overpowering him physically. This time it felt draining just to be around the other alpha. Scott felt himself go limp and fall back, hitting the mattress with a thump.

At his lack of response Deucalion finally pulled away, although he kept his head buried against the younger man's neck. " _Scott?_ " Voice harsh and wrecked, a tongue swiped out to lick across Scott's skin.

He didn't answer back, heartbeat becoming irregular as he gasped for breath as whatever Scott was feeling intensified. A weight lifted and suddenly Deucalion's face was before his, pupils blown out and irises an intense red, but his face alarmed.

The sounds of the rest of the pack filtered into Scott's senses and impulse took over. He pushed Deucalion away. "Need to check on the others." He managed and stumbled out of bed.

"You're pale—" Deucalion was clearly wrestling with his own instincts, his naked body covered in a sheen of sweat; Scott could practically feel the pulse of his blood, a thick vein in his neck calling to him. He turned and made for the door.

"I'll be back, don't worry." Outside the room the scent was weaker and Scott took a moment to collect himself. It was ruined as Kali came out and Scott flinched back, able to smell the wetness between her legs.

"Alpha?" She rushed up to him as Scott slid down the wall to sit on the floor, the world floating as vertigo seemed to overtake him.

"Something's wrong, Kali." He mumbled and pushed his hands against his temples. "Heat's early. Your scents are off. I feel weird." She was careful and didn't touch him, but Scott could smell the sheer want on her, could see the swell of her breasts underneath her overcoat.

"What..." Kali paused from whatever she had been about to say and studied Scott, eyes sharp even when clouded with lust.

"What's wrong with me?" Scott asked and didn't like how helpless he sounded. Through the walls to his room he thought he heard Deucalion make a pained noise. A hand finally touched his shoulder and he watched as Kali took a shuddering breath.

"I need you to trust me, Alpha." She spoke slowly. "Nothing's wrong, but I don't have the willpower to sit here and explain it unless you want to fuck me senseless against the wall so I can calm down."

"Please _no_ ," Scott muttered and they both gave small smiles.

"So believe me that you're fine and what's happening can be explained. What you're experiencing? It may seem hard but give into it, you'll feel better." She shook and her scent was almost nauseating, but a primal part of him growled and his she-alpha trembled on her knees. "I really need to go, I almost—"

"Go." Scott ordered and she took off. He heaved himself up, hands scrabbling at the wall to steady himself. He had to accept that Kali knew what she was talking about. A sharp bark was issued and only Derek responded, meaning the twins had already left.

"Are you alright?" Scott asked as he leaned heavily against Derek's door.

"Fine." His pack mate responded instantly, voice rough but gentle. He didn't open the door and Scott was glad for it, unsure if he could handle Derek's scent as well. "Are you? I heard Kali."

"Is she right?" If anyone would know about werewolves, it'd be Derek.

"I think I know what she's getting at." The other responded. "I have to leave too, but just remember that a pack responds to their alpha. You've changed and from your perspective, so has our heats."

"My perspective..." Scott trailed off, contemplating. It was cut off as he heard another pained noise from Deucalion and he ran back over to his door. "Told you I'd be—what are you doing?!" He meant to yell but it came out as a frantic whisper. Deucalion was kneeling on their bed, claws sunken deep into his leg with blood trickling down.

"Scott, you look faint." He groaned and Scott noticed his scent had weakened. He was trying to force the heat out of his body.

"No, don't do that. I'm fine." Of course Scott had to put his hands on his knees to steady himself as the world spun. He focused on Kali's words; to give into the feeling. Of what? Passing out on the floor?

He opened his eyes and looked over Deucalion, pain and anxiety mixed in his scent now, blood still pounding through his body and erection straining between his legs. His neck called out to Scott again and the young man concentrated on that. " _Stop hurting yourself_." He commanded and let his eyes shift and teeth come out. It was the first time he had ordered Deucalion during a heat.

Deucalion's nails slid back into his hand and Scott could hear his breathing hitch at his alpha's display of power. Scott drew more energy from that and stalked forward, the scent of lust returning tenfold and he threw himself on the older man, clamping his teeth around Deucalion's neck. He groaned, hands seizing Scott's back, human nails scraping down soft skin and the younger man arched, moaning through his bite. Deucalion thrashed at the vibrations it caused, hips thrusting up against Scott.

"There we go." Scott breathed, releasing his grip. He smiled as Deucalion grabbed his shoulders and pulled him down for another bruising kiss, teeth flashing and moans tumbling from his lips.

"Y-you're sure—?" Deucalion always tried so hard for him, it was humbling. Scott growled and snaked a hand down to grip Deucalion's cock, wrenching a broken groan from the man. He pumped roughly, running a finger along the slit and moving his mouth to trail along the solid chest beneath him. Scott felt as Deucalion's claws snapped out and sunk into his back, but he shrugged off the pain, falling further into the heat.

"Tell me what you want." Scott mumbled into heated skin, drawing a nipple between his teeth before sucking hard. His hand moved lower so he could massage the older man's scrotum, rolling the trembling flesh with sure fingers. Deucalion bucked into his hand, gasping and Scott felt the scrape of fangs against his shoulder. "You wanna bite me? That what you wanna do?" He teased, removing his hand before shoving his knee between Deucalion's legs so the man could grind against it. Scott reached behind to the fingers buried in his back and pried them away, pinning Deucalion's wrists against the bed and leaning over the other with only his knee to tortuously satisfy the older man. Deucalion's teeth were fully extended and Scott knew from experience they ached to bite. He bent down closer. "Do you wish it had been _you_ that had bitten me? To make me a werewolf, to sink into my neck and taste my blood?"

Scott nearly slipped and fell as Deucalion jerked violently against his knee, incoherent sounds pouring from his lips as his teeth snapped at the neck in front of him. He had lost all control and a part of Scott reveled in it.

"Tell me what you want." He repeated, egged on. " _Please_ tell me. I'm yours right now." Deucalion surged up, crushing his lips against Scott's again and forcing his way into the younger man's mouth.

"You. Need _you_ —all of you." Scott was amazed he managed to put that many words together and decided to try and help.

"Want me to fuck you so hard you'll feel it for days?" He purred, licking gently at Deucalion's neck.

" _Please_." Deucalion panted, struggling against Scott's hold, arching to try and get closer. His eyes were a brilliant red that glowed, tears threatening to fall in his desperation. Scott groaned loudly at the words, primal instincts taking over and an idea blossoming within his mind.

"I know what you need." He released his bedmate's hands and fumbled for the nightstand. Deucalion immediately attacked his chest once free, tongue and teeth scraping at his skin with hands returning to his back. Scott gave a strangled laugh as Deucalion grabbed his ass and pushed their hips together, painfully reminding him of his own needs.

He finally wrenched open the drawer and pulled out some lube, sitting back up and pushing Deucalion down. The older wolf whined but stayed still, eyeing the bottle with desire.

Scott turned the other man on his side before lifting his closest leg and hooking it over his shoulder, running a finger along Deucalion's skin and noting the rougher hair on his calf becoming finer and softer as he trailed down closer to his thigh before reaching the smooth muscled skin of his ass and pressing against his entrance. Deucalion buried his face in the sheets to cover his loud moan, cock dripping with anticipation.

Scott squirted a generous amount of the clear lubricant onto his hand before pressing a single finger into the wolf below him, grinning as Deucalion cried out in frustration, hips pushing back and demanding more.

"I heard what you said." Scott assured and sunk another two fingers into him, twisting them around before brushing against Deucalion's prostate. The man's leg around him tightened as he flailed against Scott, screaming into the mattress, claws ripping at the bedding. The young man was forced to grab the leg on his shoulder to steady himself.

" _More_." Deucalion begged as Scott slowly thrust in and out of him.

"Like this?" He pushed a fourth finger in, feeling the tight ring of muscle clamp down at the intrusion. Deucalion, for his part, seemed to finally realize what Scott had planned and gave a long muffled whine, tears finally breaking as he pleaded to Scott breathlessly.

"You said to fill you." Scott expanded, sliding his thumb in as well. "What you need is a good hard knot inside, pressing so tight against your walls that it feels like you're gonna burst." It was tricky, trying to push his knuckles past the sphincter as Scott didn't want to hurt Deucalion, but was encouraged by the noises the man made at both his actions and words. The further he sunk in, the more the man's cock leaked, dark red in his excitement. "I'm not a wolf right now, but that doesn't mean I can't give you what you want."

The sight in front of Scott was intoxicating as his entire fist finally pushed into Deucalion. The man lay sprawled on the bed, twisted to the side and legs trembling, curled around Scott with clawed fingers white and clenched into the sheets; sweat coating his body as he panted, trying to adjust.

" _Mine_." Scott whispered and closed his fist, making a knot within the other. He knew when it pressed against Deucalion's prostate because the man's entire body writhed and his back sharply arched as he convulsed in pleasure. Scott removed his free hand from Deucalion's leg to stroke the other's neglected cock, using quick and precise movements as the older wolf squirmed on his fist, bucking against him before hitting his climax.

" _SCOTT!_ " Deucalion screamed, fangs showing as he transformed fully. Scott squeezed his fist to prolong the feeling as come spurt from Deucalion with such force that it splattered all across the bed and onto his face. Scott's mind left him for a moment, rushing forward to lick greedily at it before plunging his fangs into the outstretched neck, spiraling Deucalion further down another wave of pleasure. He continued milking him, wrenching another orgasm from Deucalion before carefully withdrawing his hand and falling back onto the bed, exhausted.

Scott listened to Deucalion breathing with anxiety in his stomach, making sure there were no sounds of pain. It was an unusual heat, so Scott wasn't sure how long this might need to continue.

"You alright?" he finally wheezed out, too weary to try and sit up as whatever power he had been drawing from the heat, left him. The only answer he received was a low sated groan from Deucalion. "Good." Scott sighed, feeling sweat trickle down his forehead. In a few minutes he would attempt to move again, until then—

His breath choked off as Deucalion brushed a hand over his body, heaving himself over to grab Scott's legs and drag the young man closer, yanking off his briefs and licking roughly at his flagging erection. Scott moaned, part in pleasure, but mainly in fatigue. Deucalion drew him in completely and sucked with a raw hunger, hollowing out his cheeks to enclose Scott in a tight wet heat. It sent electricity down his spine, but did nothing to drive back the tiredness.

"Hey, give me a small break." He pushed at the overeager alpha, but was ignored. Deucalion made a desperate noise as his arms ran up Scott's side and twined around him. " _Deucalion_." At his command the older wolf pulled back with a whine. Part of Scott mourned the loss of those talented lips.

"Please," Deucalion begged, kissing at the young wolf's sensitive hips, "just want to worship your body...you've done so much—" Scott knew he was still out of it, words a jumbled mess. "Just want to love you..."

"Um," Scott coughed nervously. He finally managed to sit up and draw the other closer, nuzzling at Deucalion's neck and licking at his bite mark, slightly embarrassed at the probably unintended declaration. He decided to ignore it. "I know you don't like to leave things unfinished, I'm just too tired to go another round right now." He explained gently. "Give me a few minutes."

"Your scent's already changing." Deucalion pointed out, eyes still a burning red. He growled at Scott's ministrations.

"Yeah," Scott looked down and saw his excitement decreasing again, "don't know what's wrong with me."

"Nothing. Nothing's wrong." Deucalion mouthed at Scott's ear, nipping at the ear and sending a tiny jolt through him. "Let me help you."

"I want to be able to give you the attention you deserve." Scott argued. Deucalion made a distressed sound in the back of his throat and pressed against Scott until the young man was lying back on the bed.

"No, _my_ turn." His eyes sharpened for just a moment, showing Scott he knew what he was saying. "Let me pleasure you... _please_." Trust. He was asking for Scott's trust.

"Ok."

It was shaky, but Scott meant what he said, fingers trembling as he clutched the sheets underneath him. In a flash Deucalion was back lavishing his cock, tongue everywhere, humming around Scott to make the young man shiver. A small part of him felt guilt, that Deucalion was being so gentle with him when Scott hadn't the first time he'd pinned the older wolf underneath him.

"Stop thinking." Deucalion pulled back just enough to mutter, nipping at Scott's thigh and the younger wolf jerked. He watched as Deucalion trailed kisses up along his chest, hands constantly moving and caressing, almost massaging and Scott tried to relax into it. His breath stuttered as Deucalion reached his neck and started sucking lightly on his pulse, causing lightning shoot down his nerves and Scott fought against the urge to tilt his neck. Deucalion chuckled at this and the vibrations made Scott jolt, hands coming up to rest on the other's hips.

"Wh-what are you doing?" He tried not to sound scared. Deucalion scraped his teeth over Scott's neck as he switched to the other side. The younger man buckled as his neck was lavished, sensations flooding his system and he tried to keep breathing through it. Deucalion freed a hand and grasped Scott's erection, pulling a gasp from him. Skillful fingers ran up and down its length as Deucalion pressed his tongue flat against Scott's neck, along a jugular and something about the motion twisted at Scott's chest.

"Deucalion—" Deucalion finally retreated, Scott's hand coming to his neck to feel the healing bruises. He took a deep breath, calming his heart as he prepared himself. At least his cock seemed to be enjoying the attention.

"Did..." Deucalion looked unsure of himself for a moment. "Did that feel good?"

Scott blinked. "It felt—different."

He pulled the older man down on him, pleasantly surprised when Deucalion went straight for his mouth, kissing frantically. They broke after a moment and he moved to Scott's chest, passing his neck and the younger man sighed in relief. It choked out as Deucalion nipped at his flesh, but before he could process much else the man sat up, face tense. Scott frowned, worried, and he open his mouth to speak, but was cut off as the older wolf climbed on top of his sprawled body, aligning himself and sinking down onto Scott's erection.

"Oh." His mind fizzled out as he dug his feet into the mattress to push himself more into the other. Deucalion shuddered as he was filled and finally seemed comfortable, relaxing. Scott's hands found their way to his hips, mind dizzy with desire as he watched Deucalion straddle him, shifting and sending warm shocks through him.

"G-gonna move?" he managed to ask. Deucalion watched him carefully, eyes sharper and not clouded like Scott wanted. At the his words the man finally stirred, hips bucking against Scott's and they both moaned. Deucalion rode him, body working hard as he set an intense pace, sweat rolling off his body and muscles tight as he gripped the headboard for leverage and to change his angle. Scott's back had arched off the bed as he gritted his teeth, eyes closed, the pleasure nearly overwhelming him but he hung on, panting as the sight above him was worth it.

" _Scott_..." Deucalion whimpered and the young wolf realized he was getting close, erection quivering again as he neared his peak, but holding himself back. He wanted Scott to come first.

"It's cool, you can—" His voice cut off as Deucalion slammed himself down on Scott, walls tightening around his cock and making the younger man see stars. His claws slid out and buried themselves into Deucalion's hips, the sensation pushing the man closer to the edge, whining as he clearly held himself back from release. A part of Scott enjoyed seeing him struggle so much, exhausted but with ecstasy running rampant through his system, trying to fight against the pleasure he was obviously feeling.

Scott shoved past his own fatigue and wrapped a hand around the other wolf's member. Deucalion jumped at the motion, causing them both to cry out, and swore as his entire body trembled. His arms collapsed and he fell on top of Scott, head buried in the crook of his neck as he shuddered violently, Scott's hand playing roughly with him.

"I—" Whatever Deucalion had been about to say was lost as Scott bit his neck, tongue running along the flesh in his mouth and the older man broke, breathless, come coating Scott's hand and their chests. His entire body clamped around the younger wolf and it surprised Scott so much that his own release caught him off guard, jolting him and passing too quickly. Scott clenched his teeth harder as he rode his orgasm before releasing and gasping, like he'd never taken a proper breath before.

Deucalion rolled off him after another moment, shaking as he tried to regain his own breathing. They both recovered and the cloying scent at last started to fade, letting Scott's head finally start to clear. He grinned in relief, heartbeat slowing down. That hadn't been so bad. A little scary, but not bad.

Scott flinched for a moment, waiting for the darkness to lash against him, his body prepared to face the onslaught pain...but nothing happened. Scott released a long breath, unknown anxiety easing in his chest and his freedom from that horrible past truly hit him.

Several minutes passed before Scott noticed Deucalion had shifted away from him, sitting up and facing the wall, oddly hushed. He reached out and ran a hand down the strong back, fingers tracing over muscles. The older wolf gave a low growl, but refused to face Scott.

"Hey." He struggled to sit up, but managed, and slung himself to drape over the man, arms circling around his waist. "Your leg better?"

"What?" Deucalion finally glanced at him, eyes closed off. Scott slid a hand down to run across Deucalion's thigh that he'd sunk his own claws into. He felt the slight bumps of scars and frowned.

"Don't hurt yourself like that," he admonished gently.

Deucalion's hand joined Scott's. "I was worried."

"Mutilating yourself in front of me did not help." Scott pointed out, hand returning to the man's waist. "Now you're being quiet, what's wrong?" He paused as a thought came to him. "Is it me? Because I was out of it?"

"What? _No_." Deucalion turned in his arms so he was half facing Scott, eyes flashing. "You were perfect, even as you coped with new hormones you...how you understand my body is—you still take my breath away." He made it sound like a painful admission and Scott tilted his head.

"So, I'm _too_ good?" Scott smirked.

" _No_." Deucalion blew out a breath. He turned his eyes away from Scott again, being stubbornly aloof. The younger man still noticed as the back of his neck turned red.

"What's wrong?" Scott tried again, worry starting to set in him. "You're sure it's not me? I don't know why my body reacted so differently, I'm sorry if it ruined—"

"It's _me_ , Scott. I'm upset at myself!" Deucalion's voice cut in his curtness, even though Scott knew it wasn't directed at him. He growled, eyes shifting as he grew tried of Deucalion's evasive attitude. They were in a heat, he could force Deucalion to tell him if he wanted—Scott pulled back sharply on his thoughts, frightened at the path they had taken. He couldn't think like that anymore.

"Alright, I'm sorry." He felt sick again and moved away. Deucalion must have sensed his discomfort because he turned back to Scott and gripped his arm.

"Stop saying you're sorry, you've nothing to be sorry for." Deucalion seemed to forcibly relax himself, looking ashamed. " _I'm_ the one who's sorry. I suppose I don't like being reminded of my own shortcomings, but I shouldn't withdraw from you."

"I don't understand," Scott tried to push the frustration welling up in his chest down. "You looked like you were enjoying everything."

"Far more than simply enjoying," the man rolled his eyes, "if my multiple orgasms were any indicator. You...you didn't seem to be at the same level when the tables were turned, though." Scott quirked an eyebrow, still not making the connection.

Deucalion dragged a hand through his hair, eyes downcast. "I—I don't know how to pleasure you."

Scott opened his mouth as several images of Deucalion on his knees as he swallowed him down and made the younger man's knees shake; crowded his mind. Deucalion held up a hand.

"You can play my body similarly to an expert musician can his choice instrument." Which seemed a really flowery way of saying Scott knew what made him cum. The younger man tilted his head and frowned, still not following. "You know every aspect of me instinctually. It seems I do not know you the same way."

"You—" Scott was at a loss. It explained why Deucalion had asked if what he was doing felt good, why he had watched Scott so carefully. To be fair, it's not like anything he had done felt bad. Scott assumed he had been uncomfortable because he was unused to being on the bottom.

"Your scent and heartbeat don't lie," Deucalion explained, "you were uncomfortable...and scared."

"A bit." Scott admitted, swiping at his nose as he looked away. "Releasing control is hard, of course I was scared. I also didn't know what was happening with my body, still don't know. Guess I'm still a little scared. It's only fair, though, you were scared the first time I—"

" _Don't_." The venom in his voice shocked Scott. Deucalion's eyes flared red as they glared at him. "This was not the same. It—it wasn't, I didn't forced myself upon you... _right?_ "

Scott saw where the conversation was headed and stopped it.

"Of course not, sorry. I gave you my consent." But he was still troubled, that ever-lingering guilt tapping gently at the back of Scott's mind.

"My body found a hungering lust in that fear, our first time." Deucalion shook his head. "Yours does not. I don't know how to make you feel as you make me."

"That's fine." Scott shrugged and felt Deucalion jerk next to him. "We'll try again later. You seem to be forgetting I've had almost five years to learn your body. It's not like anything you did felt bad. Like you said, I was coping with new hormones."

"True." Scott privately thought Deucalion liked being hard on himself, otherwise this would have dropped by now. He decided they should stop focusing on him for the moment.

"So did you like my makeshift knot?" He made his hand a fist and watched a full body shudder go through Deucalion. The man's throat seemed to have closed as he only gave Scott a tight nod. "How do you feel?"

"Sated. Complete." Deucalion turned to bury his head in Scott's neck, scenting him out.

"It's the least I can do after...well, _before_. It must've hurt when I had to lock myself away immediately afterwards."

"It's...in the past." Deucalion said quickly, but he did not meet Scott's eyes. The guilt stabbed at Scott's chest again and he started to pull away, a strong arm pulled him back and their mouths met briefly. Scott tried to put an apology behind his movements, tried to shake his guilt but it clung to him. Deucalion drew away to suck lightly at his neck, making the younger man yelp and jerk.

"Wh-what is that?" he asked, ignoring the electricity running up his spine. "F-feels—"

"Good?"

"Like sparks jumping around inside me." Scott explained, rubbing his neck. "Never felt that before, what're you doing?"

"It's—erm, a trick?" Deucalion seemed to have to hold himself back from attacking Scott's neck again. The worst of the heat was over, but Scott knew the desire to touch him would be strong with his entire pack. "Only works for dominate alphas. Your brain is receiving conflicting signals with my teeth so close to your neck and the natural sensitivity wolves have in that area. I've been told the feeling is...unique."

"You don't know?"

"I never allowed anyone close to my neck when I was dominate." The older man looked away, eyes darkening again and Scott could tell when he was reliving memories. He took the opportunity to reach forward and lick at the bared neck, bringing his lips down to seal around flesh. "It'll feel good, to me," Deucalion grunted, squirming as his scent started to turn again, "but as a submissive I want to feel your teeth."

"Oh." Scott pulled back and smirked at the whine he received. "Makes sense."

"You didn't have to _stop_." He felt the laughter bubble up in his chest and Scott grinned. It quickly died as a wave of exhaustion rolled over him, reminding him of earlier. He fell against Deucalion's side and felt the man tense next to him.

"I think we're gonna have to wait awhile until the others get back. Still don't know what's wrong with me."

" _Nothing_." Strong arms circled around him. "Nothing's wrong with you." Scott felt his eyes drift shut, heart still uneasy, but safe as another body curled up next to his and he finally let sleep overtake him.

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone sorry for the long wait! My lease was up at my old place so I've been looking for a place to move. Found one! So now that all that drama is out of the way you can look forward to more regular updates. Thanks to everyone who has reviewed this story so far you kept me motivated while all this craziness was happening to not forget about this story.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter beta'd by the ever awesome underwater-smiles! Go check out her page here: https://www.fanfiction.net/u/3516421/

* * *

"So that was it?" Scott asked, not quite believing the explanation was that easy.

"Again, _yes_." Kali sighed from where she laid on the couch later that night. She ran a hand through her hair. "I told you after the first heat that you didn't feel much because of who you were. Now that you've bonded with the pack and, y'know, feel stuff, you are much more connected with the pack and sensitive to us."

"So this'll be a reoccurring thing?" Scott wasn't looking forward to feeling as if the slightest breeze would knock him over every heat.

"You'll adjust." Deucalion assured him, nuzzling at his neck. Being allowed to touch Scott this heat he had taken full advantage of. Derek sat on Scott's other side, pressed firmly shoulder to shoulder.

"I agree," he stated, "this was the first time your body dealt with the full onslaught of hormones the heat brings out, of course you'd feel sick. I'm sure next year it'll be different."

"Will it take a full year?" Scott asked. "This heat was really early, which also caught me off guard."

"It caught _you_ off guard?" Kali snorted.

"Probably because of you—again?" Aiden nodded. Ethan elbowed him in the ribs and sent him a sour look.

"What he meant, alpha, is about your mood last night. You...it was pretty intense. We feed off your energy and you were so excited and, I guess, happy that it catapulted us into an early heat."

Scott blinked at him. "I can do that?"

"A powerful alpha can." Kali said nonchalantly. He felt a deep growl emanate from Deucalion's chest in agreement.

"It was nice to see you that happy." Derek murmured next to him and Scott felt his face go red. He took a deep breath, calmed by the scent of his pack, and prepared for a week full of awkward touches and zero personal space.

The next day Scott found himself staring outside the window in his room, leaning against the ledge and watching the clouds pass. For a rare moment he found himself alone, able to enjoy the peace and silence. The creak of the door and a powerful scent alerted him to Deucalion's presence.

"Ten minutes. That's a record." He commented. He didn't turn around, leaving his forehead pressed against the cold glass, but felt Deucalion come to stand behind him. Strong fingers brushed gently down the back of his neck.

"You're still troubled about something."

"It's nothing." Scott lied. Deucalion didn't need to know about his crushing guilt. He had to figure this out himself. How do you say sorry for years of abuse? How do you apologize for torturing someone you lo—

"That it takes so much of your attention, even during a heat, says different." Deucalion sat on the opposite side of the windowsill, hand falling to Scott's knee where it stayed. His heartbeat jumped from erratic to monotone several times over and Scott pulled himself away from his own thoughts and looked over the other man. As usual, Deucalion looked composed enough, though his eyes were still dilated from the heat and a slight sheen of sweat covered his body, but that was just from being this close to Scott. It was his neck that was most telling, the back of it bright red in a blush.

"I'll get over myself," he assured Deucalion. "Is everything alright?"

"Of course," was said back far too professionally. Scott tried to keep from smiling, and forced his eyes to glow a deep red and Deucalion shivered at the display.

"Time to go another round, then?" Scott knew what his beta needed and he leaned forward, but a hand on his chest stopped him.

"Uh," Deucalion seemed unable to form words for a moment but dragged himself back, although he looked pained from rebuffing Scott. "What I mean is, when was the last time you ate?"

Scott blinked, caught off guard. "I...don't remember?" It came out a question rather than a statement and he pulled back, honestly trying to remember. "Yesterday morning, before the test—no wait, wasn't that two days ago? Why?" Though he knew exactly where Deucalion was going. His stomach made a weird squelching noise and Scott winced. "Yeah..." He scratched the back of his head.

"You need food, and perhaps a break from the pack." Deucalion's eyes slid to the window. "Let's go out then, I'm sure we'll find something for you."

"Are you sure it's ok to leave everyone?" Which was a stupid question because before this heat he would actively avoid his pack for long periods of time.

"They'll survive." Deucalion responded dryly.

"Guess I am really hungry." Scott rubbed at his stomach. "And it'll be nice to see this city for once."

Deucalion gave a small smile. "I'm glad you approve." The slight waver in his voice was the only clue to Scott that something was off, but he didn't notice more until they were walking to the restaurant and he ran a critical eye over the older man.

"Are those new clothes?" Traveling constantly meant very few wardrobe choices. Scott only had two complete outfits, but he didn't recognize the blazer Deucalion wore now and ran a hand down the thick material.

"Ah, yes." Deucalion quickly looked away. "Just felt like a change."

"Looks good on you—" Scott cut off and his eyes widened. "Oh my god, are we going somewhere nice? Should I have dressed up?" Not like he could have; limited options.

"What—no, it's fine."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, Scott," Deucalion said flatly. "You know me, this is typical attire for myself."

"True." Scott admitted. Although it wasn't until they were actually at the restaurant that everything fell into place. As he looked through the menu it clicked in his mind and Scott's mouth fell open, menu hitting the table with a snap.

"Is this a date?"

The world grew very quiet as both men refused to look at the other. A date. Like a _real_ date, something all couples did. A normal thing. Scott's first date had been at a bowling alley. This was at a casual but upscale restaurant. Nothing was similar but both his face and eyes burned at the thought.

Deucalion straighten his back, coughing as he found his voice and glanced up at Scott. He looked so calm and collected as he spoke, like the past four years hadn't happened, sounding like the man Scott had first met. "I'd rather hoped it could be."

The weight of those words hit Scott and what they meant, what they could mean. He opened his mouth, tried to speak, and was forced to swallow unable to find any words.

"I'll understand if this is too much for you." Deucalion jumped on his indecision. "I don't want to push." And he truly sounded like he meant it, but Scott had gotten good at telling when the man was in pain, and it radiated from his eyes even if the rest of his body screamed that it was okay. Truth was, Scott wanted this. Maybe it was all he'd ever wanted since this thing started.

"This?" he forced out. "No, this is perfect." Scott couldn't smile because then he'd start crying, but the happiness inside him was so intense it was almost painful.

Like watching a sun rise, Deucalion's smile broke out slowly across his face, starting with a light in his eyes before the creases along his cheeks became dimples and Scott realized he'd never seen the older man smile in their entire time of knowing each other. It was almost shy, a bit uncertain, like he didn't have enough practice.

"Perfect? That's a pretty high standard."

"I have faith in you." Scott gave his own sheepish grin and spent the rest of dinner with a warm, bubbly feeling in his stomach that pushed out the hunger and guilt.

"You seemed like you enjoyed that." Deucalion prompted as they left a few hours later. The sun would be setting soon, but there was still plenty of light out.

"I liked that steak." Scott agreed and intertwined his hand with Deucalion's, making the older man jolt. The hand in his was slightly larger, with soft palms and rough fingertips. A memory flitted across Scott's mind at the last time he'd really paid attention to Deucalion's hand and he quickly pulled it closer to him, bringing the fingertips to his face. "I always wondered what this would feel like..." He trailed off at the look Deucalion gave him, or rather how his face changed. He'd closed his eyes the instant his fingers brushed against Scott's cheek, jaw tight and brow furrowed. He felt along the edges of Scott's face, feather light touches on his cheeks, down the bridge of his nose, stopping briefly against his lips. On instinct Scott drew the digits into his mouth and Deucalion was forced to bite his lips to keep quiet.

"Scott!" He frantically whispered and pushed them into a small alleyway. "If you do that again I won't be able to stop myself."

Scott released his fingers and gave a sharp grin. "How did I not find out until now your fingers were that sensitive?"

"I'm surprised you didn't." Deucalion admitted, leaning against the wall breathing heavily. Scott probably shouldn't have provoked him like that during a heat.

"Why'd you close your eyes?" he asked.

"Habit." Deucalion pushed a hand through his hair, mussing it up in a distractedly attractive way. "When I was blind, that was the only way I could 'see' the details of someone's face. Even my wolf vision wasn't that precise. It's a rather intimate gesture."

"Then I don't regret doing it." Scott grinned. Deucalion's hand whipped out and grabbed a fistful of Scott's sweater, dragging the young man forward and crushing their lips together in a demanding kiss. Scott worked his hands under Deucalion's dress shirt to slide them along the bare skin underneath.

"See? I knew we weren't done yet." Scott whispered against the other's mouth. Deucalion nuzzled against Scott's neck, licking and nipping at the flesh. His eyes were bright red and scent drenched in arousal, pressed this close to him Scott could easily feel his erection through their clothes. "Since we're in the phase of trying new things—" Scott thrust forward, making Deucalion whine, "—there's been something I kinda want to try. Let me know what you think." And he slowly slid to his knees, keeping his eyes on the older wolf the entire time.

The look on Deucalion's face was priceless. His jaw slackened immediately and eyes dilated until they were almost completely black. Scott inhaled deeply and shuddered as Deucalion's scent sharpened into an intense swirl of lust, need, desperation, and excitement until it was almost cloying. An erratic heartbeat pounded wildly in Scott's ear and he watched with great satisfaction as Deucalion's entire body trembled in anticipation. Scott leaned forward and gripped the zipper of Deucalion's pants in his teeth gingerly.

" _Scott_..." Deucalion was undone by the action, his voice a wrecked sob. Scott pulled down across the heated bulge, incredibly thankful everything went smoothly as he'd only ever seen this kind of thing done in porn before and didn't know if it worked in real life. This wasn't his first time going down on a person, just a man, but he refused to let his nervousness show and grinned as he mouthed through the open folds of clothes until he could draw out his prize.

"You ever imagine me like this?" Scott edged his beta, running lips against Deucalion's cock now that it was free. He glanced up and saw that his partner's eyes were screwed shut in an attempt not to come. Scott could help with that. " _Look at me_ ," he ordered. Deucalion's eyes flew open and he bit his lips at the sight of Scott below him. "Don't come until my eyes glow red, got it?" Deucalion nodded gratefully, although it was a double-edged sword. He didn't have to worry about ending things too quickly, but now he couldn't release until Scott's command. "You didn't answer my question."

"A long time ago, _yes_."

"Let's hope I live up to you're expectations." Scott purred, bringing his hands to rest on Deucalion's hips. "I want you to watch me the entire time." He commanded and Deucalion could only tightly nod, hands coming to clench around Scott's shoulders.

Scott swallowed the lingering doubt in the back of his mind and leaned forward, brushing his lips across the tip of Deucalion's head. He swiped his tongue out, happy to see precome already beading at the tip, and trailed a hand up to grip the base of the man's cock. It felt slightly odd, as he opened his mouth to slide the heated flesh into his mouth. His cheeks stretched and Scott had to force his throat to relax, trying desperately not to gag. Deucalion was decidedly better at this than he was. Scott soldiered on, constricting his throat before pulling back to breath.

"Sorry, I'll get better," he apologized and the hands around his shoulders tightened in response. Scott pushed forward again and stuck to drawing only the head of the erection into his mouth, sucking greedily before it popped out of his mouth and he lavished it with slow licks and a hint of teeth. He was slightly disappointed that he couldn't immediately deep-throat Deucalion, but it's not like he had a lot of practice. Scott let his hand join in and danced his fingers across a thick vein running from the base of Deucalion's cock to under the head, his other hand slipped into the fold of clothes to fondle at his sac, rolling it smoothly and pressing with just the right amount of force given Deucalion's choked groan.

With a flick of his nails Scott watched as come started to steadily leak in front of his face and different instincts clawed at him. He _wanted_ so badly to be able to completely swallow his beta and watch Deucalion crumble, but Scott knew his own limitations. He tried a different tactic, darting his head forward and giving quick kitten licks to the tip of Deucalion's member. Soft and delicate he knew would be too little for the older man, edging and teasing him.

Deucalion was rigid above him, trying so hard not to thrust into Scott. His hands had left Scott's shoulders as his claws had snapped out and were currently buried deep within the brick wall he leaned against, panting heavily. A long moan was ripped from him as Scott sucked the tip of his head into his mouth, repeating the action several times before returning to his featherlike licks.

"...most beautiful—perfection." Scott caught the tail end of something Deucalion was muttering under his breath. " _My alpha_ —" The words touched something deep in Scott's chest, like a fire and next thing the young man realized he had managed to swallow half of Deucalion down, throat seizing and clenching around the intrusion.

"Shit... _Scott_." The way he said it made Scott shiver and the primal part of his mind sink himself further onto the man's erection until he had swallowed the entire length. It was difficult to breathe and his neck hurt at the odd angle but Scott was proud he managed at least this. " _Fuck!_ " Scott glanced up and met Deucalion's eyes, eyes that were solely focused on him, mesmerized by the sight before him and Scott hummed a question in the back of his throat and watched it destroy the man in front of him.

Scott's eyes glowed a bright red and he felt the skin in his mouth twitch and tighten as something splashed against the back of his throat, almost tickling. It kicked his reflexes into gear and Scott yanked himself back, coughing somewhat dramatically as his throat closed. Trying to swallow his first time had been a bad idea. It was a little embarrassing, he wasn't hurt, he just couldn't breathe.

Hands grabbed his shoulders to steady Scott and he took shaky gulps of air. "Sorry," he croaked a second later. "That's harder than you make it look." There was a snort of laughter before Deucalion pulled him forward into a powerful hug.

"Foolish, trying to show off." It sounded like the old Deucalion if not for the thread of worry in his voice. Scott didn't mind. As he pushed away, Deucalion ran a hand down his neck, eyes full of worry. "I—I'm sorry, I should have pushed you back. I just—"

"I made you lose control?" Scott grinned back and Deucalion huffed.

"Clearly."

"I'll do better next time." Scott promised, letting Deucalion help him stand up. He watched as the man tucked himself back in, a light blush still across his face.

"I'm not sure if my body can take that." The small smile gracing Deucalion's face lit up Scott's entire world.

"We're definitely going to have to play around with this role-reversal some more." Deucalion buried his head into Scott's shoulder and whined quietly, scent spiking yet again. "Maybe we should go home and try again?"

"You'll be the death of me, Scott." The young man intertwined their fingers again and they walked back out into the street. The sun was on the brink of setting, they had maybe another hour of light. Plenty of time to get home. "Perhaps we can take a shortcut?"

"Shortcut?" Scott let Deucalion tug him off the sidewalk and into the surrounding forest. The shadows were long at this time of the day, and the sun cast the world in a golden light. Deucalion's hand was warm in his and held tight, pulling him along.

A breeze ruffled at his hair and Scott blinked, memory sparking in his mind and for a moment he was in a different place, at a different time, and Allison was in front of him, smiling shyly.

Scott smiled. For once he was content on seeing the past. They were back in Beacon Hills and he was a teenager again, barely more than a boy with his ratty old hoodie on. There was no sadness in Allison's eyes yet, no darkness or the weight of responsibility.

"Scott." She giggled and it made his heart flutter. "I'm so happy for you."

Deucalion made him feel this way too.

"But you need to pay attention." Scott blinked again, harder. This was more than a memory. Even though Allison was still smiling her voice was serious. "Look out."

"What?" A coldness seized Scott's heart.

" _Scott pay attention!_ " The world snapped into focus and Scott's senses became razor sharp, too late did he sense it.

"Deucalion!" Scott threw himself at the older man just as a gunshot rang through the air. He winced as something grazed his shoulder and the scent of wolfsbane made his blood run cold. Both men tumbled to the ground and Scott used his body as a shield.

"Scott!" Deucalion was frantic underneath, able to smell the wolfsbane as well.

"Step out where I can see you." Scott growled to the shadows and trees. Deucalion grew still as he scented out the area and his eyes turned red in rage.

" _Hunters_."

"Not just any, Scott." Chris Argent slipped out from behind a large oak, gun in hand. "Looks like your reaction time has improved since I last saw you."

"No..." Panic clouded Scott's vision and he felt his body freeze. In an instant Deucalion was in front of him, snarling dangerously. "If you're here—"

"There was a rumor that you and your pack had returned to America." Chris shrugged. At his gesture, the rest of his team appeared from the trees. Nearly twenty, far too many for Scott to handle. He sagged as he realized he hadn't been vigilant enough. They had stayed in this town for too long, he hadn't done enough research, hadn't kept his ear to the ground, hadn't looked at hunter movements since returning. This was _his_ fault.

"Did Allison order this?" he asked, voice small. Chris paused and his smirk slipped just slightly, as if he hadn't expected Scott to ask that.

"She's in charge of the west coast units now, I'm not sure if word's reached her yet. I happened to be in the area and the Argent matriarch of the east coast recruited me for this. It's been a long time coming." He stepped forward and Scott felt as Deucalion prepared to lunge.

He quickly shifted his eyes to red and growled. " _Don't attack_." He made it an order.

"They mean to kill us." Deucalion whispered furiously, body fighting against the restraint. "I won't let them harm you." Scott sighed, Deucalion was blinded by the heat. Normally he would have seen their disadvantage; he never simply lashed out at enemies.

"There's too many." And Chris had wolfsbane bullets. He didn't even need to hit them in a critical area to kill. "What's your exact mission?" Scott questioned as he stood up.

"Would my answer make a difference?" Chris asked, frowning.

"Depends," Scott answered carefully. "Are you just after me or my entire pack?"

"Scott, what are you doing?" Deucalion hissed and stood up as well, whirling around to face him.

"Interesting that you would ask," Chris mused and took a step forward. "More interesting that you would care."

"Is it? They're my friends, my family." Scott ignored the man next to him and focused on Chris. "Who were you specifically ordered to kill?"

"You."

"I'll destroy you first—" Deucalion started but Scott cut him off.

"You've cornered the two strongest wolves in my pack. He's right, most of you will die." Scott glanced around and took in the numbers again. "You'll win, but most of you will die."

"We were prepared for that." Chris said sharply. "But I get the feeling you want to say more."

"If I go with you willingly, nobody dies." As soon as Scott had seen that it was Chris attacking him, the solution had appeared in his mind. A way to finally make up for all his mistakes, all the pain he had caused others. He could finally be free of this crushing guilt.

" _What?_ " Deucalion's voice held betrayal in it and Scott couldn't blame him. He grabbed Scott by the collar of his shirt and forced their eyes to meet. "You do _not_ get to do this."

"Looks like it doesn't matter what you want, Scott." Chris chuckled and Scott watched as his hunters prepared to attack. "Your beta is too loyal to let this happen."

Scott ducked his head. "I know." He felt Deucalion let go of him, instead sliding his hand up the side of Scott's face. He sucked in a deep breath and steeled himself. "That's why I'm making it an order." He lifted his eyes and met Deucalion's as they widened in shock. "During a heat, none of my wolves can disobey me."

"Indeed." Chris suddenly looked very interested and motioned his team to lower their weapons. "I've heard about that ability, but I've never seen it used in such a way before."

"If I leave with you willingly, promise not to go after my pack. It's just me you need."

"Looks like you remember my distaste for needless bloodshed." Chris said and lowered his eyes. "And that's...a very selfless thing to do."

"Do I have your promise?"

"Yes—"

" _Scott, you'll die!_ " Deucalion interrupted, eyes wild. "Stop this idiocy, now. You're behaving like a fucking child. This will accomplish nothing!" He couldn't understand, Scott hadn't told him of the guilt that was eating at him more than the darkness ever had. He'd been stupid to think he would get a happy ending.

"Maybe this is for the best...after everything I did—" he tried to say but Deucalion grabbed him by the shirt again and shook him, desperate.

"I told you, if you must pay for your crimes then so should I!"

The answer came to Scott immediately and he knew what to do. "No you don't." Deucalion opened his mouth to argue. "I can pay for both of us. I took your darkness, I can take this too." He smiled sadly; it was cruelest thing he could have said.

"Please don't do this," Deucalion bowed his own head, begging. Scott felt his heart splinter, jagged edges tearing at his chest.

Coward. He was such a coward. He was supposed to have all these amazing and superior traits of a werewolf and in the end he was just a man. A flawed young man who was too much a coward to meet the eyes of the person he loved as he sent them away. He turned his head towards Chris.

"Sorry, Deucalion. Run to the pack now, don't look back." He glanced back to his beta and ran a hand one last time through his hair. "And don't cry. I don't deserve it."

"Stupid boy." Deucalion didn't raise his eyes to meet Scott's. Fitting last words, he supposed.

" _Now_ , please."

Deucalion tore away from him. Turned and ran through the trees to where Scott knew their house was. He watched Chris' men carefully, but none tried to attack Deucalion's retreating form and he relaxed slightly.

"He might hate you for the rest of his life." Chris commented, eyes closed off. Scott shrugged.

"He should, he saw the worst side of me."

"That wasn't hate I saw just now." Chris finally walked up to him, scanning Scott closely. Judging him.

"I'd rather not talk about it," Scott said. He was ready for it to be over. He slowed his pulse down, calmed his heart and nerves, took a deep breath. This was what _should_ happen. Bad guys are punished for their mistakes; they die. He couldn't take back everything he had done over the years, but he could pay for it.

Out of the corner of his eye Scott saw one of the hunters lift their gun and closed his eyes, waiting. He might be the bad guy but he wished—

"One second." Chris said and Scott's eyes snapped open. "Just give me a moment to talk to him, for my daughter's sake. They used to be close." Scott squinted, tilting his head. The hunters muttered among themselves but Chris sent them a harsh glare and the one aiming the gun at Scott sighed and lowered it. Chris grabbed Scott's shoulder and moved him further off into the forest next to the bank of a large river, still within sight of the hunters, but out of earshot. Scott regarded the man in front of him.

"That was a lie," he started. Chris glanced over to him and shrugged. He had a few more lines on his face, but otherwise appeared the same from the last time Scott had seen him.

"My heartbeat tell you that?"

"Yes," Scott frowned, "but I didn't need it to. You're not doing this for Allison, I'm just a bad memory to her. You're doing this for you, but why?"

Chris gave a dry chuckle. "Guess I just want my own answers." He paused and sent Scott another calculated look. "You're less of a bad memory to Alison than a cautionary tale, as a friend of mine once was to me. I think, more than anything, she regrets not being able to save you." A bitter taste rose in Scott, like bile it burned the back of his throat. More reminders of the people he had failed. "I don't think she hates you, though."

"She should."

"That's just a common theme for you, isn't it?" Chris observed. "You wear self-hate well."

"Is this going anywhere?" Scott was done with Chris' stalling tactics. He knew what was going to happen; he hadn't ordered Deucalion to _not_ come back. If Scott knew the older man—and he did—Deucalion was just as stubborn as him and would gather the pack to return and fight the hunters, ending the peace he had brokered and probably killing everyone. "We don't have much time left," Scott warned.

"Do you know the stories of yourself and your pack, out in the world?" Chris asked instead. Scott rolled his eyes, irritation clear on his face.

"Sure: there's a killer boy with his bloodthirsty alpha pack wiping out anyone he runs across."

"That's a pretty tame tale, at least compared to what I've heard. What the men behind us have heard."

"Not sure why it concerns hunters so much," Scott said. "I deal mainly in wolf affairs."

"And the countless hunters you've slaughtered?" A hint of anger crept into Chris's voice at last. Scott noticed his posture change, becoming more aggressive.

"I don't know if I'd say countless." Scott looked at the ground, considering. "We weren't even interested in humans when Kali told me of the ambush. I decided on a preemptive strike. We attacked and left, the fact that hunters still came after us was their own fault."

"You had to be stopped, Scott. You were tearing through cities and causing massive destruction. I read my cousin's notes, all of us have."

"What notes?" Scott asked. "What destruction?" He thought back, trying to remember those first few months. Yes, he had killed countless werewolves, but not humans. Wolves tended to have their confrontations outside, away from prying human eyes so Scott was unsure of what destruction Chris referred to.

"She'd been tracking you for months, Scott. Documented every city you had been to and all the lives you claimed."

"You do that for wolf packs?" It made sense, Scott guessed. To track which packs were destroyed or if they moved, but still— "I kept tabs on the hunters around me. I was never tracked until I settled for a month in Brazil, humans weren't of an interest to me."

"Not just the wolves you went after, the humans who got caught in the middle." Chris crossed his arms. "If you'd just gone after wolves that's one thing, I don't deal in your internal affairs, but you know my code—" And he stepped close to Scott then, voice menacing. " _I protected those who cannot protect themselves_."

"I understand that." Scott bit back. Those were Allison's words, her code. "I'm not going to lie and say I couldn't bring myself to kill a human back then, I did so with ease when your cousin attacked me, but that was the only time. I simply didn't care about humans, they were beneath my notice. When you hunt wolves do you kill random animals that you see? No? See, same as me. I don't know what bullshit you were fed, but I didn't kill humans for fun. I regret all the lives that I took—all the alphas and their packs I massacred, but your cousin's the only one I don't. She was gathering an army! She already had close to fifty hunters with her, I wasn't going to wait for more to show up. Like you said earlier: needless slaughter."

"Why lie now, when you're about to die?" Chris fumed at him. "She had proof. She sent copies of her journal to the entire Argent family before you attacked her."

"Why would she send out copies of a personal journal right before I surprised her by my attack? It's not like any of your family would lie or falsify evidence to justify attacking werewolves, right?" Scott spit out. That Argent hunter, she'd been the same as Gerard. Lying to both sides to get the outcome she wanted. Either she would have killed Scott and been hailed a hero or died and condemned him with her journal of all his sins. "Why _would_ I lie? I've got nothing to live for, no more secrets! I've admitted I'm a horrible person who needs to die for their actions, why would I omit this one thing?"

Scott pushed a hand through his hair, frustrated and blew out a harsh sigh. Why was he fighting? He should listen to his own advice. The sun had finally started to set, sinking below the tree line and making the shadows longer. Deucalion might have reached home by now.

"You know what? Never mind. It doesn't matter. Yeah, you can put those sins on me too, it won't matter in a minute." Scott looked back down to his hands. He'd gotten slightly paler from spending the past few months inside, the crisscross of white scars covered his arms seemed to stand out. He closed his eyes and thought of calloused fingertips running down his face. "C-can we just get this over with?"

"Maybe you haven't changed as much as I thought." Chris admitted and Scott resisted the urge to open his eyes. He wanted the discussion to be over with. "I don't think that this is as much about your guilt over everything that's happened, as it is about your guilt over a certain person." Scott jerked, eyes flying open and he knew he'd given himself away. Chris shook his head.

"Just as I thought, I saw the way you two were with each other." He spoke of Deucalion. "More importantly, I saw the way you looked at him. You care enough to die for that man, but you also _want_ to die for him. That doesn't happen without great remorse."

"I—" He didn't know what he was trying to say. Only that the shame ate at him even more with what he was thinking. "Is it wrong that I feel more guilt from hurting just one person over all the others I've killed?"

"Honestly, I think the fact that you feel remorse at all is a good sign," Chris said. "You're...telling the truth about my cousin, aren't you?"

"I told you, it doesn't matter."

"It does to _me_." Chris' eyes flashed. Scott's eyes flared red in response but he tamped down his emotions.

"Yes, I'm telling the truth." Still a bit of a reckless teenager, Scott rolls his eyes again. Whatever needed to be said to make Chris Argent happy and to stop wasting time.

"I see," Chris replied softly. He looked sad, and a little angry. Fooled by a family member again. It had to keep hurting, making the same mistake. Scott looked away.

"Please Mr. Argent, you know Deucalion will try to come back with my pack. You need to be gone by then."

"Yeah." A heavy hand landed on Scott's shoulder and he jumped, startled. "You need to go, Scott." It took the young man an embarrassingly long time to figure out the hunter was telling him to leave, not that he had to die.

"What?" he asked, just to clarify.

"Go Scott, get out of here." Chris pushed him slightly but Scott refused to budge.

"What are you talking about?" He looked back through the trees where the rest of the hunters were gathered and waiting. "I'm supposed to—"

"Die? Stop being stupid," Chris cut him off, voice harsh. "Just as I'm talking to you for me—for answers, you're doing this for you. To die and pay for what you've done. You want to feel redeemed and take the easy way out." Scott felt a snarl slip out of him at the insult and tried to ignore the burn in his eyes. "If you _truly_ wanted penance you'd try to be a better person, a better alpha."

"But I don't deserve to—" Chris slapped him. The world went numb and Scott's ears started to buzz as he blinked in shock. He couldn't remember the last time he was slapped.

"You're being a child." Chris put his hand on Scott's shoulder again and the young man flinched, but the hunter's eyes had softened. "I regret my early time as a hunter. I tried desperately to hang on to a code that was already being abused to feel better about myself, but after seeing Gerard and what he made Kate, what he was doing to me and how he was using all of us to fuel his blinding hatred to kill...it's a hard thing to realize your own father killed and had you kill dozens of innocent people. I was lost. My wife and sister were dead and I couldn't find a reason to keep being a hunter."

"...but Allison..."

"...gave us a new code and a new reason to move forward," Chris smiled and Scott could see the pride for his daughter in it. He thought of Allison's smile and his heart twisted. Chris and Allison's smiles were the same. "She became her own anchor and I followed suit. From there I've sought to be a better person, father, and hunter. It's not always easy, but things worth having rarely are."

"I..." Scott wiped furiously at his face as a tear fell. He didn't know, he just didn't know anymore. It had been so long since he felt sure of himself and now he was being offered a chance to make up for his mistakes. He wanted to live, he wanted to be with Deucalion and his pack, he didn't want to die, but he should. It's what he deserved. "Bad guys don't get happy endings," he finally muttered. Chris chuckled gently.

"Sorry to break this to you, but you're not a bad guy." Chris' hand moved up to ruffle Scott's hair and it was such a parental gesture that Scott had to wipe away more tears. He missed his mother more than ever. "You can do this, Scott."

"Yeah, ok." Scott took a deep breath.

"Fight to be better," Chris encouraged and pushed Scott away again. "Now ru—"

"Argent!" Chris and Scott both jerked as one of the other hunters came stomping over to them. "What the hell are you doing?" He pulled out his gun.

"Scott, _run_!" Chris yelled as he drew out his own pistol.

"Fucking traitor!" The hunter yelled as the two men leveled their guns at each other. Scott was torn.

"What about you?" he tried to call to Chris.

"I'll be fine, now run!" the man snapped at him and Scott turned, planning to leap across the river to make his escape. He heard the sound of a gun going off but didn't expect the white hot jolt of pain to sear through his leg and he collapsed with a cry, clutching at his left thigh. The scent of wolfsbane made his head spin and Scott realized he was a dead man.

" _Scott!_ " More gunfire went off as Chris shot the hunter in front of him. The others started coming through the clearing and he was forced to roll behind a tree for shelter. Scott watched as the older man fumbled with his gun and removed a bullet. "Scott, here!" Chris threw him one of his wolfsbane bullets, a cure for the one currently coursing through his body. The air was filled with the sound of bullets as Scott reached out, hand straining to catch it when something brushed against his neck.

It only felt like a gust of wind or a hand sliding across his skin but Scott suddenly saw blood everywhere, all around him in a large puddle that steadily grew. His body had already gone numb and he slowly lifted his hand to his neck, feeling himself grow light-headed at the sensation of his own blood squirting through his fingers. This was too much blood too fast.

Scott stumbled, feet landing in the water and the pressure of the current pushed against him. Chris was firing back at the hunters and yelled something to him, but Scott couldn't hear. Looked like he got his wish; he got to die a villain. The water pulled him under and Scott winced as he felt the bite of wolfsbane in his bloodstream. His vision started to black out. This was just like when Deaton pushed him down in that bathtub, it felt the same, darkness creeping into his sight and claiming him.

He hoped Chris wouldn't die too.

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh god.....I'm so sorry about the cliffhanger! Please don't throw anything at me. *dodges trash* I just---drama! It makes a good story--*get's impaled by angry readers*
> 
> To be fair Scott has a bad habit of dying in the canon series too. So this is very in character.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter beta'd by the ever awesome underwater-smiles! Go check out her page here: https://www.fanfiction.net/u/3516421/

* * *

Derek sighed loudly to alleviate some of the stress. His skin felt too hot and tight for him to fit in; he flexed his arms and rolled his shoulders. Ethan giggled behind him and the older boy almost snapped.

" _What_ do you two want?" his voice dripped with venom.

"I've never seen a werewolf so frustrated that he started doing dishes." Aiden snorted. Both twins were lounging on the couch watching him with rapt fascination as Derek angrily scrubbed at soapy dishes and muttered to himself.

"Fuck you both." He replied eloquently.

"I can't believe you're not happy for our alpha." Ethan shook his head. "I've never seen Scott happier. Or Deucalion."

"It-it's not that," Derek defended.

"He's upset that he's no longer the favorite," Aiden teased. "You're not the only one who can touch him anymore."

"That's _not_ it." Derek swore to himself he wouldn't break any dishes. Mainly because Kali really liked the design and would kill him if he did.

"I wish they'd hurry up," Ethan admitted. "It's the first time Scott's letting us touch him during a heat, it's really nice."

"What, so you can cuddle him again? He's our alpha, not a pillow." Aiden scoffed. Derek heard without listening as the twins bickered. Seemed like Scott really did have the rest of the pack fooled, or maybe they just weren't worried.

He was.

For how close the rest of the pack believed Scott and Deucalion were, it was the older wolf that was most blind when it came to Scott. Derek knew depression, knew what it looked and sounded like, how it came in ebbs and flows, not a constant stream. Derek had seen the signs in Scott for a long time now, but nobody else appeared worried. They either seems to think it was a phase or that Scott could simply be fixed.

That was not how depression worked.

Worse, Scott's depression came from guilt and Derek knew firsthand how that felt. He'd been hoping Scott's growing relationship with Deucalion would help, and it did at times, but then it also seemed to make things worse. Deucalion was the reason for so much of Scott's guilt. His alpha would break at some point and Derek refused to let that happen. He should try to talk to Scott sometime today or tomorrow.

"—even Kali came back early. I hope all our future heats are this smooth." Ethan continued as Derek's attention came back to their conversation.

"Think they'll start a courtship?" Aiden asked suddenly and Derek snorted with laughter.

"I don't think Scott even knows what that is."

"Oh yeah..." Ethan sighed. Aiden frowned and crossed his arms, determined to think of something. Derek huffed and rolled his eyes as he went back to the dishes. God, he really was becoming domesticated—

The door slammed open with such force that the hinges almost fell off. Derek jerked, soapy water flying, as both twins tumbled off the couch in a flurry of confusion. The intruder was Deucalion, doubled over and gasping for breath.

Something terrible had happened.

"What the fuck—" Kali yelled as she stomped downstairs.

"Hunters." Deucalion cut her off, the pure panic in his voice made Derek's blood run cold. " _Scott_." When he looked up his eyes were wild and heavy with pain. "He forced me to run."

Derek was already out the door. The wind ripped around him as he followed Deucalion's scent into the forest. Stupid. Scott was stupid. _He_ was stupid for waiting so long to talk. He couldn't—Scott couldn't die. Not like this. Distantly he heard the rest of the pack following.

"Why would he do that!?" Ethan seemed the most confused, his voice small and hurt.

"He's being a fucking idiot." Kali cursed. Derek jumped as he felt Deucalion run up besides him; the older wolf should be exhausted and unable to keep up with him. Derek and Scott were the fastest out of the entire pack.

"I thought he ordered you away?"

"Didn't order me not to return." Deucalion responded shortly. "Maybe...he meant—" Derek doubted Scott meant for Deucalion to come back and save him, but he couldn't bring himself to say the words. Scott was trying to sacrifice himself, he was trying to take the _easy_ way out.

Derek wouldn't let him.

They raced through the forest, the pounding of the pack's heartbeats loud in Derek's ears. The world a blur of color and smells, like a kaleidoscope nothing was in focus until a certain scent halted Derek in his tracks.

Blood.

Scott's blood. Gunpowder and human sweat coated the area as well, but the sharpest scent was blood.

"Scott!" Deucalion's voice made Derek wince. The older wolf was completely panicked, eyes wild as he searched.

"Hunters?" Kali asked, voice strained but calm. Derek scanned the forest with red eyes but everybody seemed to be gone, Scott included.

_"Scott!"_

Derek swallowed the lump in his throat. He looked up at the sky as the last slivers of light peaked through the trees, illuminating a river. A feeling of dread pulled Derek's feet towards it, his senses on overload and he blinked when he came upon a large bloodstain. _Too large_. A hit in an artery or jugular to bleed that much. Wolfsbane bit at his nose and Derek forced himself to turn away.

"Guys..." His voice cracked, he could barley keep his composure. His friend, his alpha, his brother. Derek was left behind again, trying to track down someone he loved only to find them dead.

The pack ran up to him. "Th-that's a lot of blood..." Ethan trailed off as the scent hit him. Scott's scent. " _No_."

"There had to be at least 20 hunters here. I don't—" Kali kicked at the ground, sending a shower of bloodied pebbles into the river. "Why the fuck—stupid child! Pointless! Just pointless!" She turned away and continued to yell, claws and fangs bared. Derek let her vent, let her mourn.

Ethan had run into the river, still searching. Aiden followed him, but his face was closed off and blank.

"He probably jumped into the river to lose the hunters!" Ethan called out to the others. "If we just go down river we'll find him waiting!"

"Ethan..." Aiden tried to reach out for him brother but the twin shook him off.

"He's injured! We have to go now!"

"Ethan, stop."

" _Let go of me!_ "

Derek watched both men break down simultaneously as Adain finally grabbed a hold of his brother. Derek blinked again as he realized he'd started crying. A crunch of gravel pulled him away from the brothers and he saw Deucalion had kneeled where the bloodstain was, quiet but hands clenched and shaking by his knees. The amount of pain in his eyes tore at Derek's chest, making it hard to breath.

"Deucalion?" It was odd, after his frantic yelling earlier Derek hadn't expected Deucalion to take Scott's death so...quietly. The older man's hands dug into the dirt beneath him, claws out but completely silent. His eyes finally met Derek's.

"He ordered me not to cry, I-I can't—" Deucalion's voice choked off and he lowered his head, bangs falling across his eyes. Derek felt his heart stutter and couldn't understand why Scott would do something that cruel. He stood next to a river and watched as Deucalion's body shook violently, eyes squeezed shut in agony, but unable to do more.

It started to sprinkle; clouds unnoticed in the fading light. Derek listened to the sound of his pack mourning and felt a gaping hole in his chest. Deucalion couldn't cry, but _he_ could. He screamed, howled long and bloody until his lungs were about to burst. Derek tried to put his anger, misery, betrayal, confusion, and pain into it. His entire body hurt when he finally drew breath again, ragged and hoarse. He looked up towards the moon that was just beginning to shine, peaking from behind clouds and wondered why Scott—why _everybody_ —kept leaving him.

Why was it his curse to outlive the people he loved?

The pain turned to anger and the anger became fury. _Hunters_. They took—his mother, his family—now _Scott_. Derek's body burned and his eyes darkened to a blood red. Kill. He had to kill them all.

" _Derek_." Kali's voice was as raw as Derek felt, but the rage in her eyes matched his. Blood dripped from her palms as she clenched her hands, claws out and digging into her skin. "We hunt."

"We don't rest until all of the humans are dead," he agreed. The twins looked back and forth between the two of them, their misery still outweighing their anger. "We _make_ them pay."

"No." Deucalion stood up suddenly and Derek frowned, unable to believe what he was hearing.

"You—" His breath left him in a whoosh as Deucalion slammed into him, the sound of gunfire roaring in his ears.

" _Ambush!_ " Deucalion yelled, shielding Derek with his own body. Derek felt the spray of dirt as bullets pelted the ground around him. Shit, they'd been so focused on Scott no one had noticed the hunters lying in wait. The stench of blood had covered their scent and Derek's own grief had blinded his other senses. Fool.

Kali screamed, sounding feral and charged at the nearest hunters. It was futile for Derek to call after her, she was lost to bloodlust and revenge. He struggled to his feet, anger welling up in his gut as he prepared to charge.

"There's too many." Deucalion cautioned, voice harsh and strained. Regular bullets bounced off of him as he shielded Derek. "Retreat would be wise—Ethan!" He yelled out to the twins, both at a disadvantage thigh deep in fast-running water.

"We're fine!" Aiden returned, both young men fully transformed and savage, throwing stones with the force of bullets. They had taken shelter behind a large outcropping of rocks jutting from the middle of the river. Derek whirled upon Deucalion.

"Retreat?" he hissed.

"Unless you'd like for the rest of the pack to be killed like dogs." Deucalion answered sharply. Derek growled, wincing as a bullet whizzed past him too close for comfort. "We can't win like this Derek. This isn't justice, its suicide and we'll end up dead and Scott unavenged!" That finally got through. Derek glared at the older wolf but saw the wisdom in his words. Scott had sacrificed himself so they wouldn't die, Derek couldn't fuck this up now.

"Retreat!" He sounded out, crouching low as more bullets flew his way. Deucalion was the only one that seemed immune. The smell of wolfsbane quickly brought that thought crashing down and Deucalion flinched as one ripped through his arm. Derek grabbed him and threw them both behind a tree. "Fall back now!" He looked over Deucalion's arm.

"It's fine, went right through. No poison." The man shook him off with a growl. "I got lucky, but if they keep firing wolfsbane that'll end quick."

"Kali now!" Derek ordered. He saw as the she-wolf ripped out one hunter's throat before darting into the forest, making her way towards them.

"I don't see Argent anywhere." Deucalion noted distantly. "His scent's gone."

"Who cares—Aiden, Ethan!" Both twins struggled to move through the water, hesitant to move from their cover and into the open. Rock and water splashed around them as bullets riddled the surrounding area. "They're trapped." Derek felt his voice catch.

Hunters began to emerge from the trees, circling the wolves and leaving little room for escape. Kali appeared next to Derek, out of breath and drenched in human blood.

"It's hopeless." she noted. "Best to charge and take as many as we can."

" _No_." Derek clenched his teeth, fangs showing. "We have to survive this!"

"I'll draw their fire away from the twins." Deucalion interrupted, preparing to sprint. "Wolfsbane bullets are a precious resource, very few of the hunters actually have them. Once they cross the river, run and regroup."

"Oh god," Kali rolled her eyes, "I can smell the chivalry dripping off you. Going to nobly throw yourself into the line of fire while we run? Typical. The boy rubbed off on you."

"Deucalion, don't—" Derek never got to finish that sentence. The twins acted before anyone else could as Aiden charged at the hunters closing in on them. Ethan made a break for the rest of the pack, eyes haunted, and Derek watched as the events played out in front of him.

Aiden made it to the other shore before being hit with a cascade of bullets in the chest and fell. Ethan nearly made it to them before a bullet pieced his right knee as he collapsed with a cry. Kali was there in an instant and dragged him into the shadows of the trees.

" _Aiden!_ " There was cold terror in Deucalion's voice as he leapt out to help and Derek found their positions reversed as he tackled the man to the ground, knowing it was too late already. "No—"

The gunfire ceased momentarily as the air went still. Kali and Ethan lay under a tree as she tried to staunch the bleeding. Derek and Deucalion were sprawled in the dirt as Deucalion struggled to reach Aiden; the young man lay in the sand of the opposite shore that grew red with his blood, breathing shallow and pained. The hunter stepped over him and cocked his gun.

Derek felt frozen as he heard the gun click and fire. Deucalion's scream was drowned out by a roar and that's when everything went to hell.

 

* * *

 

There was a blur of motion and blood spayed everywhere. Derek must have jerked in shock because he found himself knocked back, face pressed against leaves and twigs. He twisted around, blinking and trying to rub the dirt from his vision, eyes widening when he saw a hulking wolf standing over Aiden, snarling at the hunters. Blood dripped from it's head where the bullet had grazed.

For a moment Derek imagined dark, matted fur and a slightly hunched back, but the wolf wasn't Scott's form. This one was just as large, but it's fur was a thick luscious gray and white, body muscular with large paws and an exceptionally fluffy tail.

"Aiden!" Deucalion called out and everybody snapped from their stupor. The wolf became another blur and tore through the hunters closest to it. Aiden flinched at the commotion and tried to curl to make himself less of a target. Deucalion tore away from Derek and made for the younger man.

"Well I'll be damned," Kali chuckled from close by. "A gray wolf. Not surprising."

"How could that possibly be unsurprising!" Derek threw at her.

"They're common here in Michigan." Kali suddenly appeared next to Derek, helping a limping Ethan. "To it, we smell like fellow wolves and it probably thinks it's protecting pack." Derek glanced over to see Deucalion had made it to the other side of the river and dragged Aiden back behind a large driftwood tree that was on the shore bank as the hunters had turned their attention to the rampaging gray wolf. Wolfsbane would have little affect on a regular wolf, although normal bullets would be just fine...if they could find their target.

The wolf was never still, darting faster than the eye could see and decimating the crowd of men. The hunters tried to scatter but that was when Deucalion struck, ripping into them as their backs were turned.

"I have to help." Derek rushed headlong into the fray, practically leaping over the river to come crashing down on a fleeing hunter. He tore the gun out of the man's hand and slashed out his throat, uncaring as blood drenched his shirt. As distasteful as it was, Derek lifted the gun and started picking off the hunters that had made it to the trees. He wasn't used to using a weapon but the long range of the gun was useful. The gray wolf took off after the last of the hunters disappeared into the forest, only the yells and screams of men it chased indicating it was still hunting.

"Aiden!" Ethan called out as Kali helped him across the river. Derek dropped the gun and rushed over to the fallen wolf. Deucalion beat him and roughly grabbed the young man's blood soaked shirt.

"What were you thinking, you idiot!" His fangs were still extended and Aiden flinched, eyes filled with tears. Derek grabbed Deucalion's wrist.

" _Calm down_ ," he ordered. It had little effect, Deucalion submitted only to one alpha.

"We lost one of the pack already!" Deucalion shook Aiden, voice cracking. "You think sacrificing yourself would have truly saved your brother!?"

"I'm sorry—"

"Did you even think before you threw your life away?"

"Deucalion!" Derek snarled and snapped at Deucalion's neck. The distraction worked and he dropped Aiden, eyes flaring red as he growled at the challenge. "Aiden's _not_ the one you're really upset at."

"I—" Deucalion's mask of anger slipped for a second and Derek saw the anguish underneath.

"I'm sorry," Aiden repeated, openly crying now. "I'm sorry." Deucalion's whole body suddenly sagged and he collapsed in the sand next to the young man.

"You foolish boy," he muttered. "Remember that others would suffer if you died." Aiden nodded, wiping at his face.

"Aiden!" Ethan and Kali finally reached them and the twin dropped next to his brother, clutching his shoulders. "He's right, you were being fucking stupid."

"I take after our alpha," Aiden said quietly, coughing up blood immediately after.

"I got it," Kali sighed as she leaned down and brushed her hand across Aiden's neck. Black veins rose from her skin as she took his pain.

"Y-you don't have to—" Ethan tried to reach out but she batted his hand away.

"You're injured, loser, concentrate on healing yourself first."

"We were fortunate." Deucalion spoke up after a long moment of silence. The screams of the hunters had finally faded and Derek knew they were all dead. "We would have died if not for that wolf."

"Lucky for us," Kali grinned. It was strained from the pain but genuine. "Tore those hunters apart like they deserved. _Justice_."

"Why was he alone?" Ethan asked, massaging his knee as the wound slowly closed up. "Where's his pack?"

"Depending on his age he may have left it and is looking to start a new one." Deucalion answered mutely, eyes unfocused as he gazed off into the distance.

"Speaking of which..." Derek pointed off further down the shore where a gray wolf sprung out from the bushes. It's head tilted and it scented the air before turning towards them and carefully making its way over.

"It apparently likes us." Kali commented. The wolf stopped a few yards away, body language cautious as it looked them over.

"Thank you." Aiden called out and Ethan snorted.

"It can't understand you, moron."

"Shut up, I can still thank it."

"We should move out." Kali pulled her hand away, sighing deeply. "The stench is almost unbearable. Human blood mixed with wolfsbane, ugh."

"I agree." Derek said. "Are you two alright to move?"

"I think." Aiden sat up and winced, blood seeping through his shirt anew. "Maybe not..."

"I'll help him, my knee is mostly healed now." Ethan stood and grabbed his brother's shoulder, supporting Aiden as he focused on healing. "Idiot, you're hurt bad."

"Learned it from our alpha," he grinned but it died after a moment and both brother's went quiet.

"Deucalion?" Derek saw the older wolf was still lost in thought. He looked out and saw the blood-soaked ground surrounding them, bodies strewn across the sand and rocks. The sun was finally gone and the sprinkling had intensified, the moon peaked from behind the clouds and lit up small patches of the river. It was beautiful and horrifying. "Deuc—"

"We can leave," was said so softly Derek thought he'd imagined it. He reached out to touch Deucalion but the man growled. " _Don't_." Derek let his hand drop. The wolf perked up at the motion and made it's way closer.

"He wants to be pack?" Ethan held out his hand. The wolf padded up and sniffed it, pressing its head against his palm a moment later. "He's bleeding."

"It's where he got shot protecting me." Aiden confirmed and reached out to pet it too. "Look, he also got hit in the leg and the fur around his neck is red."

"Just leave it," Kali said, arms crossed. "The mutt will find another pack."

"Harsh bitch," Aiden muttered. The wolf wagged its tail at his undertone and promptly stopped, turning its head as if in surprise.

"What? First time you've seen it?" Ethan asked and the wolf answered in a huff, causing both young men to smile. Derek knew what they were doing; it was a distraction. Nobody wanted to get up and start back home, no one wanted to return to the reality where their alpha was dead.

"Let's go." Derek agreed with Kali and turned to leave. The rain was light but it had still drenched through his clothes. He wanted to go home and take a shower, rinse off the scent of blood and pretend his brother wasn't washed further down the river. He wouldn't even get to bury Scott. " _Come on_." The twins finally heeded his command and began to move out with Kali. Derek looked down at Deucalion again. "We can't stay here."

"I know." His voice was hollow and empty. The wolf looked up at their voices and moved closer, focusing its attention on Deucalion. The older man regarded it. "A _gray_ wolf?"

"It came and helped us, remember?" Derek tried to keep the alarm out of his voice. Deucalion and Scott hadn't been mates, but Derek had heard horrible stories about what death did to that type of connection. How the severed bond caused the remaining wolf to go insane, or lose the will to live completely.

The wolf stuck its snout in Deucalion's face and scented him out, licking at his cheek a second later, tail wagging once more. It abruptly stopped, again, and looked at it's tail curiously.

"Anubis?" Deucalion asked and the wolf's ears twitched. It sat back and whined, head tilting. Derek stepped forward and grabbed Deucalion by the arm, dragging him up.

"Focus," Derek pleaded. "Don't fall apart like this." The wolf watched the two of them, eyes a soft brown. Derek swallowed tightly as they reminded him of Scott. He pulled Deucalion with him as they waded into the river, the rest of the pack on the other side already.

"He's following you." Ethan pointed and Derek glanced behind to see the wolf step into the water, limping slightly from its injured leg.

"Just ignore it." Kali rolled her eyes. Derek pushed forward through the water, wincing as it rose to his waist and the undercurrent tugged at him. It would grow stronger in the rain, Scott's body would probably never be found. He blinked away the tears trying to form in his eyes and trudged up from the shallows onto the shore, Deucalion trailing behind him.

A yelp grabbed Derek's attention and he watched as the wolf struggled to cross the river, paddling across the deepest part but getting pulled away by the current. At its panicked whine Deucalion reached out and grabbed it by the scruff around its neck and hauled it over to dry land.

"Great, now it's just going to keep following us." Kali glared and flicked some of her hair out of her eyes. "Should have just let it get swept away."

"What— _no!_ " Ethan's jaw dropped. "He just saved us! That's cruel—"

"Life's cruel." Kali snapped back with venom and Ethan flinched.

"It'll get the picture eventually, let's keep moving." Derek said. He watched carefully as the wolf licked at Deucalion's fingers in thanks for the rescue, pressing it's side up against the man's legs. "Deucalion..." Shit, this was going to keep happening. The older man seemed to be stuck in a permanent daze now that the danger had passed. Derek pulled him away again as the wolf shook it's fur dry, nearly tumbling over with the force of its thick coat.

"Ha, you're right. He must not be that old." Aiden commented and both twins chuckled, though the sounds were empty to Derek's ears.

"Fuck, this is stupid. I'll just beat it so it'll run away." Kali growled and her claws slid out. Derek should have been alarmed, but honestly Kali didn't handle emotions well and violence was her first response to anything.

"Don't!" Ethan staggered forward. "Please Kali!"

"Fine, we'll just keep walking!" Aiden caught his brother but both moved to block her path. "No more interruptions."

"Kali, _back down_." Derek threatened, stepping closer. She glared at him, fangs pushing out and dangerous. "Let's just go back to the house." He tried to bargain, attempting to keep things civil.

"Who made you alpha?" She growled and Derek felt his eyes fall shut. He'd hoped the inevitable power struggle could be delayed until the pack was in a better mindset. They were too torn, too frayed right now. Ethan and Aiden wanted a new pack member, Deucalion wanted his lover back, Derek wanted a brother, and Kali needed a leader. Their instincts screamed for something they could not find and it was about to bubble over.

"We'll follow your lead Kali, let's go." Ethan spoke up quietly, surprising everyone. "I don't want anymore fighting." Kali pulled back, seeming to realize what she was doing. The air was still tense with clashing emotions but the she wolf suddenly released a long sigh.

"Stupid brat," she muttered and walked away. The way she threw the words made Derek think she wasn't talking about Ethan in that moment.

Aiden kneeled down next to the wolf. "You guys keep going, I'll keep him occupied so he stops following us."

"Ethan go," Derek touched Deucalion's arm to pull him away but the man stayed firmly where he was. Eyes downcast and glazed over. "Deucalion..."

"Shit, just let him stay here." Kali called back over her shoulder, water running down her face as she glared. She could have been crying in that moment, Derek would never know. Ethan came up behind Deucalion and touched his elbow lightly, asking permission and wrapping a hand around his arm when no sign of resistance appeared.

The younger man led Deucalion away and Derek followed, Kali leading them further into the forest towards home. A barren home that would hold no more warmth. Derek looked over his shoulder one last time; the world dark and wet as the trees and branches moved in the faint wind making the shifting moonlight dance as it broke through the clouds. Aiden was kneeled down, shirt soaked in blood and head low as his fingers combed through the wolf's fur, dropping to it's forelegs and the sound of his sobs reached Derek's sensitive ears.

He turned away, looked forward and promised to keep his eyes there. At least until the entire pack froze as Aiden's heartbeat went through the roof and he gasped loud enough for even a human to hear.

" _Scott?_ "

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like to thank everyone who commented last chapter, that was really nice to see. I'm going to try and get the next chapter up ASAP for you all!
> 
> Also, first time writing in Derek's POV, hope I did the guy justice. He's such a different mindset from Scott.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait, there was a death in the family I've been dealing with for the past month. Made sure the chapter was extra long to make up for it. Thank you to everyone who had reviewed this story! It helped me keep writing.
> 
> This chapter beta'd by the ever awesome underwater-smiles! Go check out her page here: https://www.fanfiction.net/u/3516421/

* * *

Scott found himself floating through a sea of pain. Well, less floating and more being pulled. The sting of wolfsbane running through his blood as the water suffocated him. Pulled further and further under until the light was completely gone, only darkness and pain. His leg felt heavy, the one that had been shot, blood pouring from the wound as his hand brushed up against it. A bump in his pocket and like a spark of energy Scott remembered his charm Derek had given him, the bullet filled with wolfsbane.

The _bullet_.

Scott didn't even have a chance to think, his body reacted on instinct. Claws pushed through his fingers and ripped into his jeans, finding the bullet and crushing it over his wound, water and wolfsbane seeping through and mixing with his blood. Scott screamed as it burned, but it was a good pain. The type that signaled his body was healing as the poison was flushed from his system.

His head broke above the water and Scott gasped. It quickly spluttered into a cough as he tasted blood...his neck. There was only one thing to do; Scott squeezed his eyes shut and forced himself to change. A different pain took over as his features twisted and changed. The world flickered and jolted in front of his eyes and Scott realized he was draped in the sand, gulping in deep lungfuls of air, panting desperately as the water lapped at his paws.

The light was fading. Scott coughed up water and watched as blood soaked the damp sand. His neck was no longer spurting blood, but his leg still bled even if wolfsbane no longer spread through it. He continued to lay there, simply breathing before Scott realized he was still alive. He wasn't—he _survived_. Why?

Scott felt a weak growl slip from him and he clenched his jaw, fangs showing in a snarl. He had accepted death, right?

Or had Chris' words struck something deeper inside, something that pushed passed the guilt? He had wanted to die, but he had something— _someone_ to live for. He sucked in another gulp of air, doing everything in his power to keep breathing, struggling to survive. Maybe this was Scott's answer.

He blinked as it started to sprinkle, raindrops sticking to his whiskers. The light had faded even further. He must have passed out for a minute. Scott rose on shaky legs, half his body still drenched in water and his fur clung to him. Distant sounds reached his ears and he felt them twitch. Screaming. Gunfire. Fighting of some kind was still happening. Chris had tried to save him, the least Scott could do was repay the favor. He took a step forward and the world seemed off to him.

Scott shook his head, the fur around his neck splattering blood and water into the sand around him. His senses were...different. He couldn't pinpoint what it was, but it was as if he was looking at everything for the first time, new and unfamiliar. Except it wasn't. His ears twitched again as the distant noises came to him and he burst off into the trees. His leg burned as he ran but Scott ignored it.

The river had taken him a far way down and Scott was at least two miles away from where he and Chris had spoken, almost to where the river passed through the heart of the city. That would have been awkward; his dead body fished out in the middle of downtown...one of his pack coming to claim him. Scott's eyes unfocused as he remembered Deucalion's last words to him, his refusal to meet Scott's eyes.

He needed to apologize for putting Deucalion through that. Scott had a lot to apologize for.

Dirt and dead leaves tore under his paws as Scott raced through the underbrush, the light sprinkle of rain becoming a little heavier. The gunshots ceased as he drew nearer to the battle and in the distance Scott saw the hunters gather around a body close to the bank of the river. His eyes narrowed and then widened as he realized it was Aiden and a Hunter was pointing a gun at him. His pack, his friend.

Scott saw red. A crack of thunder and a sharp pain blossomed along his forehead. Scott found himself standing over Aiden. His pack mate bleeding heavily from multiple shots to the chest, breathing and heartbeat erratic.

" _Aiden!_ " Deucalion's voice snapped Scott out of his stupor and he whirled around.

His pack was hurt. These hunters had tried to kill his pack. _He had to protect them_. Scott's body moved on its own and he slaughtered the men around him, teeth and claws tearing at flesh. Blood flew around him, righteous anger coursing through his veins.

The men tried to scatter, but Deucalion was at Scott's side in an instant. He whipped around the older man's body, defensive and lashing out at the same time. When the few remaining hunters tried to run Scott pursued them. He leapt into the forest, the rain not yet strong enough to block out the scent of fear and sweat as he closed in on his prey.

It was only after Scott had killed the last of them, fangs dripping with blood and chest heaving, that he realized Chris hadn't been with them. Scott lifted his nose and scented out the area, but no trace of Chris could be found. Perhaps he has escaped? Scott whined and looked around. He hoped that's what had happened.

The rain started to come down harder as Scott made his way back to his pack. They were going to be furious with him, Deucalion especially. He huffed as he found the river bank again and looked around, finding the others gathered close by. Scott picked his way over the scattered bodies and rocks outlining the shore, stopping at the look he received from his pack. They didn't look angry; if anything they appeared exhausted, and miserable.

"Thank you," Aiden said and Scott internally breathed a sigh of relief, at least until Ethan replied.

"It can't understand you, moron." Scott frowned, or tried to. What were they going on about? He could always understand human speech in this form, although they may be referring to his head wound. Scott twitched his ears. Yeah, he could feel the blood matting his fur. Actually, he was a little nervous about transforming back to human, he wasn't sure where the wound would appear on his head or the damage it could cause.

Scott's neck ached too and the burn in his leg made itself known again. He was in a pretty sorry state, all things considered. Deucalion's voice pulled Scott's attention back to the present as his beta snarled at Derek, eyes full of anguish as he breathed out an uneven sigh. It tugged at Scott's heart and he moved closer.

Ethan said something but Scott didn't quiet catch it, too focused on Deucalion, but when the older boy stretched out his hand Scott couldn't deny his pack mate comfort and walked up, pressing his forehead against Ethan's hand and breathing in his scent.

"He's _bleeding_ ," Ethan gasped.

"It's where he got shot protecting me," Aiden reached out as well and patted Scott's head. "Look, he also got hit in the leg and the fur around his neck is red." Honestly, they were taking everything a bit too well. Scott winced as his head throbbed in pain, like fire spreading across his skull and he missed what Kali said.

"Harsh bitch," Aiden muttered darkly and that sounded more like his pack. At least everybody was safe, that's what mattered. Scott jerked quickly as he realized his tail had started to wag on its own. He squinted, or tried to make a facial expression, as something about his tail caught him off guard. His fur was soaked in water from the rain and matted to his skin but his fur looked thicker than usual. His entire body felt slightly off, but Scott had just assumed it was the blood loss talking.

"What? First time you've seen it?" Ethan grinned and Scott huffed in annoyance. Well, maybe no one had been that worried to begin with?

"Let's go," Derek called to the pack and turned to leave. Scott let him take the lead, not like he could give orders in this form anyways. Deucalion seemed to be the only one in a state of shock, his scent muted and body closed off from the rest of the pack. Fresh guilt sprung up in Scott as he watched the older man kneel in the sand, despair written on every line of his face as their eyes met.

"A gray wolf?" he called. Scott hesitantly made his way forward, paws cautious on the sand, unsure if moving closer to Deucalion would help or worsen matters. Why had he called Scott gray? In this moonlight and rain his brown fur should appear black.

He paused directly in front of Deucalion, trying to convey with his eyes how sorry he was for putting him through that terror. Scott leaned forward, licking gently at the man's cheek. He paused as he felt his tail move on it's own accord again and looked back at the offending appendage. Seriously?

"Anubis?" Deucalion asked softly and now Scott was thoroughly confused. He sat back and whined, tilting his head. Alright, something was definitely off. Had Deucalion been injured? He was mistaking Scott for a fictional wolf, although—the memory of his conversation with the white wolf in the Between Realm came back to Scott, and the gray wolf that had met his eyes there. Why would Deucalion think of that now?

"—fall apart like this." Scott caught the tail end of Derek's sentence as his brother looked panicked at Deucalion's behavior as well. Derek met Scott's eyes as well and quickly looked away, pulling Deucalion up with him and towards the river bank where the rest of the pack had already crossed. Had something else happened Scott wasn't aware of?

He needed to stop almost dying, this couldn't be healthy for the pack's mentality.

Scott winced as he stepped into the river, back leg flaring in pain. His pack was speaking again but the words just filtered through his head, nothing being processed. Ethan may not have been far off when he said Scott couldn't understand them right now. His focus and hearing seemed severely impaired from his head wound. Still, he had to solider on. Scott pushed forward further into the water, ignoring his wounds and using his claws to dig into the sand and rocks to pull through the undercurrent. At least until the water became too deep. Scott yelped as he lost his footing and tried to paddle, feeling stupid as he imagined the sight he must present to the rest of his pack.

Strong hands gripped the fur around Scott's neck and lifted him up out of the river. His paws gently touched solid land and Scott gave a sigh of relief as Deucalion released him. He clearly wasn't speaking to Scott after what the young man had put him through, but at least he still cared. He licked at Deucalion's fingers in thanks, still worried at the blank stare he received from him. Scott pushed himself against the man's legs, circling around Deucalion, whining softly. Worry ate against Scott's chest as still nothing happened.

"Deucalion..." Derek wrapped a hand around Deucalion's elbow and led him away. Scott's instincts took over and he shook the excess water off his coat, nearly tripping. God, he was so bad at this wolf stuff, even years after he'd been bitten. He heard Aiden's laugh and looked up just in time to hear to Kali.

"Fuck, this is stupid. I'll just beat it so it'll run away." Scott's jaw almost dropped as she looked right at him, but her eyes were wrong. There was no hate in her gaze, just pain...and no familiarity.

Wrong. Something had been wrong since his pack had first seen him—no, since Scott had first transformed. He looked back to the river but the rain would make it impossible to see a reflection. Voices rose in anger and Scott felt his heart beat faster at their distress. Why didn't anyone recognize him?

Scott looked down at his paws, covered in sand and dirt, nothing looked too different. His ears twitched as he focused on his claws. Now that he thought about it, his nails had always been bulky and chipped before. These were long and smooth. What—

"You guys keep going, I'll keep him occupied so he stops following us." Aiden was suddenly in front of Scott, kneeling down and running a hand along the top of his head. Scott blinked. He watched as his pack walked away from him and confusion welled up tight in his chest. What was happening? Why did no one see him?

Aidan cried as he sat in front of Scott. His shirt was covered in blood and his shoulders shook and he tried to stop and breathe. He looked so young to Scott in that moment. The older boy's hand fell to Scott's front legs as he stroked the wet fur, wiping at some dirt that clung to it. Scott stared at his arm, his fur was really light now that he paid attention. It wasn't brown at all anymore. Aidan's hand stilled on Scott's arm as he parted some of the fur and saw the skin underneath, dyed black in a band.

Scott's tattoo was still there.

Aidan's eyes met Scott's as his heartbeat skyrocketed.

" _Scott?_ "

 _Finally_. Scott rolled his eyes, literally, and no wild animal does that. The next thing he realized the air was forced from his lungs as Aidan crushed him in a bear hug. Scott yelped in surprise and wiggled away, wincing as he put too much pressure on his leg.

"Oh my god, oh my god!" Aidan kept chanting as turned frantically around. "Guys come back!" He spun around to Scott again. "You! What happened!? You look different."

Scott stared. Hard. Aiden paused and realized he was asking questions his alpha couldn't respond to. He wiped quickly at his face a released a shaky breath.

"Oh my god, you fucking asshole." Scott coughed, or made some weird choking noise, as he tried to laugh but couldn't. He let the curse slide because honestly he deserved it. Aiden hugged him again and Scott saw over his shoulder the rest of the pack cautiously approach.

"Aiden...?" Ethan called out, voice thin and worried.

"Shit, he's cracked." Kali said flatly, unimpressed with the display.

"No, I didn't," Aiden snapped back and turned to face them. "We all noticed how odd this wolf was acting, we just didn't ask why." He lifted the fur on Scott's arm to show his tattoo. "He's been trying to get us to pay attention since the beginning."

That was giving Scott more credit than he deserved but sure, he'd play along. Scott swatted Aiden's hand with his paw and rolled his eyes at the looks he received.

Derek practically leapt forward and fell to his knees, hands shaking as he checked Scott's arm for himself. "Please...please," he kept whispering and the heartbreak in his voice tore at Scott. He pressed his forehead against Derek's and whined softy. "It's _really you_."

At Derek's confirmation Ethan stepped forward as well, face breaking out into an overjoyed smile. Kali and Deucalion were the only ones to keep their distance. Kali's face distrustful with a frown while Deucalion's was blank and closed off, eyes haunted.

"That's not Scott's fucking form, idiot." Kali cursed. "They don't change fur coats to match what's in style. Use your brain, it's probably just a birthmark. Stop fawning over some mutt."

"Christ's sakes Kali just come here and look!" Derek whipped back, eyes growing fierce. "What wolf rolls it's eyes?"

"It's just—" Kali hesitated. "It doesn't work that way. He doesn't smell like Scott, he could be another werewolf, it could all just be—"

Scott sneezed. Loudly. He wiped at his snout with a paw and shook his head. His coat was drenched in rain water and he was freezing, but he looked back up at Kali to let her continue her rant. She stared at him, face unreadable and Scott tilted his head, asking silently for her to keep going and the woman in front of him burst out laughing. She quickly stopped and clapped her hand over her mouth, looking mortified.

"It's Scott." Derek repeated just as fiercely as before. He turned back to his alpha. "Why didn't you just change back earlier? Would have saved a lot of trouble."

Scott bared his neck, even as his fur bristled at the action and it felt wrong. Derek's fingers brushes across the tear in his fur where he was still bleeding sluggishly.

"That's where you got hit?" Scott nodded.

"You saw that pool of blood by the river," Aiden said to the others. "He probably had to transform immediately before he bled to death."

"And you can't transform back now," Derek continued. "Otherwise you'll just have a gaping neck wound again."

"And now a head wound." Aiden added, face miserable with guilt.

"He also probably thought we were smart enough to figure out it was him in wolf form." Kali snorted.

"Did you even realize your form had changed?" Derek asked and Scott shook his head, wincing at the pain it caused. It wasn't missed by his pack and they crowded closer to him.

Everyone _but_ Deucalion. The guilt and anguish eating at Scott's chest grew agonizing at the look he received from the older man. He was shaking, Scott belatedly realized, there was a fine tremble running throughout Deucalion's body, like he was about to break if he moved.

Scott's body moved without his consent, towards Deucalion. He belatedly realized his tail was tucked between his legs as he did so. His snout touched Deucalion's fingers, brushed against his skin and the man let out a small broken noise. Scott moved closer and licked gently at the cold skin of Deucalion's hand, knowing the gesture wasn't enough, knowing Deucalion was too hurt to feel anything else.

"We should go back," Derek said quietly after a long moment. The pack watched as Deucalion stayed absolutely still and Scott's ears drooped, the feeling of defeat consuming him as his partner failed to react.

" _Deucalion?_ " Adian's voice sounded small and Scott glanced over, surprised at the fear on the older boy's face. Ethan looked just as worried.

Kali walked up to the older wolf. "Your alpha's alive, you're either happy or you're not. Figure it out." Deucalion finally seemed to snap out of his daze and his eyes cleared, meeting Scott's this time.

"You..." He looked wretched, and hurt. His eyes haunted and dark, new lines around his face that Scott didn't remember before. The rain came down ever harder and Scott shivered in the cold, trying desperately not to break the moment. But his movement finally pulled Deucalion out of his inner turmoil and he looked around, as if noticing the rest of the pack for the first time. "I...yes, I agree. We should return to the house." He turned quickly and walked away without looking back.

Apparently there was going to be serious fallout for Scott almost dying...again.

"So dramatic," Kali muttered under her breath.

"He'll be fine, right?" Adian looked to the others.

"I honestly don't know," Derek frowned. "He's reacting like—" He stopped himself and shot Scott an unreadable look. After another moment Derek shook his head, wet hair sending water droplets flying in every direction. "It's not your fault, Scott. How he's handling this isn't your fault."

"Of course it isn't," Kali agreed. "Once you're able, though, you two should have a long chat." She pushed her long, drenched hair out of her eyes, looking greatly annoyed. "He's been keeping secrets too."

"You were totally right." Ethan whispered to his brother but neither seemed reassured by that, both still pale and shaken.

"Let's go," Derek repeated. "I'm sick of being here." And the pack finally started to move out. Which was incredibly difficult with wet fur and several bullet holes riddled throughout your body, Scott found out very quickly. The soft dirt swallowed up his paws and the dark trees in front of him spun dangerously. The cold wind and rain bit at his body, the fur doing nothing to help. Probably just the blood loss talking.

"Derek..." Ethan was trailing behind the others, staying close to Scott as he lagged.

"Scott," Derek turned and jogged back to him. Scott's wet fur clung to him uncomfortably and he tucked his tail closer to him, dropping his ears and whining. Derek came up to him and then quickly away making a choked coughing noise Scott realized was laughter. He figured he painted a pretty pathetic picture. "You looked like a drowned puppy, I-I shouldn't be laughing." Derek confirmed.

"Too much blood loss," Kali stated. "Everyone does realize it's a miracle this kid is still alive, let alone standing? I'm surprised he hasn't passed out yet."

Scott didn't want to be dramatic or anything, but passing out felt like a wonderful idea. Derek reached down and scooped him up in his arms.

"I got you." He reassured his alpha and Scott tried not to think about how awkward this must look. They continued back towards the house, catching up with Deucalion a few minutes later. Although his face was stormy, his façade cracked when he saw the state Scott was in. "Too much blood loss," Derek reassured the other alpha and kept walking, arms tight around Scott. "He couldn't walk anymore." Deucalion flinched at the words and his eyes almost met Scott's again before he turned away again, anger flashing across his face.

Scott deserved it, so he didn't mind. He settled against Derek more and let his body heat sooth him into a light slumber.

"...Scott?"

_"Scott!"_

Scott jerked awake and blinked as he realized it had stopped raining. Actually he was just inside now, the rain could still be heard outside, pelting down against the window. Derek and Kali were sitting in front of him.

Scott looked more closely and realized they were back in his room, the dark red walls and oak trim with several of his books splayed out across his desk calmed him down. A familiar sight and scent of his den spoke to a primal part in his mind. Scott looked down at his hands and saw they were still paws. Kali patted his neck and Scott realized something was tied securely around him, pulling uncomfortably at his fur.

"It's just gauze." Derek said quietly and pointed to Scott's leg which had a gaping bullet wound in it, had also been wrapped up now. "This will help you heal quicker. W-we tried to take your pain but..."

"We couldn't." Kali shrugged, looking entirely too unconcerned about it. "I'm guessing you're just too stubborn."

"It could be something serious, Kali." Derek looked appropriately alarmed.

"No, I know what it is." Kali argued. "This kid likes to keep his pain to himself, and he's a powerful enough alpha to do so. You and I aren't going to be able to do much." She shot a pointed look across the room. Scott craned his neck, somewhat painfully, and saw Deucalion sitting on the bed with his back to them. "That was a fucking invitation to jump in," she clarified.

"My words are for Scott alone." Deucalion finally said. He didn't turn to face them.

" _You_ —" Derek made a move to leap up and attack, eyes burning with rage. Scott issued a sharp growl. _Don't Derek._ The older boy dropped back to the ground, exhaustion taking over his features.

"We'll let you get some rest, Alpha." Kali said as she stood up. "You need it."

Derek reached out and pet the top of Scott's head, mindful of the bullet wound. "Thank you," he said, voice close to a sob. "Thanks for not giving up and dying." Scott whined softly, laying his head on the ground and watching his two pack mates leave. Derek shot Deucalion a dark look before snapping the door close.

The moment settled into a strained silence.

Scott tried to collect his thoughts, but he realized Deucalion's anger at him was justified and let that rest on him. His pack was safe and alive, that's what mattered. Deucalion had started to say something to him but Scott was fading, he was so tired and the rain and thunder lulled him to sleep.

 

* * *

 

Scott awoke the next morning to a plate of food in front of him. Bacon, eggs, and a rare steak that smelled amazing, but after another moment he realized his wasn't hungry. His head was killing him and he was still tried, even after sleeping the entire night. Scott raised his head and looked around, Deucalion wasn't in the room. He rested back on the floor and drifted again into sleep.

 

* * *

 

He woke up again to more food in front of him. This time a water bowl had been placed next to it and Scott realized the steak had been cut up into tiny pieces. He lapped up some of the water and a feeling of drowning overtook him, Scott stopped and pushed the bowl away with his nose. He looked at the food and contemplated eating it. Who cooked it?

Scott lifted his head and looked around. It was night and he saw Deucalion's form lying on the bed. From his heartbeat Scott could tell the older man was awake but he said nothing. Scott flopped down in a huff. He looked back at the food and realized he still wasn't hungry.

He fucked up, Deucalion could be mad with him for as long as he wanted.

Scott glanced at his window and looked at the stars, glittering in the darkness. They danced in front of him as he fell back asleep.

 

* * *

 

The next time Scott woke up there was a different plate of food in front of him. A note was next to it saying ' _Bark when you wake up and we'll eat together_.' Based on the scrawl it was Derek's handwriting. Scott smiled in his mind and inhaled the smell of the paper, taking in Derek's own scent of ash and sandalwood.

Moving seemed like too much of an effort and Scott sighed as he stayed curled up. With his ears he could tell he was alone in the room. Further away he heard Derek's heartbeat, anxious and quick. The twins were even further away, their heartbeats the same. He couldn't hear Kali or Deucalion's.

Scott yawned and looked at the food, feeling nauseous. Maybe tomorrow...

 

* * *

 

"...Scott?" A vibration like thunder echoed through Scott's body. He felt cold. " _Scott?_ " A hand touched him and Scott instantly knew it was Deucalion's by the rough fingertips. His tail wagged on its own. "—ott! Scott look at me!"

The hands were on his face now and Scott was floating. He was so happy for some reason. He drifted away again, content.

 

* * *

 

"—need you to open your eyes."

"Fuck you, Scott, open your eyes."

"Has he eaten anything the past week?"

"Someone was _supposed_ to stay with him and check."

" _Don't push me, boy_."

It was too noisy. Scott frowned, he couldn't sleep with all the commotion. Something was peeled away from him, like a second skin, and several people gasped.

" _Shit_."

"Scott, open your eyes!" That was Derek. He didn't need to sound that worried, Scott was just tired.

"Wait, why hasn't he healed?" Ethan's voice.

"Healing can be affected by mood." Adian replied, voice quiet in a way that reminded Scott of when his mother told him his grandmother was sick and in the hospital, that she wasn't going to come back out.

"Wake up!"

And someone smacked him.

It sounded like Kali's voice and Scott was hardly surprised. He finally opened his eyes and huffed dramatically, but it was ruined by a roar and Scott was greeted with the sight of Deucalion throwing himself at Kali; both tumbled to the floor snarling.

It kicked his heart rate and blood pressure up and Scott scrambled to sit up and the rest of the pack panicked.

"What the fuck are you doing!?" Derek screamed, eyes bloodshot with dark circles under his eyes.

"Get him off of me!" Kali shouted. "He's gone feral!" The twins were already on Deucalion, trying to pry him off. He snarled at them, murderous eyes only for Kali. Scott struggled again to get up but his body wouldn't respond, it felt too heavy.

"Stop! Please stop!" Ethan was begging and Scott realized his was bleeding from a gash across his cheek. What the hell had happened to Deucalion? Scott's mind whirled as he tried to think. He seemed to be the least concerned with Scott's recovery, how long had he been asleep.

"Deucalion, stand down!" Derek dove in but Scott saw the hint of gray start to creep across Deucalion's skin as he transformed. This needed to stop _now_.

Scott squeezed his eyes shut. A memory, a memory. He searched for something, anything. At a pained howl Scott's mind flew into the past. In a dark forest with red eyes chasing him until his chest felt like it was about to collapse. Far past fear into pure terror he had run; branches scratching his face and arms, tears in his eyes. _I don't want to die. I don't want to die. Please, I don't want to die._ Were his only thoughts until he felt the white hot pain tear at his side and he screamed. Falling and tumbling through the dirt, at least Stiles was safe—

Scott gasped, sitting up as he snapped out of the memory. His pack was still fighting in front of him, Deucalion nearly fully transformed. He placed his hands on the ground to push himself up, only to slip and scrabbled as his paws were unable to find leverage. Scott backpedaled. Paws? He looked as saw he was still a wolf.

_Oh shit._

Now he started to panic. Reliving a memory had always worked before, why not now? Was he trapped this way forever? His final punishment?

It was fitting, sure, but right now Scott needed to be human. He needed to contain his pack before they tore each other apart.

He had to become human _now_.

Scott blinked. He was kneeling on the ground, legs crumpled under him awkwardly and arms shaking trying to hold him up, but they were human arms. The suddenness of his transformation almost made him pass out again—oh, and Scott's leg was sluggishly bleeding across the floor as was his neck and head, dripping in front of him. Be careful what you wish for, wasn't that how the saying went?

Screaming and yells pulled Scott back to the present. He felt a vein twitch in his forehead, which squirted blood from his wound, but Scott ignored it and made his voice ice as he spoke with the authority years of living in darkness had granted him.

" _What the fuck are you doing?_ "

He let the venom slide through his voice, loud without yelling with the power of an alpha behind it. The entire room froze and all eyes went to him. Scott hoped he looked pissed enough, naked and bleeding all over the floor but with eyes a glowing red and fangs fully bared.

Immediately Deucalion reverted to his normal form, and Kali shoved him off, deep gouges in her arms slowly healing. The twins and Derek released Deucalion and the room stood still for a moment. The moment flickered and suddenly went dark and Scott blinked, eyes going unfocused.

"Shit, did the power go out?" He looked around and tried not to flinch at how much blood he could feel under his fingers. "If you all would just behave I wouldn't have to transform before I healed." Scott gave an irritated sigh. "And possibly blow out the power circuit."

"The lights didn't go out, Scott." Derek answered, the quiet horror was back in his voice. The searing pain in Scott's head finally made itself known and he connected the dots.

"Oh." Scott brushed a hand against his head, where the bullet had torn through the scalp. If he remembered his anatomy class correctly then—that made sense. Scott fell back against the bed. "The occipital lobe deals with visual processing, I think. Ha." He let a shaky laugh out. Sleep sounded like a great idea. Scott's leg, neck, and head were burning and he just wanted to rest.

"Don't fall asleep again!" As if reading his mind, there was a flurry of movement and hands grabbed Scott's shoulder, fingers digging into his skin. Derek's scent washed over Scott. "You have to eat! You need to let one of us heal you. _Shit_ , you've lost so much weight. Scott!" He was shaken roughly and Scott winced.

"Derek, I'm fine. Just haven't been very hungry." The world became weightless for a moment and Scott lost his sense of self. He slumped in Derek's grip and was shaken again.

"Kali, get more bandages now!"

"They won't help—"

" _Do it!_ " Derek's voice turned back to Scott. "Scott please let me start healing you, _please_." It felt like something reached into Scott then, deep into his chest and pulled. Scott stared down, he couldn't see anything but he guessed he was looking at his chest right now. The pulling sensation stopped abruptly, like there was a wall. "Scott, stop it! Let me do this!" The feeling of being pulled increased, almost yanked, but it didn't hurt. Scott blinked and arched an eyebrow.

"I'm not doing anything."

"You have to be!" Derek's voice was almost hysterical.

"It's unintentional." Deucalion's voice was almost unrecognizable it was so hoarse. Either he had been screaming for hours or hadn't spoken for days. Scott's heart rate picked up and he took a deep breath.

He deserved this.

"I'm fine, Derek. I'll heal on my own." He brought his own hands up and pushed Derek away. His vision flicked and he saw for just a single moment Derek's pale face, eyes full of heartbreak. The world went dark again and Scott smiled. "Don't look so down."

"Scott, you're killing yourself." That hurt. The smile slid off Scott's face. "Whatever you're thinking, whatever is building up inside of you, just let it go. You need to let it go, it's killing you."

"No, I'll heal. Stop worrying." Scott was so tired. His pack wasn't tearing themselves apart anymore so he wanted to go back to sleep. "Just need to sleep a little more."

" _No_." Derek pulled him upright and wrapped his arms around Scott's shoulders. "No more sleep for you. I'm taking you to my room and we're forcing you to eat."

"You're not taking him anywhere." Deucalion spoke again, a dark note in his voice. Possession.

"Why? So you can watch him starve on your fucking floor? You've shown how much you care—I don't trust him with you anymore." Both wolves growled. "You're a shit mate, Deucalion—" The roar was deafening and there was a flurry of movement next to Scott. He wasn't sure how, since he couldn't see, but his body knew how to move. Derek was on his right and Scott's arm shot up to protect the other boy's neck, flinching as teeth tore into his skin. It felt so right, like true justice and Scott didn't even feel the pain.

"I said to _stop_ fighting." He sounded so calm to own ears. The teeth quickly let go of his arm as someone coughed, choking and spitting. Scott always figured his blood tasted horrible.

"Scott..." Derek's voice cracked.

"I get it." Kali's voice sounded from the doorway, it was flat and a little bitter. "I understand what you're trying tell us, Alpha."

"Hmm?" Scott tilted his head. "I've made it pretty clear; please stop fighting."

"Yeah, but that's not all," she spat and then took a deep breath, like she was collecting herself. "When you're gone, I'm out of here."

"What are you talking about—"

"You three out, if Deucalion wants to kill a weak alpha that's his business."

" _What!_ "

"What!?"

"I'm not—I didn't mean—" Deucalion's stuttered, and there was something fragile in his voice, beneath the roughness, Scott couldn't place. "It was an accident!"

"You're not trying to save him so you might as well kill him." Kali's voice became harsh. Silence overtook the pack and Derek's grip on Scott was crushing.

"Kali...give me the bandages." Derek finally asked softly.

"Like I said: they won't help. The kid's going to bleed out on the floor regardless of what you do now. He's stopped healing completely."

"Adian, we're leaving." Ethan spoke up suddenly, his voice emotionless. "We can't help right now."

"What are you talking abou—"

"We're leaving. I want to spar outside, let's go." There was a scuffle and Scott figured Ethan dragged his twin out as their heartbeats got farther away.

"Maybe all that schooling really did make them smarter," Kali muttered under her breath. Her breath shifted, like she turned her head. "You too, you can't help anymore."

"If you think I'm leaving Scott to die with this asshole, you've got another thing coming." Derek's voice tightened, as did his grip on Scott. It was really painful now. "I'm not leaving you Scott, don't worry."

Kali made an agitated noise. "Stubborn boy."

"It's fine Derek." Scott sighed and turned his head into the crook of Derek's neck, scenting out his brother. Ash, like after a fire. Sandalwood that was uniquely his, and past that he smelled like the forest in Beacon Hills. He smelled like _home_. Maybe that's how Derek had always been able to calm him.

Home sparked memories of Stiles and his jeep, the hunk of metal that always broke down at the worst of times. Of him and Scott stranded on the side of the road numerous nights while Stiles tried to fix his baby, chatting a mile a minute about random subjects. Home was where his mother was, in the house passed down to them from his grandparents, otherwise she would have never been able to afford it. Making do on what little money they had, of still being able to come home some nights to a cooked dinner that always tasted amazing, of shopping at second hand stores and Scott trying his hardest to make his mother feel good about it.

Home was where Alison's smile was.

Scott didn't remember falling asleep, he only saw flowers in the rain.

 

* * *

 

A sharp pain in Scott's neck jolted him awake and he slapped someone in the face, hand meeting rough stubble.

"What the fuck!?" Scott grit his teeth and felt the bite mark. It hadn't broken the skin but everything in his body screamed in protest. His eyes were still out of commission but when Scott inhaled there was only one scent around him. "Where's Derek?" he asked Deucalion.

"Kali had to drag him out, he panicked when you fell back asleep." Deucalion's voice had switched to a monotone and Scott felt something painful twist in his chest. Based on how sticky his skin was, his bleeding hadn't stopped.

"Why'd you wake me up?" Scott dropped his arm to the floor listlessly and leaned back against the bed. Everything was probably soaked in his blood by now. They were never going to get their deposit back. "Wanted me conscious when you took me out?"

"Wh-what?" The monotone was quickly abandoned and Deucalion's voice slipped into confusion and pain. "I'm not—I don't want you _dead_ Scott. Why—"

"You're giving off a _strong_ vibe." Scott grinned as he thought back to a previous conversation. Deucalion's heartbeat became erratic.

" _Look at me_."

"I can't."

" _Try_." Scott did, he honestly tried to force himself to see, to switch to his wolf vision, but nothing worked. He wasn't healing so his sight was going to stay broken.

"Sorry," he finally sighed. He listened and become conscious of the rain still outside. This was some storm. Scott blinked and realized his breathing was labored, his chest felt constricted, almost like an asthma attack. He grimaced.

"Why are you so _fucking_ calm?" Deucalion asked, sounding so far from calm Scott wondered if maybe there was something wrong with him after all.

"Not sure, guess it's because I deserve this." There was a frustrated scream and the room shook as there was a crack from the wall behind Scott. He was hauled up into a better sitting position; his vision flickered for just an instant and all he managed to see was Deucalion's eyes, crimson in color and full of rage. That was expected. Scott groaned as his body protested at the movement.

Everything was on fire, his whole body burned. He was dropped suddenly and Scott collapsed back against the bed, unable to even try and sit up. Hands caught him before his head collided with anything. trembling hands. There was a long moment of silence as Deucalion tried to compose his breathing.

"Scott, have you ever loved someone?"

"Yeah."

"Do you know what it's like; to follow a trail of their blood and all you find is a large puddle of it? Just their blood. Not even a body, but you look at their blood and know it's too much. Have you ever had to do that?"

"No."

"Do you know what true despair and fear feels like? To hate someone you love so much you wish you had never met them, but can't bear the thought of having never known them?"

Scott thought of Allison and when she had only looked at him with cold hate. "I—yes."

Deucalion's body stilled and he finally let out a sob. It wracked his entire body and Scott felt someone burry their head into his neck. Deucalion wept, muffled by Scott's skin and the younger wolf winced at the layers of pain he could read in it.

"I thought you were dead and I couldn't even cry." Deucalion gasped wetly into Scott's chest. "You stupid boy, you show me light and then snatch it away." His breath stuttered, Scott could feel hot tears on his skin that burned hotter than any of his wounds. "I wanted to _die_. I looked at my future and it was dull and lifeless. The colors were gone again and I _hated_ you."

Scott took a shaky breath. He _deserved_ this.

"When I first saw you, as that wolf, I thought maybe I had died. I wanted to be judged, for that gray wolf to look at me and tear my throat out. But it wasn't Anubis, it was _you_." Deucalion's voice sounded like broken glass is was so coarse, nearly incomprehensible, but Scott understood every word. "You just popped right back in, threw yourself in front of danger and nearly died again to protect your pack. I couldn't...I didn't know what to say. What _could_ I say?"

"It'd have been easier if I had died." Scott finally responded. He couldn't really move his body anymore, it just felt like dead weight. "That's why you didn't talk to me, right? I waited, but I realized you didn't want to see me anymore and it made sense. It's alright to hold onto that anger, I deserve—"

A snarl cut him off and Deucalion bit his neck again, this time Scott felt as it pierced through his skin. It felt horribly wrong and all his senses kicked in to protest, but Scott couldn't move. His strength was gone, spread out across the floor in a dark stain.

" _Ow_ ," was all he could muster. The pain went deeper, to his heart and Scott finally felt tears slide down his own face. Deucalion pulled back quickly, like he had expected something else. Scott started to drift again and his head fell forward, he didn't even have the strength to lift it anymore.

"Scott?"

"I never told you, did I?" Scott said softly, "how much I love your voice? It sounds nice, always has."

"Scott, _stop_." The words were a command but Deucalion suddenly sounded desperate. "Stop it, please."

"I'm really sorry I put you through all that." And there was that childish voice of his. So stupid, Scott didn't want to sound anything like a child. "I'm sorry you couldn't cry. I didn't mean to take the light away from you. I didn't mean for a lot of things."

"Scott, stop it!" A hand pressed hard against his chest. "Shit, please, please work. Dammit." The hand pressed again but Scott felt nothing. "I can't...fuck, _I can't_."

"What's wrong?"

"I can't...I can't take away your pain. I'm sorry. I'm _so_ sorry."

"It's fine."

"No it's not—why can't you ever accept that!? Fight, just fight Scott it's what you're good at!"

Scott huffed a pained laugh. "Not really—"

" _I'mscared._ " Deucalion said the words so fast Scott wasn't sure what he'd said. Thankfully Deucalion repeated himself. "I was scared, that's why I didn't talk to you." Something deep within Scott shifted at his words.

"What?"

"I was angry and scared. Angry at you but also myself, absolutely terrified that this was just a dream that you were actually still dead, and so sure that I would ruin everything if I even touched you." Scott heard Deucalion's heartbeat hammering in his ears. "But god—I _never_ wanted you dead. No, why, why would you _think_ that? I'm shit at feelings, you know this, took me almost five years just to realize I liked you. I was terrified at being in the same room as you, I couldn't sleep I thought you would die if I did."

"Why'd you leave, then?"

Deucalion's whole body started shaking then. "I don't know," he admitted, voice haunted. "I ran like a coward. I didn't realize you weren't eating. When I came back and saw you in the same position, with your food untouched I knew I'd made a mistake. I panicked, but I didn't know what I could do for you...I was still angry with you but confused and afraid this was all my fault—again. And it _was_. You thought—think, I want you dead. I don't. _I don't, I don't, I don't_. How many ways can I say it? Stop saying you deserve this. Just stop. There's only one thing that stops a wolf from healing: guilt. Stop feeling guilty for no reason."

"No reason?" Scott couldn't move, couldn't see, was so close to death if he actually thought about it he'd be terrified. "No reason?" His voice was calm again, but it was a calm with horror behind it, like ice. Scott knew what to say, what he really had to get off his chest, what had been eating at him for years.

"Deucalion I hear your screams at night when I dream."

"Wh-what?"

"They're dreams, but worse than that they're memories. I don't need to make up any of the scenarios I dream about, I lived them all. I watch myself torturing you again and again and I listen to your screams. I see myself enjoy it, get off on it. I watch as I break you over and over as you beg me to stop and I don't—and I didn't—I'm covered in your blood and the blood of everyone I've ever killed and hurt and when I wake up...I see you. Acting like everything is fine, _loving_ me, pretending I didn't split your skin with my hands or break your bones. I see you cry when I say I'm going to die and it's not deserved. I thought maybe I could try for redemption but every night I'm reminded why that'll never happen, and every morning I wake up and see the person who I hurt the most—"Oh god he was going to say it. "—the person I _love_ back so fiercely it hurts, but that I wounded worse than his most hated enemy. And you say I have no reason?" Scott grinned. "This guilt will haunt me forever, Deucalion. I can't escape it, so I might as well pay for it. It's the only thing left to do. Thinking you wanted me to die only made it easier."

Scott was glad he couldn't see, because he could feel tears falling onto his face and knew he wouldn't be able to handle the sight.

"Let's agree to disagree on this subject, alright?" Scott sighed. "I deserve to die, I deserve this pain." The pain had spread everywhere, his entire body was numb with it.

"You... _stupid_ boy." The anger in Deucalion's voice only made Scott smile harder. "That spark, where is it? I fought for you, please—please fight for me."

"I—" Scott paused, everything paused. The world stopped for a moment. "What?"

"It took me awhile, I admit, but I finally looked passed my own pain to see yours. Do the same for me, _please_. I'd like to think I'm worth fighting for, I know you are."

Simple words. Such simple words.

"You..." Scott felt a fury sweep through his chest and clenched his hands. The pain in his body was suddenly barely there, a footnote to everything else. "You fucking bastard." His tears had started again, but of rage. Scott pushed himself up on shaky arms and his vision flickered and he met Deucalion's eyes with his own. " _Why would you say something like that?_ "

"I mean it." Deucalion didn't look apologetic, he met Scott's eyes and held them, even if they were full of fear and anxiety. Scott fought to stay upright but his vision flickered again and he fell back. Deucalion held firm and pulled him close to his chest. "More than anything," he whispered, "I wish you'd stop paying for my sins."

"Yours?"

"I was the one who started us down this path."

Scott thought back. "Yeah, I guess so."

"No one steps up and pays for another man's sin, accepting all the guilt and taking as his own. There are no exceptions! Not even for someone you love. "

Scott huffed, still letting anger course through his body. "I can try."

"You...stupid boy."

Scott realized he was shaking, not in anger or pain; he was trying to hold on. He felt sick, weak, and hungry. He'd lost too much blood.

"Well if you don't want me to die then you'd better grab someone quick." His guilt wasn't suddenly gone, but he couldn't just lay down and leave anymore. He could see Deucalion's pain now, clearly, and the fear of losing Scott and being alone again—of losing the only person who's nature wasn't directed at selfish desires. "Ever heard the story of the Scorpion and the Frog?" he coughed, struggling to stay awake. Deucalion was yelling for someone. "I always hated that story."

* * *

 

[ ](http://s25.photobucket.com/user/BlackOrigin/media/jadedshard_by_danzzila-d8p4oi8_zpskezwsw2r.png.html)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These two are so stubborn. Scott probably needs a lot of therapy by this point. 
> 
> Guilt is a heavy thing. We all knew this was going to catch up to him.
> 
> Artwork commissioned by danzzila over on DeviantArt.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter beta'd by the ever awesome underwater-smiles! Go check out her page here: https://www.fanfiction.net/u/3516421/

* * *

There was something sticky on Scott's lips. He licked them and tasted honey.

"What the—?" he jerked awake and headbutted Ethan.

"Ow!" Both cried out, clutching their foreheads.

"Ethan _why_ are you smearing honey on my lips?" Scott asked, trying hard to be patient.

"Well, I wasn't going to throw up in your mouth," the older boy countered, still rubbing his forehead. "It's been hard to get food in you. We've only managed water and broth."

"Seems like that'd be enough for me." Scott spat, his lips sticking together and he was forced to keep licking them. He paused and looked down at himself. "Hey, I can see!" His vision flickered and went out. "Just kidding, apparently," he sighed. "Looks like I'm not bleeding out anymore."

"Yeah, once you let Derek take your pain you immediately started to heal. Your leg should be better, same with your neck. Your head and arm are the only thing still healing."

"My arm?" Scott felt the bandages and frowned.

"Um...from when Deucalion bit you— _accidentally_."

"Oh, yeah," Scott scratched the back of his head. "It wasn't that bad, wonder why it's not healing?"

"You must not want it to." Ethan's voice wavered, like he thought he was speaking out of turn. Scott shrugged.

"I guess not." He tried to put that thought aside. "How's the floor look?"

"We're never getting our deposit back."

"I figured. People still trying to kill each other?"

"Kali's upset with Deucalion for attacking her, Deucalion is upset with Derek for trying to claim you, Derek hates Deucalion for abandoning you."

"Oh my god they are worse than children." Scott would have slammed his head into a wall if it wouldn't have killed him.

"I know."

"Wait—what do you mean claim me?"

"It's nothing, they've been working out their aggression in sparring, all three of them. I think it's better now. It will be once I say you've woken up."

"Sparring? Is everyone alright?"

"No one lost any limbs." Scott tried not to let his jaw drop.

"Um, listen, before you tell them, maybe I could get some actual food to eat? I don't think I can deal with those three on an empty stomach."

Ethan's voice perked up. "You're hungry again?"

"I dreamt of that steak I never ate." Scott lied and by the whoosh of air Ethan had jumped up.

"Ok, ok I'll be back in like ten minutes. There's that sandwich place close to us, I'll run there and back."

"Lot's of meat, please."

"No problem." Ethan's footsteps dashed out of the room and Scott only felt slightly guilty for lying to him. He really did want that sandwich.

Scott swung his feet over the bed and touched the floor carefully, feeling the cool wood beneath his toes. He listened intently; it was _still_ raining. Or maybe it had been stopping and starting again and he just kept missing when the sun was out, but it was just a light rain now.

He concentrated and pushed the pain in his head out and away from himself. His vision cleared and Scott breathed in relief. His arm twinged and he looked down, dark red spots dotted his gauze in the shape of a bite mark.

"A mystery for another day." Scott said to himself and rose out of bed, nearly tumbling down again. He looked down at his naked body and winced. He really _had_ lost a lot of weight. Still, werewolf strength counted for something, he quickly threw on some clothes and a jacket before opening his window. The air was bitterly cold but Scott didn't care as he slid out and ran towards the forest.

His pack was going to freak when Ethan got back, but he'd answer if they called out. He just needed to be away to figure things out. Scott ran until his legs and chest burned, he ran until he reached the river. The same riverbank he'd nearly died at. His blood had long been washed away and the bodies were gone but the sight still sent of shiver through Scott's spine.

He collapsed on the ground, breathing hard. He was _really_ out of shape, it was disgraceful.

Scott thought back to Chris' words, _"If you truly wanted penance you'd try to be a better person, a better alpha."_ If Deucalion was going to make him keep living then Scott had to get past this guilt, or at least put it behind him, _something_. If things kept going the way they were he was never going to feel free again, and he'd just drag his pack down with him. But how do you atone for so much sin? Scott knew it couldn't be as simple as 'being a better person'.

He knew he could never be Scott McCall again, he'd known that from the start. So what was left? What else was he besides himself? An alpha? A friend, brother, lover? What defined him now that could overcome his guilt?

"It's not easy." Scott whipped around and nearly stumbled in his weakened state. Derek looked unimpressed from where he sat lounging in a tree. Scott glared up from under wet bangs.

"I see my stealth skills have drastically decreased."

"Not really," Derek hopped down and landed gracefully on the pebbled ground. "I just happened to be watching your window when you left."

"Creepy, dude."

"Your observational skills are what's decreased for not spotting me immediately."

"Sorry, I've got a lot on my mind." Scott huffed as Derek came and sat next to him, both now soaked from the rain.

"Yeah, I know. I've known for a long time, I was just hoping you'd come and talk to me before you did something stupid."

"And when has that ever happened?"

"Good point," Derek sighed. "I should have talked to you long ago."

"About _what?_ "

Derek's voice turned dark. "Scott, I understand guilt better than anyone else in the pack." Scott frowned, not sure where he was going and Derek gave a bitter laugh. "You forgot, that's fine. I wish I could," he looked up to the sky, "Scott, I'm responsible for my family's murder, remember?"

"I—" The world grew dull around Scott as he took in what Derek said.

"I told Kate about them, I was the only reason they all burned to death. I was the reason my sisters and I were orphans. I turned Peter into what he was. In a way I'm responsible for turning you into a wolf. I'm responsible and I've had to live with that guilt ever since I walked up to my house and found the smoking corpses of my entire family."

"Oh god Derek, I'm sor—"

"It's not easy to live with that kind of guilt," Derek continued, but he threw his arm around Scott's shoulders. "The guilt was crushing. I thought Laura would hate me and I'd be alone, I was so terrified of her rejection. She didn't, our mother had taught her well and she made a great alpha. She lied and said it wasn't my fault, thanks to her strength I was able to carry on—or I guess I carried on for her. Didn't make my guilt disappear, though. It's crushing, all-consuming. It never leaves you, always in the back of your mind."

"What happened then?" Scott asked with baited breath.

Derek quirked an eyebrow at Scott. "I became a different person, I became that guy you first met in the forest."

"Yeah, you were still a creeper then." Derek chuckled and Scott gave a small grin.

"I became a man who obsessed over whatever he could. Revenge, getting a pack, anything that would push the guilt away. All it did was add more guilt to the pile. Caused my two remaining sisters' deaths. My own obsession finally caused my greatest fear; I was completely alone.

Then this stupid kid, another one of my obsessions, walked up and said _'be a part of my family_ ', like it was the easiest thing in the world. And he called me brother and just like that I had someone in my life again." He paused and Scott stopped himself from saying anything and ruining the moment. "I realized my guilt was...pointless. Guilt doesn't help the dead or the living, just reminds us of painful memories."

Scott took a deep breath, inhaled any scent he could pick out through the rain, and released it. He tried to release more, tried to let go of his guilt, but it clung to him, refusing to come loose.

"So what's the trick?" he asked.

"Trick?" Derek shook his head. "Don't know if I'd call it a trick. My mother always said purpose is the strongest motivator. I guess I found a new purpose with you, one where my old guilt didn't matter—more than that it was useless and I had to let it go."

"Yeah well your mom was a badass alpha who...well, I'm not sure what she did—"

"She was the Guardian of Beacon Hills, Scott."

"I'm pretty much the furthest thing from that." Scott threw a pebble into the river and watched as it sank.

"I don't think that's true," Derek said. "You always fight to protect the pack."

"That's an alpha's job and it's the only part of that job I can do correctly." Scott clarified. "Purpose...a new purpose. Don't know if I even had an old one."

"Like I said, it isn't easy." Derek bumped his shoulder against Scott's. "But I understand, you're not alone."

"I—right." Scott went rigid at his words. _You are not alone_. "Thanks, man."

_"Keep trying, sweetie. I'm so proud of you."_

_"I'll never give up, Mom."_

Scott felt his chest constrict and quickly clutched it as it as memories swarmed his mind. His mother always told him to keep trying, keep fighting. Fight, not just for himself, but for Deucalion's sake too. He had to see past his own pain, so many other people looked past theirs to focus on him, he could at least do the same.

_Different isn't bad._

Kali always said that to him, Scott would have never guessed until recently she was actually trying to cheer him up, to give him a message of hope. She also said he was always making things more dramatic than they were. So many people lived with guilt in their lives, everyone made mistakes, but they didn't let it control them. Most people didn't wallow in guilt their entire lives, not sure how to atone so they never tried.

Maybe...Scott McCall still _did_ exist. The boy who took every loss personally, who let the guilt of thinking he saw Derek die eat at him until it almost killed him, who ran around trying to save everyone without a thought of what his actions put others through. The boy inside who would have him wallow in misery over all he had done and only wonder if he could better himself.

It was time to let that boy go. Time to become more.

"Derek, let's go back before the others worry."

"It's your choice." Derek said. The same thing he always said, his mantra from the very beginning. _It's your choice_.

Something sparked in Scott's mind just then. A vision of something...with purpose.

"Yeah, I guess it's always been my choice." Scott said as he stood up. It was at that exact point that several panicked howls sounded off in the distance, both the twins and Deucalion's—which sounded borderline hysterical—and Scott wasn't surprised to not hear Kali's.

"I swear that bitch doesn't worry about anything," Derek griped as he responded with a call that Scott was with him.

"You know, now they're gonna be upset with _you_." Scott pointed out. "Especially Deucalion."

"Yeah they'll think I smuggled you away to have you all to myself," Derek smirked at the idea. "I can live with that." Something popped up in Scott's mind suddenly and he frowned.

"Speaking of, what was Ethan going on about something with you trying to _'claim'_ me?" Scott crossed his arms as Derek went bright red.

"Jesus Christ that's not—ugh, it's just because that fucking old wolf _thinks_ he's courting you and has claimed you in that sense, but that's bullshit. You probably didn't even realize what he was doing." He looked and saw Scott's blank face. "Knew it; it's his own damn fault trying to initiate a courtship as a submissive. He wasn't prepared for what it did to his mental state when we thought you were dead."

"I am so fucking lost here."

"Typical." Derek rolled his eyes. "Talk to him about it if you want, but I was _not_ trying to claim you. I think of you as a brother. Honestly though, I would make a better mate," Derek glanced up then, and gave a small grin. "I'm just saying."

" _Mate?_ "

"Let's just go back to the house, I'm in for it as it is." Derek groaned and pulled Scott along with him. Scott turned and looked back at the river. The vision he had had, for just a fraction of a second, stayed with him.

 

* * *

 

The sandwich Ethan got Scott was honestly one of the best he had ever eaten. It might have had something to do with not eating solid food for over a week, but Scott was past caring as he tore into the Combo Meat Sub with a frightening ferocity while Derek and Deucalion screamed behind.

"This is so good, Ethan." Scott said around a mouthful. "What's even in it?" Ethan opened his mouth. "—scratch that, I don't care. This is the best thing I've ever had."

Deucalion yelled something about Derek trying to mark Scott as his and that prompted Derek to take a swing at the older man and they both turned their argument physical without missing a beat. Kali sat next Scott, eating the pickles he had taken out and tossed aside.

"If I'd known you had this much of a hard-on for sandwiches I would have made the boys get you one earlier," she commented as a chair was throw across the room.

"Well, we weren't getting the deposit back anyways." Adian sighed miserably.

"You missed the one they had a few days ago." Kali continued, eyes flicking up to the fighting alphas. "It was pretty hot. They both tore off the other's shirt and I would have bet money they were going to switch into a Fight of Dominance they were so enraged."

"How's that different from what they're doing now?" Scott asked as he was about to take another bite.

"Wolf-Dom fights are uh..." Adian trailed off.

"You have really angry sex." Ethan snickered at his brother's reluctance to say it. Scott arched an eyebrow.

"It's built into werewolves within their pack," Kali's grin was predatory. "To keep pack members from killing each other during arguments, when they get so worked up they're blinded by rage their body kind of initiates a quick heat. Instead of tearing each other's throats out, the two wolves fight for the dominate sex position and the loser—instead of dying—just gets fucked and is forced to enjoy it because of the heat running through them. It's humiliating and the winner has bragging rights, but no one dies."

"I...did not know that. _How_ did I not know that?" Scott processed that as he chewed. The more you know.

"The environment you kept the pack in before really didn't leave room for arguments. Which was a shame, those two fighting is really hot, they got so close." Kali sighed longingly. "I was pretty wet in anticipation."

"Ugh, Kali!" Ethan covered his ears and closed his eyes. "No one wants to hear that." There was a loud crack as Deucalion and Derek slammed against the couch and broke it.

"What stopped the epic sex fight?" Scott asked, chugging the glass of water next to him and grabbed the second sandwich Ethan had bought him.

"Oh." Kali deflated. "That old wolf and his pride. He must have realized he was going into a rage heat and bit himself to snap out of it. So lame."

A lamp went flying past Scott and Ethan's heads to smash against the wall, causing Ethan to yelp in alarm and both twins to duck under the table. Scott continued eating, far too absorbed with his food. Literally this was the best sandwich in the world.

"I guess you can handle a lot of meat." Kali shot and Scott laughed, covering his mouth as food went flying. The fighting paused at the sound. Scott swallowed his food and turned around with Kali.

"You done yet?" he asked. Both Derek and Deucalion were covered in cuts and bruises. One of Derek's eyes were swollen shut and Deucalion's shirt had been ripped off, a long gash traveling down his chest. The men panted, out of breath, and Derek suddenly dropped his fighting posture.

"Yeah, I'm done," he spat. He and Deucalion's eyes met and the dark-haired man gave a sharp glare. "Face it, he doesn't belong to either of us, but you're the one who tried to claim him without his knowledge." Derek spun around and stalked out of the house, grabbing his jacket as he left. Scott watched everything as he finished his sandwich. He was never not eating food again.

"Deucalion?" Adian asked from under the table. The older man jerked from the floor and stood up, not meeting Scott's eyes and made a hasty retreat to their bedroom. The younger man didn't miss how red the back of his neck was.

"He knows you two share the same room, right?" Kali asked, face conflicted as she pretended not to care but loved the drama too much.

"Yeah, but now it'd look stupid if he left so he's going to stay up there panicking silently." Scott sighed. "So dramatic."

"You're not angry with him, are you?" Aidan asked as both twins got up and sat back down. Scott might have beat around the bush before trying to get more of an answer from the older boy, but he didn't feel up to it today.

"About the courtship thing? Nah." At the twins unbelieving look Scott shrugged. "I'm weird when it comes to wolf things, remember? I only just found out about _'rage heats'_ , I feel like there needs to be a handbook that comes when you get the bite."

Kali chuckled and tossed her hair back. "I'm really loving this version of you, Alpha. Maybe almost bleed out more often, seems to do wonders for your personality."

"Please don't," Adian begged. "I'm not sure the rest of the pack could handle it."

"Didn't you get your arms mauled?" Scott cast an eye over Kali's upper body but there wasn't a mark on her. His own bandaged arm twinged, reminding him of a lingering question in his mind.

"Yeah," Kali huffed and inspected her skin, "that was my bad, haven't seen a wolf go feral in so long—didn't realize he was that far gone."

"You go feral every battle." Scott pointed out.

"I'm still in control," she countered. "His wasn't due to bloodlust but..." Kali paused and Scott noticed both the twins giving her very pointed looks. She gave a long, frustrated sigh. "It was due to shit you two still need to talk about. Honestly, this is so stupid."

"Just go talk to him, Alpha—" Ethan started.

"Fuck it—he's so madly in love with you it's turned him into an idiot who doesn't know what he wants or how to ask for it." Kali said and stood up abruptly. "I've known it for months. This latest stint of you almost dying just made it too real for him and he reacted poorly—also due in part to an unformed courtship he thought he could do by himself."

Both twins were speechless and all eyes turned to Scott.

"I am never going to get the hang of all this wolf bullshit," he sighed and hung his head.

"What the hell is wrong with you, Kali!" Aiden growled. "That's personal! Only between Deucalion and—"

"Not if he was never going to say anything to Scott!" She countered. The two continued to bicker and Scott felt a headache approaching. He wanted another sandwich.

A foot nudged his own under the table and Scott glanced up to Ethan.

"Just go talk to him," he whispered. Scott grinned, surprising the other boy.

"Can do," he said and pushed away from the table. "Don't stop squabbling on my account." Kali and Adian paid him no mind and continued with their argument, voices heated in a way that Scott wouldn't be surprised if angry sex came out of it.

He climbed up the stairs and pushed the door open to his room. The hardwood floor had been stained a dark red so his blood would be less noticeable and, for the most part, it worked. Deucalion sat on the bed, shoulders tense as he stared out the window. The wounds covering his chest were mostly healed, just a few scratches left. Scott took a deep breath, the scent of wood, rain, and Deucalion settled something in his chest and he closed the door behind him.

Deucalion's heartbeat slowed to a monotone and Scott suppressed a grin as the man in front of him tried to appear calm. His scent spoke of anxiety, humiliation, shame. Derek's words had cut deep.

Scott made his way past Deucalion and over to the window, leaning against the frame. The rain was never ending, spattering against the glass and making the world gray. A scene swirled in Scott's mind and he closed his eyes, leaning his forehead against the glass. _A purpose_...

"Scott?" Deucalion's voice was hesitant. Scott turned his head. "You seem— _different_."

"Derek and I had a good talk." Scott looked down at his arm, wincing as blood seeped through the bandages again. "I was trying to understand my guilt, how to get past it so I could move on."

"Did you?"

Scott looked back out the window, saw his own dim reflection stare back at him. He looked determined, calm, collected. He looked like leader. _Different_.

His mind was made up.

"We're going back to Beacon Hills." Silence met his words. Scott was patient and waited, waited until the silence stretched for too long and he turned fully to face Deucalion. The older man sat hunched, hair in front of his eyes and Scott couldn't read him in that moment. He stepped closer. "You alright?"

"No."

Scott reached out to touch Deucalion's shoulder but he stopped him abruptly, grabbing Scott's injured arm and cradling it in his hands.

"It's not healing."

"Apparently, I must not want it to," Scott shrugged. Deucalion flinched and let the limb go.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to—"

"You meant to rip Derek's throat out." Scott chided and flexed his hand; it stung. Deucalion had stilled next to him.

"I wasn't thinking."

"Something about going feral?" Deucalion made a face at his words, disgust and self-loathing.

"It's—"

"That why you bit my neck too?" Funny enough it had healed already, but it irked Scott. A primal part of him was still displeased. That got a strong reaction from Deucalion and his head snapped up.

" _No_. I just—I wanted to get you to react, it had always worked before. I didn't mean to mark you, I swear. That was—" he let out a small hysterical laugh "—I couldn't stop myself. Didn't know what I was doing until it was too late. It was a gross assault on you in a weakened state...I don't think sorry is enough, for any of my behavior that day."

Scott wasn't sure what the right thing to say in that moment was, so he sat next to Deucalion instead. His fingers brushed against Deucalion's arm, feeling as the hair on it rise at Scott's touch. A smile pulled at his lips.

"Nah, sorry 's enough for me." He looked over to Deucalion and tried to meet his eyes. The older man bit back a noise, either a laugh or a sob, but his eyes were clear when they finally met Scott's. "Just try to keep those teeth in check, they're sharp."

" _I'm sorry_ ," Deucalion breathed out, gently taking Scott's injured arm again. "I would throw my demon power away in a second if I could just heal you, like a normal wolf. But I'll never be able to take away your pain." Scott's hand found one of Deucalion's and he threaded their fingers together, realizing why his arm had refused to heal.

"Sometimes a simple touch can help." He had learned that touch was a powerful thing within the werewolf community, able to communicate more than words ever could. "No magical powers needed; you're enough." He unwrapped the gauze and was relieved to see the wound finally close up. "See—"

Scott was knocked back with surprising force and gave a muffled cry and his lips were assaulted. Deucalion was draped over him, claiming his mouth with wet, hard kisses. Scott responded back after a moment, slowing down Deucalion's frantic movements and pushing back eventually. Deucalion pulled away, out of breath, and dropped himself onto Scott's chest.

"What was that for?" Scott laughed.

"You know what." Deucalion muttered against his skin and sat back up after another moment, skin flushed. "What your words do to me..."

"I have an idea after all these years." Scott replied. He glanced at his arm and was amused to see tiny white scars. "Looks like you marked me anyways." Deucalion's heartbeat skyrocketed and Scott chuckled. "It's fine, I should really be apologizing to you, I know my blood probably doesn't taste very good after everything I've been through—not like yours. You taste—"

"Like tears."

"Hmm?" Scott tilted his head, Deucalion face had become closed off. "No, you taste like spice and electricity. It's a little heady to be honest."

"Your blood tastes like tears, Scott."

"I—oh." Scott paused. He hadn't expected that. "S-sorry."

"Don't be, it jolted me out of my crazed state. I was horrified, that's why I spit it out." Deucalion brought a hand to his face and wiped at his mouth, as if he could still taste it. "Tears; they reminded me of too much. Of my own pain, crying alone at night after I had first been turned, of your tears as you tried to express your anguish when the darkness had you. All that in the instant I realized I had bit you. It overloaded my animal instincts. I..." he trailed off and stayed silent.

Scott let the silence overtake them for awhile, content to let Deucalion sort through his feelings when a thought suddenly came to him.

"The heat intensified everything, didn't it?" Scott noticed Deucalion's pulse quicken and his eyes darken.

The older man took a shaky breath, "Yes, painfully so."

"I thought 'going feral' didn't cover everything," Scott sighed. "Everybody's actions make a lot more sense now...as well as my own. I guess I underestimated how much a heat weakens and throws off a pack."

"Don't..." Deucalion started but his voice died and he appeared traumatized, fingers trembling suddenly.

"What?"

"Please, don't force me to leave ever again."

Scott's mouth went dry and he nodded quickly, tears forming in his eyes at the memory. His grip on Deucalion tightened—he wanted _more_ —and leaned in until his forehead was resting against the other man's neck. His scent was intoxicating, spice and clean sweat mixed with something uniquely Deucalion. The man underneath Scott shuddered at the attention as soft breathing ghosted across his neck.

"I promise." Scott whispered and meant every word.

" _Thank you_." If Deucalion's voice shook, Scott ignored it. Instead he scraped his teeth gently along the older man's neck, causing a low whine to slip from him.

"So about this whole 'claiming me' thing?" Scott switched subjects neatly and was pleased to feel Deucalion freeze underneath him. "Courting?" Deucalion's heartbeat sped up out as he silently panicked and Scott lifted himself away from the other man. "You know me, I'm literally clueless when it comes to werewolf traditions so I've had a lot of people throwing words at me I don't really understand without context. Something about an unformed courtship?"

"Shit." Deucalion was less eloquent than he usually was.

"What is it, exactly?" Scott pressed harder. "From others' reactions I'm under the impression that a submissive usually doesn't trigger this—whatever this is supposed to be. Am I right?" Deucalion nodded jerkily, eyes adverted and looking somewhat like a kicked puppy. "I—" Scott pulled back on his tone, realizing how he sounded. "I'm not actually that upset, just confused—oh my god!" Realization dawned on him. "Was that the date!? _That's what the date really was wasn't it?_ " He didn't know why he sounded so excited, but he was glad to have finally fit that piece into the puzzle.

Deucalion's entire neck and face were a bright red and he had buried his face in his hands. Scott settled back and crossed his arms. "I was wondering why you were so forward suddenly. Is it generally supposed to be the other way around? How do courtships even work? I wonder—"

"Scott." The young man snapped his mouth shut, desisting in his rambling. Deucalion had moved his hands away but his eyes were now tired, heavy lines around them and Scott grew worried. "Courtships are a very serious thing and intensely private. I...went about it the wrong way. A submissive can make their desires known but it's ultimately the dominate wolf's decision to make and initiate. I was just," he waved a hand around, "happy?" He said the word like it was foreign to him, like it was an actual question. "There's still some aspect to being a submissive I'm not used to, even after all these years. I just _wanted_ so badly that I acted out of my place. It's unhealthy, what I did. Half-formed courtships can be dangerous after a time because there is no true reciprocation. I wasn't thinking straight at the time."

"I mean, it was during a heat." Scott shrugged, Deucalion still not having answered his question. "You normally don't have a lot of control."

"And normally an Alpha would have known what I was doing and shut it down, but that only makes it worse." Deucalion rubbed the back of his neck, like he was trying to erase the blush still there. "It's alright, there's an easy fix."

"I figured." Scott nodded. They just needed to do everything properly—

"Sever the link."

"I—what?" Scott's jaw tightened as his eyes widened.

"Don't worry, I'm still yours." Deucalion hastened to assure him. "I'm not asking—I'd never want—"

"What _is_ a courtship?" Scott asked again, putting steel behind his voice. He wanted all the answers before he did anything. "Answer that first."

"It's..." Deucalion really seemed stubborn on not wanting to spell it out. Unfortunately that's what Scott needed.

"I'm going to assume it's something a little more intense than just dating?" he tried.

Deucalion snorted. "Such a human word; empty and void of true emotion."

"Help me out here then." Scott's patience was wearing thin.

"It's..." Deucalion tried again and pinched the bridge of his nose. Scott recognized the action as the older man trying to figure out the right words rather than an unwillingness to talk. "I'm trying to translate it to something that holds equal meaning to you. It's—fiancé?" he finally settled on and gave a glance in Scott's direction. Scott picked out the fear deep within but his mind was currently too blank to really process it.

"You...uh." Scott tried, he really did. His mind whizzed, trying to connect different dots and finally complete a puzzle that had been in the back of his mind for several months now. "Explain more? Because to me, fiancé equals eventual marriage."

Deucalion gave a deep, strained sigh. "Courtship can occur between any wolves, they don't have to be currently in a bond like we are or even the same pack. Courtship...happens when both wolves want to become..." He let out a frustrated laugh. "Mates, Scott. I wanted to be your mate, that's all."

That's all, like it was the most casual thing in the world. Scott might have believed it if it weren't for the fear in Deucalion's eyes, the redness of his neck and face, the tremble in his fingers.

"Courtship is like asking someone to be your fiancé because it ends in a permanent relationship?" Scott asked, still not sure how to feel.

"It's something so much deeper than that." Deucalion looked a little desperate, something wild in his eyes. "The fact you don't understand makes it even worse, what I did. It's fine, just sever it. The connection will break and my mentality will normalize again."

"Will it hurt?"

"It's fine, that's not important."

" _Will it hurt?_ "

"Yes." Deucalion's face twisted in anger, as if upset Scott was worried about how it would affect him. "It will hurt, but the pain will be temporary. Rejection hurts everyone, supernatural or not, but it's fine."

"What do I say?"

"Just say that you reject the offer of courtship, it's quite simple."

"I—" Scott paused. The puzzle finally complete and he saw the picture, the ending Deucalion had been trying for. He looked over at the older man, body tense as he braced himself for Scott's words. "So...you don't want it anymore?" It was the only conclusion he could come to, why Deucalion had asked him to say the words.

"What?" Deucalion hadn't expected that. He blinked at Scott.

"The courtship? You don't want it anymore?" Scott looked away. "That's why you want it severed?"

"Don't you?" His voice was fragile in that instant and Scott could hear hope through the layers of denial. "I've made so many mistakes up to this point, it was a gross betrayal to attack you to try and force a courtship—"

"If I can't wallow in guilt then neither can you, asshole." Scott quipped and Deucalion flinched. "Answer my question."

"I don't want it to affect your decision."

Scott rolled his eyes. "Of course it will, I care about what you think."

"Dammit Scott..."

"Please, _answer_."

"No." Deucalion's voice cracked, sounding raw and he tried to take a steadying breath. "I don't want it severed, I want—what I wanted..."

"You want to be mates, one day." Scott was still a little fuzzy on that, but it sounded suspiciously like werewolf marriage. But if courtship went deeper than a proposal, then this was surely something deeper than marriage, more profound and clearly something important to Deucalion.

"I wanted a dream, not reality." Deucalion muttered. "But I'd rather have a severed link than an unfinished one."

"I understand." Scott lowered his eyes. Why was Deucalion always so stubborn? Pride, he was prideful, it was his defining trait. It was aggravating and frustrating but Scott supposed he was too. Deucalion's sin was pride and Scott loved him for it. Scott's sin used to be wrath but maybe...now it was something else.

If Scott had to give it a name, he'd have to say greed.

"Proposal accepted."

"See, that wasn't too— _what?_ " Deucalion's heartbeat and pulse skyrocketed, his pupils dilated as his eyes met Scott's and he broke out into a sweat that had the scent of panic and desire.

"Proposal accepted," Scott repeated and shrugged. "Courtship formed...or, uh, successful? I reciprocate? I'm not sure what the right thing to say is. Is there a certain phrase?"

"No—I," Deucalion seemed stuck. His scent shifted suddenly; added to the spice was now the smell of fresh cut grass and pine trees. Scott leaned in again and sniffed, curious at the abrupt change.

"Your scent—"

" _It's yours_." Deucalion exhaled quickly, still shell-shocked. "That's your scent mixing with mine, it happens when—" He choked off and quickly doubled over.

"Deucalion?" Scott reached out and ran a hand along Deucalion's back, hair standing on the back of his arm as a tingle ran through his body at the touch, like gentle electricity. Deucalion shuddered in response.

"Like sparks of magic," he groaned and Scott saw unshed tears in his eyes. "You feel like small sparks of magic cascading across my skin."

"Is that...good?" Scott asked hesitantly, lifting his hand up.

"Just means we're connected, like our scents. Wh-what do I—?"

"Electricity, you feel like when I build up a static charge and touch metal."

"Does it hurt?" Now Deucalion looked worried.

"No," Scott shook his head, "feels good. Is that—is this what a courtship does?"

"A complete one, yes." Deucalion was shaking all over. "You said yes?" The fragility was there again, along with the hope.

Scott felt his cheeks burning as he looked away. "Of course. Isn't it obvious I love you?" And he said it, _really_ said it. The words tumbled from his lips like they were soft and new and Scott swallowed down his nerves.

"Yes, it's actually very clear...I'm just...a bit slow," said possibly one of the most brilliant tacticians Scott had ever known. He rolled his eyes and turned back to Deucalion to retort, but was stopped as hands grabbed his face and lips crashed against his.

"Mmmph!" Scott gave an indignant muffled cry as he was thrown back onto the bed again. Deucalion's motions were erratic and hasty as he climbed on top of Scott, desperately trying to rip his own clothes off. "Hey—" Another frenzied kiss cut Scott off and he could taste the electricity tingle in his mouth. Both men moaned and Deucalion tangled his fingers in Scott's hair and pulled them closer, until they were flush against each other.

"... _mine_." Deucalion muttered against Scott's lips and the younger man froze. It wasn't indignation or annoyance at being claimed that slapped him in the face, but a feeling of utter belonging took over Scott at those words. Was this what Deucalion felt each time Scott said that to him?

Deucalion's mouth attacked Scott's again, ripping off his already torn shirt and the action turned Scott on even further. He slid his hands up Deucalion's back, scraping his nails down the flesh and arching as the feeling of electricity raced up his spine. Deucalion gasped at the action, mouth missing Scott's and sliding along his jaw, his teeth just grazing against the younger man's neck. Like a white hot jolt of desire Scott moaned loudly, uncaring if the rest of his pack heard and fisted Deucalion's hair, forcing his mouth to stay where it was.

"Keep—keep doing that," he ordered. Deucalion growled and lavished Scott's neck, lips and tongue, abusing flesh. The sensations connected straight to Scott's groin, or that's what it felt like to him. Never before had Scott really experienced someone touching his neck in such a way, as an alpha it had only felt wrong but he'd been told how sensitive it was. He had even felt it briefly before when Deucalion had sucked on it, but this was a whole new level.

Another scrape of teeth against Scott's collarbone and the younger man nearly came, crying out and burying his face in Deucalion's shoulder. Every touch felt new, the entire world and its sensations were like the first time again and it was close to overloading Scott's brain. He pulled Deucalion's head up to crush their mouths together and his beta whimpered.

"I need—" Deucalion shuddered against Scott, his breathing unsteady and labored. At some point he had started ripping off his jeans and was attempting to mount Scott. "I need you inside me _now_. God—I need..." he nearly slipped and Scott caught the older man against his chest. His skin burned Scott's and the trembling became apparent. "I need you to claim me now—I need to feel you as my partner—I have to _feel_ this courtship as deeply as I can...I've waited—wanted—so _long_."

Scott jumped as he felt hands start to fumble with the zipper on his jeans. The scent of Deucalion, now more than ever, was intoxicating. The feel of his skin as his beta squirmed on his lap _begging_ for him sent a powerful thrill racing through Scott, but the look in Deucalion's eyes and the stress in his voice called to something deeper.

It was as if Deucalion was still scared something would change; he was racing against an unseen clock. Like Scott might take his words back.

He was still alpha, still in charge.

Scott sucked in a deep breath, the teenage fantasy part of his brain reveled in Deucalion being on top and worshiping his body. There wasn't anything wrong with that fantasy, but that wasn't the foundation of their relationship. And it wasn't what Deucalion needed in this moment.

The growl built deep in Scott's chest and his body came to life in an instant, hands whipping out to grab Deucalion's and throw him back against the foot of the bed, Scott's body pinning the older man there as he bit into the neck that belonged to _him_.

"Calm down," Scott said as he eased his bite. Deucalion panted underneath him, chest heaving as Scott still had his hands pinned to the side. His skin glistened with sweat, tinted with arousal and his nipples were hardened into dark nubs. Scott felt his mouth start to water and licked his lips. Deucalion moaned at the action and thrust his hips up.

"You know you want to fuck me, Scott." Deucalion's voice wavered as he spoke, as if just the thought of Scott pounding him deep into the mattress was almost too much. "Just don't hold back when you do."

Scott's gaze traveled down to focus on Deucalion's cock, laying thick on his hip and red with neglect. The tip quivered as a bead of precome started to leak out. At Scott's attention it swelled further and Deucalion made an odd whine in the back of his throat. He spread his legs further for Scott as an invitation, testicles drawn up tight against his body.

" _Take it_ ," Deucalion urged, voice desperate again. "Take what's yours."

"I will," Scott promised and dragged Deucalion up, flipping him over so he was lying across Scott's legs, well-muscled ass resting perfectly up across his lap. "But first I need you to calm down."

"I—"

Scott slapped Deucalion, hard. Right across the rounded flesh in front of him and watched as a red flush appeared. Deucalion yelped initially, almost jerking off Scott, but the young man grabbed both his hands and held them against his back to steady them both. After realizing his position, Scott both felt and heard his partner's pleased moan. He smoothed a hand over Deucalion's ass, fingers slipping down to just brush against his entrance and the man underneath him gasped.

"I'm going to take you, stop worrying about that." Scott chided and slapped again, much softer this time, and Deucalion shuddered in his grasp. "I'm going to fuck you so hard it'll hurt to even try and sit, every time you move you'll be reminded of who you belong to. My scent and marks will be covering you so everyone can see and _know_. I'll fuck you so well you'll never doubt this is real ever again."

Deucalion was biting his lip so hard it was bleeding, eyes squeezed shut as he processed Scott's words. He was still shaking, and Scott understood that he wasn't used to getting what he truly desired. Wasn't used to being happy.

"I just need to you calm down," Scott lowered his voice, his tone soft and warm. "You're trying to rush, I can tell."

"Just—" Deucalion suddenly collapsed, released a long breath and buried his face in the mattress, unable to continue. "I've lost you too many times in so many different ways...I can't, I need—" He broke off again. "There's more, you don't know what this means to me, to have this. I can't—"

Scott slapped him again as he felt Deucalion get close to breaking. His hand twinged with the force of his hit and Deucalion cried out, erection throbbing against Scott's thighs. He felt as some of the tension eased out of the older man.

"You're mine," Deucalion sobbed into the sheets, sounding relieved. "You said yes."

Scott's hand came down again and Deucalion's hips stuttered, grinding into Scott's knees and his scent drenched in carnal lust. Scott lowered his head and gave a long, filthy lick around Deucalion's hole, grinning as the man choked and wailed. His lovely low voice cracking in pleasure as he screamed Scott's name over and over. The younger man lapped at his entrance, tongue delving in and out of Deucalion at a languid pace until his spit coated everything. Scott pulled back up and admired his handiwork; Deucalion had finally stopped trembling, instead too overcome with the sensations Scott was teasing him with.

"I'm yours," Scott whispered, " _forever_." He sunk his fingers into Deucalion and twisted, feeling along until a found the bundle of nerves and pressed against his prostate. Deucalion thrashed violently, fangs snapping out as he howled. Scott quickly pulled out and slapped his beta into submission, bringing him down from the brink of orgasm with the sting of pain, but leaving him just on the edge.

Scott took a deep breath, anxious for what he was about to say. "I've wanted your love and approval for longer than I'd care to admit, and after claiming you a small part of me was upset we could never be equals again, but now...sounds like we are again. And maybe one day mates? This guilt, I can finally put it behind me so when I look at you I only feel love. I'm sorry that I focused for so long on things I can't change instead of seeing what was right in front of me."

Deucalion chuckled wetly underneath him. "We're both guilty of that sin, Scott."

Scott smoothed his hand along Deucalion's ass, a deep primal instinct content with how perfect it felt seeing his hand marks there. He struck again, firmly, seeing the flesh bounce and Deucalion thrust against his leg.

"I want to bite your ass," slipped out and Deucalion moaned. "I want to mark you everywhere."

"Do it, _please_."

Instead, Scott pressed three fingers into Deucalion and curled them making the older man buck and twist. He pulled out and dipped a single finger in this time, barely past his knuckle and shallowly fucked Deucalion. Scott kept it up for several minutes, even as Deucalion begged for more.

"I'm going to take my time with you," he admonished and swatted the man far too lightly. He returned his finger to Deucalion's opening but this time only swirled his finger gently around the rim. The older man finally screamed in frustration, hips canting upwards trying to get Scott to do more.

"I can only take some much toying Scott, please fuck me—"

Scott cut off the remark with a hard smack, then a more powerful one. It shut Deucalion up as he groaned into the sheets. Scott felt his own erection straining against his jeans, a damp spot having formed long ago as Deucalion writhed in his lap. A thought suddenly came to him.

"Does that mean you're no longer my submissive?"

Deucalion panted, sweat pouring off him. "Only if you don't want that any longer. You can release me."

Scott scratched his nails down the man's back. "Do you want to be released?"

Another slap and Deucalion shuddered violently, hips thrusting against Scott's thighs. He twisted his head until one of his piercing blue eyes met Scott's. "Don't you dare," he snarled and Scott almost smiled. Instead he gave another slap that had Deucalion choking back a moan. He gasped, forehead pressed against the sheets again. "I _need_ this. Need to be leashed, controlled. Feel safe, like this, with you."

"Safe?" Scott cupped his hand over the reddened flash of Deucalion's ass. Slipped a finger to push into his entrance, pressed firmly against his prostate and watched the man flail. He withdrew the finger just as quickly and gave another quick slap, too light for Deucalion's tastes based on the whine he received.

"From hurting others." Deucalion finally sobbed. "I feel sane with you. Normal. I trust myself again when you take control."

"That's..." Scott couldn't say how he felt and slapped again, hard, almost too hard but Deucalion gasped in relief, hips grinding against Scott in jerking motions. Scott kept slapping until his hand was numb, harder and harder until Deucalion was screaming and crying in pleasure, precome soaking Scott's jeans as he rubbed himself against the younger man. "I trust myself with you too, you force me to look at myself—my choices. Own up to them, overcome them. I feel complete with you next to me."

Scott somehow felt it as Deucalion finally came, deep in his soul as if they were part of the same body. He didn't come too, but it was a close thing as Deucalion screamed and came apart, tears running down his face at Scott's words. The younger man clung on tight to him, releasing his arms to instead wrap himself around Deucalion as the man trembled from his release.

"Sorry..." Deucalion eventually mumbled.

Scott chuckled, "For?"

"Didn't mean to end things quickly—shit." Deucalion pushed himself up, arms shaking and he nearly collapsed again. His hair was damp with sweat as it fell in front of his eyes and Scott watched as Deucalion tried to regain his breath.

"It's fine," he shrugged, "I pushed you pretty hard." Deucalion reached out and stroked a hand down Scott's neck and the younger man smiled.

"You're still..." Deucalion motioned to Scott's straining erection trapped in his jeans that were unzipped and riding low on his hips. "You were going to fuck me." It sounded a little petulant, and when Scott ducked down to meet Deucalion's eyes he recognized the look of subtle disappointment. Deucalion was always harshest on himself.

"I never said we were done," Scott quipped. The air froze with tension and lust. Deucalion's scent immediately switched from exhaustion to desire and Scott grinned widely. "I promised you a lot, remember? We're not done by a long shot." The look and smile Deucalion gave him at those words made nearly everything Scott had been through worth it, to get to this point.

Here, with the man he loved.

Although still recovering, Deucalion managed to throw himself at Scott in renewed passion and the rest of the day and night were spent with Scott fulfilling his promise to his mate. Pounding against Deucalion with new senses flooding both their systems until he broke the bed, and continuing against the wall and then the shower until not an inch of Deucalion was left that hadn't been claimed by Scott.

When they both collapsed and darkness crept into Scott's vision he finally felt no fear or guilt at the coming dreams. Only happiness as Deucalion pulled him close and curled his body around him whispering, _"Mine."_ over and over until his deep voice lulled Scott to sleep.

 

* * *

 

"I think my new wolf form is a reflection of you."

The storm had finally stopped and Scott could see sunlight through the curtains as he sat up in bed. It was sometime early in the morning and everything felt warm and content. Deucalion shifted next to him, groaning at his sore and stiff body but Scott caught the grin on his lips. Blue eyes rose up to meet his own dark brown ones.

"A reflection of me? How?"

Scott gave a soft laugh. "Anubis, remember?" He pointed to some of the books laying out on their desk. "That story you told in Egypt, the wolf I saw in the Between Realm, 'to measure a person's heart after death' a judge of souls so to speak, a protector too of those who were crossing to the afterlife. A True Alpha is an alpha by character alone, their heart judged and found righteous, and...a protector, sound familiar?"

"Sounds like you."

"I think somehow my form changed to fit my new reflection, and I thought of everything you told me. Your beliefs influenced me."

"I—" Deucalion sat up as well, face conflicted in a frown. "I think I'm flattered."

"You should be," Scott rolled out of bed and felt as the rest of his pack started to wake up. "I need to talk to entire pack today."

"About what you said yesterday?" Deucalion asked. "Beacon Hills?"

"Yeah," Scott turned to face him. "Yesterday when I was with Derek he told me about his mother; she was the Guardian of Beacon Hills. Under her there was peace among wolves. For just a second I had...I dunno, a vision? I saw myself as a Guardian, and maybe I could go one step further. I could make peace with the Hunters too, I could—" Scott stopped abruptly. Deucalion was staring at him in a way he never had before. The intensity of it made Scott stammer. "Wh-what? I-I know it's stupid—"

"It's not." Deucalion voice was soft, but broken and he looked away. "But that's a dangerous road to go down. Being a visionary has a price, Scott. Just...trust me on this. You will be hurt, maybe even destroyed."

Scott studied the man in front of him. The broken visionary who had fought for peace until it ruined and twisted him into a monster. But Scott understood the darkness now, and what lay at it's heart: fear. He stepped forward and felt his back straighten, determination flooding his body.

"There was a time I'd have said _'I don't believe that'_ , but now I know that's not true. The world is a cruel and monstrous place that crushes the weak, but...it's beautiful too. There are things you can find to love and protect. I chose to live a different way, to take a different path. One that will leave me with more scars. I opened the beacon at Beacon Hills and left it to its own darkness; even if everyone hates me, I need to go back and protect it. I will become the new Guardian and fight for the vision I have."

He probably sounded irrational, or naïve, Scott realized. He didn't care. He hadn't felt this certain in a long time. Deucalion was staring at him again, eyes overly wet with some type of emotion.

"A vision of peace?" he echoed.

The heated stare finally got to Scott and he scratched the back of his head, "Something like that." A watery chuckle answered and Scott tilted his head. "You good?"

"You're what I should have been, I can see that—maybe that's what I always saw in you, from the beginning." Deucalion wiped quickly at his eyes. "It's funny, you're a man now but some of that boy I first met is finally back in your eyes. The one that wanted to help, wanted to do the right thing. I missed him, god I missed that."

"Dude, stop, you're making me blush." Scott really wished his face would stop burning. "We can both be that, people who want peace and are willing to fight for it—but not to kill. No reason you can't be right there beside me."

Deucalion responded instantly, "I will, always."

Scott walked back towards the bed and sunk down, facing Deucalion and let the moment wash over him. The peace he felt inside, the calm of the air around them, the warmth in his chest. Deucalion's fingers tangled in his and they stayed like that for a while, simply content.

The moment was ruined by Kali barging into the room.

"Hate to break up the loving moment, but I overheard some of that. If we're moving I'd like the get the official announcement because I am fucking done with this place."

"Thanks for knocking, Kali." Scott deadpanned as Deucalion growled at her. She gave them both a once over.

"Nice markings," she winked at Deucalion and then rolled her eyes. "About time you two finally hooked up, be easier to deal with the old one now."

"Fuck you, Kali." Deucalion made as aggressive move but winced and suddenly sat back down. Scott suppressed a smile and Kali outright cackled.

"Guess our alpha claimed you pretty hard?"

"You only wish you had a lover half as good." Deucalion snapped back and Kali's jaw dropped.

"Shit that's low, bitch." Scott sent Deucalion a warning glare but the older wolf didn't seem to care. Kali's eyes went back to Scott. "Maybe next heat I'll offer myself to Scott, see what all the fuss is about."

"Kali..." Scott heaved a very loud sigh as Deucalion's hackles rose again and both wolves snarled at each other. "Please gather the others downstairs, we have a lot to discuss."

 

* * *

 


	8. Epilogue

* * *

 

The hike through the forest was longer than Scott remembered. The trees looked the same and the scent of pine was strong in the air, but there was something more. Something sharper and darker than Scott remembered; a calling.

The sun was rising in the distance, the moon slowly fading. Flowers were starting to bloom, signifying the start of spring yet Scott's breath showed in the morning air. The pack finally made it to the top of the ridge, Scott's heart pounding in his chest. He looked to the left and saw the same rock he and Allison used to leave messages for each other on.

It looked the same, as if no time had passed at all. Allison could appear at any moment, waving to him as they had their secret rendezvous. For a moment the world was still, trapped in the past and everything was preserved. But it passed and the world grew brighter as the sun rose higher.

"Scott?" Deucalion stood by his side, mouth drawn tight in concern. His beta—maybe mate one day?—stood with the rest of the pack, all ready to follow Scott into whatever hell was waiting for them. His pack of alphas, his brothers and sister. His family. This was the perfect place for them.

"I hope they're ready for us," he said, power swirling inside his eyes. "Because whatever evil is lurking in this city has never seen what we can do."

"A true alpha with a demon wolf leading a pack of alphas?" Deucalion responded, raising an eyebrow and sounding incredibly pretentious. His grin gave way to his sarcasm and his voice turned serious. "They won't know what hit them."

"Feels good to be home, doesn't it?" Derek asked and he clapped Scott on the shoulder, brother-in-arms to the end.

"Home..." Aiden and Ethan looked hopeful and then Adian nudged his brother in the ribs. "Think Danny will remember you?"

"Shut up!"

"Ha! You were totally thinking it." The twins glared at each other as Kali stepped forward, eyes bright with excitement.

"Can't wait to see what fun I'll have here, it's never been a boring town for me."

"We're with you, Scott." Deucalion murmured gently, fingers brushing gently against his. "Your pack stands united and strong. As...as do I. I will always be by your side." Scott's eyes met Deucalion's and everything was said in that one glance. Both men gave shy smiles in return.

The family with him was strong, but there were some members Scott had left behind: his mother, Allison, Lydia, Stiles. He had a lot to make up for, but guilt wasn't the way. _If you're going through hell, keep going_.

Beacon Hills lay before them, quiet and calm in the early morning but darkness laying within its depths. Darkness they would banish. Certainty burned inside Scott and a wild grin came to his face. Scott McCall was back.

Raising his head high Scott howled into the sky, announcing his return.

 

* * *

 

**The End.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First off, a big thank you to my two betas Stately_Demented and underwater-smiles. The former working with me for over a year until her studies took her away and the latter being amazing and coming in and working on a half finished story. I really couldn't have posted this story without them, they added quite a bit and helped keep me in check with characterization.
> 
> Second, a massive thank you to everyone who read and commented on this story omg its been a long time coming. From the beginning of season 3b to the end of 5b I've been tinkering with this story. Every comment has helped me move forward and not give up. I also wanna give a big hug to all my fellow Scott/Deucalion shippers. It's such a small ship, but everyone in it has been amazing. Hopefully I've given you guys a novel to enjoy like the other pairings get.
> 
> I know some people might be confused about why I stopped here and not continued with Scott seeing everyone again but Written in Blood was the focus on Scott's journey through darkness and now that part of his life is over and so is this story. I might write a new series that deals with Beacon Hills, I might not, I haven't decided if I want to invest in writing a long story or just go back to one-shots.
> 
> Regardless I hope YOU have enjoyed this story as much as I have! If you have any questions about the story or characters please please please hit me up, I'd love to talk. Let me know what you guys thought about the series as a whole, or even just the last few chapters.
> 
> That's all for now, it's been a pleasure writing for this ship.


End file.
